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OMEN MARY HAWORTH'S MAIL Woman Apprehensive of Future Is Advised to Seek Maturity Dear Mary Haworth: I am Bi 2, 3 Sist0fra , & musician, or gh of fi sb wg hobbies. I the eldest of five--four gir a boy. As a child I was more of a brat until the youngest, , was born. Mother was time, mot in good health, : rs said she might not ut she did. Foi ip nd her all day and my past mistakes w stage +H -EE § gone--whether she is ill, when is coming home; even if she is coming home. It seems I don't werry when I go and leave her home It started when my sister on the east coast had her first baby and wanted mother to be there, The night prior to mother's departure, my brother, who is very nervous, had a serious Shokiug Sell. We were lwcky to pull through, and mother took him along, to watch over him. I cried when they left but soon felt all right. They were gone nearly a month; Bi again. went, brother in my care; was under a nervous strain, fearful of what might happen to him in her absence FEARS ARE FOOLISH Now mother is leaving again, Fl with my sister and her child, Who ve ben visting us. She ya a week, an 'ee a with my sister, but I worry that she will have to return alone. She is in good health now and knows how to travel alone, so there is no reason to be fearful; nevertheless, I am. It is embarrassing to be teased for when she leaves, but I can't p it. Mother told me only last night that I'll have to get over this as she won't live forever and I shall be without hef®some time. I realize that; but the thought of being without your mother is hard. Can you help me? R.B. MOM CASTS SHADO' Ww Dear ly To Suggest the | nature or pattern your may you on the road to relief from . The overall evidence indicates that your morbid concern about your mother's welfare was im- planted by her; unintentionally, perhaps, in the sense that she 1s | didn't realize the import of her be- havior, nor foresee the harm it might do. Your anxiety picks up, exagger- ates 'and echoes back her fears about herself. This problem was in the making long prior to your brother's birth; but when your mother bruited the theory that she mightn't survive the event, your vague habitual worry about he! became specific and overwhelm- ing. You were scared sick by a conviction of inability to save her, gb take €ate of yoursell § you lost her, then. You haven't recovered from the shock yet, which also d you (at that time) the aching re- morse that sensitive children of rejecting mothers usually suffer, at be difficult involuntarily, in their blind struggle for filial sign- ificance. It seems safe to say that your mother s (in disposition) a helpless, unconsciously rejecting sort of parent, despite a conscient- ious oStensible effort to do her duty, no doubt. SEEK MATURITY In years of greatest stress in marriage, your mother conveyed her negative sentiments and dolor- ous feelings to her children, by eloquent attitude if not in plain words; thus warped their growth to some extent. The three you mention, your brother, your sister and yourself, all show unmistak- able (if different) symptoms of emotional injury. Each fearful and childish rather than self-re- liant, in facing adult tests; and each resembles the mother in this. Bungled rearing transmits this handicap down the line. Your married sister's bids for mother-care, your brother's chok- ing spell when she was going away (an attack that kept him under her wing), and your sick suspense when she is absorbed elsewhere, are infantile emotional trends, common to offspring of "mom"- mothers. For guidance to the up- lands of psychological maturity, read "Their Mother's Sons," by Dr. Edward A. Strecker (Lippin- cott), and "The Great Enterprise," by H. A. Overstreet. M.H. Mary Haworth counsels through her column, not by mail or per- sonal interview. Writer her in care of this newspaper. CHILD GUIDANCE Readers Show Their Appreciation Of Views Outlined by Columnist By G. CLEVELAND MYERS Rightly or wrongly, a good many parents, hearing or rea advice on bring up children, often want to know whether the adviser has children, and if he has, how his own advice has worked them. ' Naturally, the readers of this column often must have raised this question about Mrs. Myers and myself. We do feel sure that our teach- ings have worked with us and our children, in so far as we proved able to follow our own instructions. Of course, such a statement might not be very convincing, You want objective evidence