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igs .' WHATS THE USE? "@randmother Page refused to budge. I turned her over again, but there wag no sign of life. I squirted gasoline into her cylinders, but she didn't seem to care for it. As you may have surmised, Grandmother Page is a relation of mine only by adoption amd pur- chase. She originally was created and assembled by the Page Motor Company of Detroit, but that was 50 long ago that her years fully entitle her to the title of "Grand- mother." She has had a hard life, too. For four years she has been going near- ly everywhere that I go, and for a long time before that she was the traveling companion of a suburgan real-estate man who could sell gold bricks to placer miners. I suspect that he taught her some of her de- ceitful tricks. It must have been from him that she got her love of the country. She revels in green fields and running prooks and sand-banks and mud- holes. Whenever she finds one she always wants to stay there all day. The farther it is from the city the better she likes it. I personally am fonder of the eity, and when she decides to re- main all night on some road four- teen or fifteen miles from any- where I have sometimes 'walked home rather than share the sylvan solitudes with her, Under my hreath T murmured: "Durn you, Grandmother," and hit the engine a vindictive tap with a monkey wrench, "Maybe there is no gasoline In the magneto," suggested Maryella, who had watched my stdugg's from the front seat. A I made no reply. When some one begins offering me suggestions af- ter I have tried every known trick on a stalled motor I find that the only way to preserve my reputation as ¢ gentleman ig to keep absolute- ly silent. Even Maryella, whom I have been trying for two years to per- suade to become Mrs. Tom Bilbeck, ean draw fire from me on such a dynami~ occasion. "We've got to get home, Tom," she fretted. "There's a rehearsal of 'Pygmalion and Galatea' thing." No, readers, we are not actors. 1 am positive of that. Our stage- work receives mention only in the tonight, and if we're away they can't do 2 to pass that way. I had purposely chosen a back-country road for my drive with Maryella that day. This machine was coming from town, I looked at a turn of the road around which it would presently appear. Maybe it was a friend of mine. The car rounded the turn, I swore under my breath. It was the racing runabout bhe- longing to Jim Cooper. No situation that I could imagine would please him more and me less than that in which we were placed. He pulled up alongside of Mary- ella, who had proceeded about two or three blocks before he arrived.q After a short parley she got in be- side him. I gnashed my teeth, but thanked' Heaven that. I would soon be alone to express my opinion en automobiles, nature, human beings and things in general, No such luck, The car was com- ing on towara me. It pulled up alongside of Grandmother Page. Maryella looked off across the tields on the other side of the road, but the driver got.down from his seat and inspected Grand- mother Page. "What's the matter? Won't the engine run?" Jim Cooper is the kind of a man who would ask a question like that. His sense of humor is very low, just above that of an anthropoid ape. When bromidioms were being pass- ed around he took one of each. I'll admit that he is rather a good-looking chap. His hair just es- capes being too blond and he has a along that was {rresistible. If a man must lose his head over a woman, Maryella's type offers the utmost justification. If you had any curiosity and a wee bit of nerve, you made up your mind that you would have to find out wheth- er to believe her eyes or the rest of her face. Up to that afternoon I had been doing pertty well, too. Not having money in bales, I had started a- gainst Cooper with a considerable handicap. He worked short hours in his father's office, which would eventually be his; while I plugged away for a salary--sa good one, put nothing that would make the mint work overtime to keep up with me. There {8s no use concealing what my job is. A good many people know already from having seen my name signed at the bottom of 8 column of alleged humer which 1 conduct dally for a syndicate of newspapers. Any one who hag read my stuff knows that I work hard for my money, especially when I write verse. : Besides my syndicate work I do all the big stories for the Daily Mail, which ig the principal morn- ing paper of our city. It is pleas- ant, because I do not have to be in the office constantly like a re- gular reporter, When they need me they send for me. When there is a big political convention or a disaster or a sensational murder I usually cover it. I had been offered a job ag war correspondent, but I declined. Just because Irvin 8. Cobb got back with musache such as you see on the : Maryella saglety column. sHarity before people who have to like us because we represent such worthy causes. Whenever the So- efal Settlement sends up a yell for funds we spend about a thousand dollars' worth of time enticing five hundred people to part with fifty cents each to hear us forget our lines. When Belgium needs bread or the Fiji Islanders run out of pants, who comes to the rescue ragardless of consequences? The Sheridan Dramatic Club! And now we were doing "Pyg- malion and Galatea" for the Old Beldiers' Home, which needed some new window-shades or an electric piano, I've forgotten which. "Besides," continued Maryella, shivering slightly, "it's getting colder, and I think I felt a drop of rain a minute ago." ""That being the case," T observ- sd sarcastically, "we'll start." "Let's," she encouraged, Grandmother Page and I repeat- ed our justly celebrated repertoire pf tricks, from cdjusting the spark-coil to putting gasoline in pur eye while lying prone under the tank, Each separate adjust- ment was preceded and followed by reducing-exercices with the start- Ing-crank. "Jim Cooper has a self-starter on his car," Maryella observed gym- pathetically while I was trying to catch my breath. "Then why," I inquired in ley exasperation that I regretted in- stantly. "why ddw't you marry Jim Cooper, if you're so crazy about a self-starter?" "Oh!" exclaimed Maryella, inar- ticulate with rage at my remark. "You have no right to insult me like that!" "I didn't mean to dear." . I forgot Grandmothér Page for the moment in my anxiety to square myself for my tactical blun- der. It was the wrong move. My very humility made her think that she really had heen offended in some way, so she dabbed at her pretty syes to see if she could scare up a tear. She could not. That made her more angry. : "I know one thing," she stated, clambering out of the seat. "I'll never ride in your old car again as long as I lve!" She started down the road. "rn walk home first!" Why are girls of twenty so ador- able--and why are men a few years older such fools about them? The answer to that question may ex- plain also why I followed her thro- ugh the dusk that was part twilight and part gathering rAnstorm, "Listen, Maryella," I called after her. "Be reasonable." No response, "You can't walk all the home. It's ten miles." "I'd probably have to walk any- way," she observed dispassionate. ly, "so I might as well get started pefore dark." That remark about walking home anyway was the crowning in- sult to me and Grandmother Page. It hurt the more because it was prodably true. I turned back an-| insult you, way We perform for '| drizzle, but I thought too little of men in the clothing advertisements. Nature did all she could for the outside, but let him go without fill. ing in the place which was original- ly intended for a mind. Whatever people seem to be doing he does without questioning whether there is any sense in it, He plays golf because so many others seem to enjoy it, not from any love of the game, He is one of Maryella's ad- mirers for the same reston, Maybe I am projv" iced, but I can't believe that I~» really appre- ciates her adorablenc:s. Maryella is flattered by his at- tention, not knowing what a small tribute it is. The fact that he asks her opinion on every move he mak- es, from changing brands of tooth- powder to buying a summer home, caters to her love of power. "Are you sure you've got gaso- line in the tank?" Jim Cooper continued his ruth- less assault on the . remaining shreds of my temper. : "The trouble {s in the spark,' I volunteered briefly looking a round for a weapon in case he should ask another question. | "Oh! Can I give you a lift home old man? Of course, there fsn't an extra seat, but you could sit on the gasoline-tank at the rear. I think it will hold you." He surveyed me doubtfully. A slight dhicker from the lady in the car spurréd me to a quick refusal. I "No, thank you. I'll have my car going in a few minutes." v "Oh! Miss Waite wouldn't go at all." "Did she?" I murmured polite. Iy "I didn't know that she was in- terested." | "Maybe we had better wait," he suggested, "until you get started, and follow you into town. Then it anything goes wrong we can pick you up along the road." "Please don't," I urged, with just a shade of feeling showing in my voice. "Just as you say, old top. I'd like awfully well to help you it 1 could." He got back into hig car and In. sulted us once more with the sub« dued but efficient purr of his elec: tric starter. Then waving at me airily, he turned about and disap- peared in a cloud of dust toward the city. I sat by the roadside and told, myself that I was probably one of the seven worst "'fussers" in the United States and the Dominion of Canada. I had played my game like a fifteen-jeweled boob. The first rule for making a girl eat out of your hand is never to let her know when you get mad, The second is not to be sorry if you do. I had a blow-out in both rules. While I sat there it began told me it to myself to care to move, so I did- n't. Instead I recollected with de-| lightful pain how eminently desir- able Maryella was, ) Slim and slender and cool-look-! ing, she was obviously the Aandi-| work' of a beauty-loving god who, wanted to show what he could do. Watciog te Suge from te Fit aa of all his arms and, legs attached is 0 sign that they wouldn't be able 0 hit the next fat man that went over, | When I was thoroughly wet through so that it didn't make any difference what I did, I decided that I might as well gtart for home, It would be more comfortable to die of ppeumonia in my own bed. So I got up and sloshed: over to the car to get my.coat, which I had laid aside when the contest be- tween me and Grandmother began. Just by way of a passing ex- pression of my feelings I gave the crank a turn. "Bang!" The engine started. ! I stood in the rain a full min- ute longer'relieving my mind be- fore I mounted to my seat and steered Grandmother Page back over the sloppy roads to the city. What was the use now? \ . (Continued To-morrow) IRISH GASTLE OF EARL OF