and can hardly be absolutely sure we could give it accurately. OBJECTIVE EVIDENCE Perhaps objective evidence might be gathered by you or some other person who cared to as- semble it, if you knew the name and address of each of our three grown children and the "total of thirteen little children of their own. Anyone desiring this information might easily secure it by writing me in care of this paper. Our children and their ighooos could speak for themselves. I'm receiving now an increasing number of letters from mothers who say that some specific teach- ing in my column, or personal ad- vice by letter on some definite well with problem, has worked. The most |is encouraging type of letter often coming to me now is a voluntary account of one or more children from twelve to twenty-five, who seem to have become happy, lik- able persons and satisfying mem- ber of the family, with the added note that they were brought up with the help of my column. FROM YOUNG MOTHERS Now and then, a young mother writes that she began reading my column while in high school, often discussing it companionably with her mother, and she perhaps states that the column helped her have a happy Youth at home. I keep some of these letters in my des and bring them out and re-read them at moments when 1 feel pretty low. Often these mothers, writing of the son or daughter who has sur- passed even their fondest dreams of a happy, satisfying child, say they were glad they taught this child in his early years the mean- ing of No, and found so much en- joyment with him. Most say that my emphasis over the years on arents' trying to get on compan- onably with each other, cultivat- ing accord in guiding the children, and striving to provide a calm and happy family atmosphere proved very helpful. GOLFERS' CCA St. Andrews, birthplace of golf, on the east coast of Scotland between Edinburgh and Dundee. MRS. MAUD TOBEY Spry Octogenarian Has Full-Time Job HAMLTON (CP)--How to be a career woman at 81 is easily demonstrated by Mrs. Maud Tobey diminutive widow who works a in) full-time job in a city real estate office. Mrs. Tobey, who stands five-feet one and weighs 80 pounds, can compete with any young modern. She works a regular 9 to 5 day, doing clerical chores, g 3 She laughs at the thought of quitting. "Not unless it is neces- sary," she says, "wouldn't know what to do with self." The only concession she makes to her age is that she admits feeling "a little tired" after a busy day. KEEN MEMORY Mrs. Tobey greets many of the people in the office block by name and visitors to the office rarely have to repeat their name after their. first trip. She was born in Sarnia in 1872 and first went to business in Chatham when she was 20. 'She over-rode the objections of her parents, who wanted her to con- tinue her education, and m d a music store for a year, Music has always been her ab- sorbing interest. She was a church organist in Chatham, and until re- cently was active in groups here. She married Roy Tobey in 1899 and they moved to Hamilton, where he opened a men's clothing store. As the business grew, she helped her husband. After his death in 1946 she managed the business for several years. After selling out, she tried new fields working in a law office and later in a real estate office. "She's wonderful," her former employer, Miss Ethel Fagan, a lo- cal lawyer, recalled. "I even left her in charge of the office for two weeks on one occa- sion. She drew up several wills for people who were in a hurry and she did an exellent job. She was a Yory conscientious worker, very alert." Outside her work, Mrs. Tobey has few interests. She retires every night at 7:30 p.m. and rises at 7:30 a.m. "I have been blessed" is Mrs. Hee & o Look at the diagram -- even a beginner can whip up this honey of a dress in a day! FEW pattern parts, minimum details--a world of style! Curvey neckline, fitted boice and flared skirt are so smart, so-0-0 flattering! Choose rayon print, faille, cotton. attern 4558: Misses' Sizes 12, 14, 16, 18, 20; 30, 32, 34, 36, 38, 40, 42, Size 16 takes 3% yards 39-inch. This pattern, easy to use, sim- ple to sew, is tested for fit. Has complete illustrated instructions. This pattern, easy to use, sim- ple to sew, is tested for fit. Has complete illustrated instructions. Send THIRTY - FIVE CENTS (35¢) in coins (stamps cannot be accepted) for this pattern. Print plainly SIZE, N. A DRE STYLE NUMBER. Send order to ANNE ADAMS, c-0 Daily Times - Gazette, Pat- MAKING YOUR MARK Making your