ANTRIM I3 DESTROYED BY FIRE $3,500 Furniture in One Room Completely Destroyed Glenarm Castle, the historic resi- dence of the Earl and Countess of Antrim, has been destroyed by fire. The outbreak was first noticed by a member of 'the household, staff, who was attracted by a strong small of burning wood coming from a small bedroom on the top storey of the east wing. The alarm was raised, but the fire had gained a strong hold, and all efforts to subdue it failed when the roof collapsed, and the firemen directed their energies 'in an att- empt to save the servants ters in the sonth block. they were successful. Furniture valued at over £700 was destroyed in one bedroom in the main building. Among the treasures beleived to be in the castle, parts of which date from 1636, were two treas- ure chests taken from the wreck of an Armada galleon that went ashore on the rocks near Glen- arm. Piles Go Quick Piles are caused by congestion of blood in the lower bowel. Only an internal remedy can remove the cause. That's why salves and cut- ting fail. Dr. Leonhardt's Hem- Roid, a harmless tablet, sucuveas, because it relieves this congestion and strengthens the affected parts. Hem-Roid has given quick, safe In this But she had eyes, dark ones, that grily. She trudged on.... Down the road came a purring aotor. I had nardly expected a car came from no heavenly wonk-shop In them there was a bit of temper, of daring and an invitation to come | and lasting relief to thousands of Pile sufferers. It will do the 'ome for you or money back*Jury & Lovell and druggists everywhere sall Ham.Raid with this sus)untea, (} 1 ' quar-" | | Rt. Hon. Winston Churchill, chancellor of the exchéquer in the former British Conservative gov- ernment, lands at Quebec at the end of this week upon a visit to Canada. Accompanying him will be his son, R ph, and a nephew, Major John Chamberlain. Col. L. S. Amery, former secretary for the dominions, also accompanying the party, will leave immediately upon arrival for an camping trip in the Aolnh Rockies. The photographs hers show different interesting phases of Winston Churchill's career: (1) As a major in the Yeomanry dor. ing the war; (2) characteristic fighting expression; (3) as a polo player; (4) most recent photograph of Winston Churchill, showing him as he is today; (5) as a young man in politics when his energies were directed toward prison reform; (6) in the paddock at Worcester Pari polo mest, and (7) as a well-known fizure in the streets of London, ACTORS' STRIKE HOLLYWOOD DRAMA Attempt is Being Made to Unionize the Film Players Hollywood, Aug. 12.--The greatest drama in Hollywood to-day is not being filmed. It is a "strike" of some thousands of screen players who are members of Actors Equity Associa- tion against the motion picture pro- ducers in an attempt to unionize the film players. The word "strike" is put between quotation marks because officially no strike order has been issued. In ev- ery practical respect, however, it is nothing less, for since June 28, by official decree, no Equity member not under contract before June 5 "may set foot upon stage, set or Jocation" until the controversy is settled. As a result of this clash, Equity leaders say approximately 2,800 film players are today out of work in Hollywood and = forbidden to take jobs in the studios until the producers agree to accept the contract, for the recognition of which Equity is fight- ing. The players' leaders now claim to have enlisted under their banner 85 per cent of the active members of the profession in Hollywood. For the most part the stars and leading featured players who are E- quity members are still at work in the studios, for they are under con- tract to the producers. As their con tracts expire, however, they will be compelled to take a stand with their fellow workers in the = firms, the players of less prominence as film figures, or to desert the organization. A number in this group have open- 1y pledged themselves to walk out the moment their contracts expire or earlier if Equity asks it. Ann H#d- ing, for example, stirred an Equity meeting by exclaiming: "If a walk- out comes, no one will beat me to the door." Lewis Stone, who had been reported as prophesying Equi- ty's failure in the fight, and denying this statement, thrilled the crowd by declaring, "When the big gesture is made, you will find me on my trunk in the alley alongside of you," George Arliss, Chester Conklin Geo, Jessel, Frank Faye, Charles Chase, Reginald Denny, James and Lucille Gleason, Joseph Schildkraut and a host of others now under con- tract to various producers have left no doubt as to where they hoi and what they will do. Drafted Equity Members Twenty-five Equity members, how- ever, have accepted new contracts from the studios on the old terms, and they have been suspended from the organization, while others have expressed . dissatisfaction with the present movement. The situation is a direct outgrowth of the revolutionary change in the film industry which practically wiped out the silent screen and put the talking picture in its place. With the arrival of the audible film the producers immediately turned fo Broadway for experienced actors and a veritable invasion of Hollywood by legitimate and vaudeville stage play- ers resulted. ' A great many of these newcomers to the film capital were members of the principal organization of stage players, the Actors' Equity associa- tion, while many well-known screen