mark in the world everywhere you go with lipstick traces is no longer considered ne- cessary, beauty experts say. Dur- ing an hour-long beauty show every rnoon during the Canadian In- ternational Hobby and Homecraft demonstrate how to make sure that you are"smear-proof". | BEAUTIFUL BROADLOOM RUGS Your old rugs, carpets ond discord- ed clothing rewoven into a beoutiful Broadloom. Fascinating colors ond patterns. No obligation to see our DIAL 5-1553 Tobey's explanation of her unusual health and activity. SS, | stitch--just a stroke of Show, Feb. 5-13, the experts will |G "Sari Gowns" Make Canadian Debut OTTAWA (CP)--Rosemary Kay is a tall blonde who, next to de- Siznin ev owns and cock- ja Ri - to talk about m She especially likes to discuss Pakistani saris and the "com- pletely distinctive' formal and semi-formal dresses she makes from this filmy, diaphanous cloth hand-woven from finely eombed cotton or silk. In an interview she said she is the first Canadian designer to make '"'sari gowns ' though gowns from Indian saris have been in fashion in New York and) Paris for several months. A 29-year-old native of Montreal, Mrs. Kay devoted most of her at- tention to her husband, Dr. K. pr ge Rd e) 's occupation e laboratory here, and to two young IRON-ON-DESIGNS By ALICE BROOKS VIVID PARAKEETS brighten and beautify linens with their gorgeous tropical plumage. Not a an iron transfers them in all the beauty of their royal blue, forest green and ruby red coloring! Iron on guest towels"frame for pictures -- enhance table linens, skirts, blouses! Iron on! Washable! Colorful! Pattern 7152 has six iron-on para- keet designs in color: four, 5x5% two, 4%x5 inches. Send TWENTY-FIVE CENTS in coins for this pattern (stamps can- not be accepted) to D. imes - azette, Household Dept., Oshawa, Ontario. Print Rlainly NAME ADDRESS, PATTERN TEN COMPLETE PATTERNS to sew, embroider, crochet--print- ed right in the Alice Brooks Needlecraft Book! Plus many more patterns to send for -- in- cluding gift ideas, bazaar money- makers, toys, fashions! Send cents now! daughters untfl last August. Then hme 10, core seslming. someting time ve des , 80! she had dabbled in for about 16 years, a real try. Since opening her workshop she has turned into gowns, materials ranging from inexpensive uphol- stery fabrics, woollen flannel and Canadian cotton prints to lavish, expensive batik, a hand-painted cof , 2% yards of which can take as Jong, as a Jear to produce. SACRILEGE TO CUT . "It was almost a sacrilege to cut it," she said "but I did it-and I'm glad." Her chief concern, however, is that her creations 'drape well and wear well." Inexpensive fabrics that are easily washed often drape as well and last longer than ex- pensive ones, she said. Her sari gowns are distinctive, THE DAILY TIMES-GAZETTE, Friday, February §, 19% 9 and ve, starting at $120 + cause each is made from a ar- ate sari and no two in color or design. A N yards long and 45 inches wide, is simply draped around women of India, Pakistan and other Far East SOuntries ip Sich a way that it . Can women, appar- iy prefer them cut into more conventional apparel for formal wear. HOT WATER CARE Vessels of scalding water should never be put on the floor where small children might fall into them. The handles of kettles or saucepans should always be turned towards the back of the stove so that they cannot be pulled over. handling \ ceive dangerous cuts. VARIETY IN HANDBAGS In the leather handbag depart ment, the popular tote bag can be found in ever) ype of leather from cowhide to . And, in all the ponular colors including off-white, polay bear, the honey beige and rown family and down the spec- trum to y blues. You'll find a v. clutches and evening s in lus- chaning shades. of pink > chan 8 , mauve, violet, Moy grey, , green, gold and silver too. GLASS DISPOSAL Put broken glass into a carton and tie it safely, so that anyone the article will not re- ys and of little OSHAWA FURRIERS 11 KING ST. EAST Over CPR Express Office DIAL 3-8322 OH! 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We also combine the highest stan- dards of the profession in preparing these prescriptions for your health ! JURY LOVELL COMPOUNDING YOUR DOCTORS PRESCRIPTION 15 QUR SFECALTY .8 KING ST. E 530 SIMCOE ST S PHONE 3-2245 PHONE 5 - 3546 Also expert paper-hanging can be arranged. 2--Stores To Serve You 5 King W. 92 Simcoe N. WE CARRY A FULL LINE OF PAINTS Special Saturday OSHAWA PAINT & WALLPAPER 315 SIMCOE §. We Deliver DIAL 3-2472 P