players, who had come from the stage, also held Equity cards. While Equity was not without a part in the producer-player contro- versy of two years ago in Hollywood when producers sought to effect a sharp cut in salaries, its membership here then was comparatively small and its position correspondingly weak. At one time, according to Pres ident Gilmore, there was a demand from Equity members in pictures for relief from what they called unfair and difficult working condition. But it was not until the talking picture had become established that steps leading directly up to the present si- tuation began to be taken. On June 4 an ultimatum went to the Association of Motion Picture Prodcers, headed nationally by Will H. Hays, and in Hollywood by Cecil B. De Mille: It declared that begin- ning the following day all filf play- crs taking individual speaking parts in "sound and talking pictures," from the stars down to those known as "bit" players, would have to be sign- ed according to the terms of the pro- posed Equity contract. At the same time Equity stated its willingness to discuss with the pro- ducers each clause in the suggested agreement, to modify such as might seem to require' change and to sub- mit to impartial arbitrators any ques tions on which agreement could not be reached. Later, on June 28, Equi- ty widened the scope of its move by including those doing chorus and "at- mosphere" work, and made the or- der cover silent as well as audible films, Unions Entered The fat was then well in the fire and the crackling soon began to be heard. For years Southern California has been one in the last great out- posts of non-unionism, and every at- tempt at organization by workers in commerce and industry has met the stiffest kind of opposition from em- ployers and business interests. The film industry, pride of the Southland, has stood shoulder to shoulder with manufactrers and other employers in trying to keep unionism out of this territory and to maintain open shop conditions. Four years ago, however, ' the craftsmen in the studios began to get a toe hold in attempting to or- ganize the films. The studio electri- cians were the first to obtain recog- nition, Once the electrical workers were successful other groups fol- lowed, and to-day, excepting the players, virtually every branch of workers in the studios is organized and working under an agreement ef- fected by its union. WITH THE HAIR, OR WITHOUT A magazihe writer says a dog fills is especially true of the hot dog. C.P.R. Champion Sheep Canadian Pacific flock of Suffolk sheep at Tilley, Alta.,~there are 800 of them--have been Sweeping the board in western stock exhib: tions lately. Against strong com- petition at the Saskatoon Exhibi- tion they won 'every first prize and every championship. _ Also shown in above is the C.P.R- champion Hampshire ram which took first prize in e show in which t was entered. sheep and cattle on the C.P.R. exper- imental farms in the West are doing a great work in improving | Provinces, stock in the Prairie an empty place in a man's life. This: ARCH FORGER IS GIVENTEN YEARS London.--Described by Sir Ern- est Wild, K.C,, the Recorder, as an '"arch-forger"'--the greatest forger at large for some time," James Brady, 41, a bookmaker, was sen- tenced at the Old Bailey, London, to ten years' penal servitude. Brady, who is also known as Barney, was charged with forging cheques for £4,000, £210, and £193. Mr. Percival Clarke, prosecuting, said Brady was one of the most ex- pert forgers known to the police. In November last, two men named Chandler and Roberts, and a young woman named Maud Gordon, were sentenced at the Central Criminal Court in connection with the same charge. Brady disappeared and the po- lice have been hunting for him ever since. Arms Found In Rooms At the rooms he had occupied in Stoke Newington were found two pistols, some ammunition, a life- preserver, and the paraphernalia of a forger. Detective-Inspector Yandell said Brady was well-educated and was in the banking department of a well-known London -house for 18 months until he was 20, when he received his first sentence, one of 20 months' imprisonment for for- gery. In his rooms were found tracings of signatures, and evidence of his having obtained £1,518 17s. by for- geries during the last 12 months. It was stated on behalf of Brady that on the expiration of his sen- tence a woman had promised to pay his passage to Australia, te give him a fresh start in life. Alluding to an allegation made at the trial of other members of the gang in November last, Brady, from the dock, said: '"The state ment that I bribed the police offi- cer to protect me is a lie." What more than one ambitious aviator wants is an endurance rec- ord that has some endurance w Need a2 woman's hands Pai? say --"I have no maid'? L 0 305 leading beauty shops answer: "With all our experience, we ff are unable to distinguish between / the hands of 2a woman who never *. washes dishes and those of a house-' ** wife who uses Lux in the dishpan.". %y _ JUST IMAGINE--here is beauty care right in your dishpan--the wisest, most inexpensive beauty care known! Every time you wash dishes in Lux your hands receive the soothing, gentle care that keeps them white and soft--and it costs almost nothing! 'Lux for all your dishes costs Jess than Ica day! Compare this with the" women of leisure give expensive care their, hands. . 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