ï»¿ BREAKFAST FIT FOR A
HEINZ CP P G
KETCHUP 2 1 - 39c CoIIu IGAXOFFEE I Gr^A-large^ :
SUNNY MORN 'i Â«Â». bag 49c Oil KELLOGGS QO
hSPECIAt "K" 2 49Â« S
â€¢ . .- ' JANUARY 7, 8, 9
IGA CHEESE ^-------â€"
â- -.s ' WE RESERVE THE RIGHT -
n^i, . y IF ^ TO LIMIT QUANTITIES
SLICES Â® ',2 8 oz-pkgs- 5 J4
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TABLE RITE QUALITY MEATS |
TO START THE BUSY DAY OFF RIGHT IGA ROYAL GUEST SLICED RINDLESS
"" A REAL BREAKFAST TREAT
>â€¢ W ROYAL GUEST SMALL LINK - PURE
III ^^^ PoifcSausage 39*
SPECIAL FROZEN FEATURE
I SWANSON MAIN COURSE Â£ BEEF GRAVY WITH POTATOES 39'
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fcv TENDERGARDEN-FRESHâ€"UTS-NOH -<;<)()!) ^
| j NEW CABBAGE -fc^&D -1
FLORIDA GRAPEFRUIT 10 Â« 49< |
Passing Olandes % Gamble ^
AN OLD YEAR'S RESOLUTION
To begin with, let me explain that my last week's column was a belated Christmas column. It's my fault; I didn't submit it in time. In deciding to use it last week, my editor had no alternative but to cut out all the bits pertaining to Christmas; thus giving the article rather a shoppy appearance.
I first noticed it while I was reading it aloud. Since my wife vas present, I asked her opinion, . ' sying, "How did that .sound to j, ou?- Hcr-answer is too clasical s o be omitted. Shooting me a '. ilirie glance, she replied, "Like *Iack the Knife,'. sung backwards v i 1 Sanskrit, by Mr.'McGoo."
Well,- I guess I asked for ..it, f ut seriously, I'm sorry my~edi- ( br's scissors slipped when he ( ante to the part where I wished â€¢II my readers a Merry Christmas c tnd a pleasant New-Year. I hope t's liot too Tate to extend this j yish, and to send a special 'lhanfc ! I â€¢ou' to those kind readers wjio ent me Christmas cards.
Well now^what had Hn mind j iir this week? Oh. yes, now Ii ' ;cmember! You know it has always been my ambition to'open a bank account but I never seem- 1 -.d to have enough money. I nearly did it a ycai-ago:" Yuu see,-
finished up 1958 by borrowing ' lie "money to drink a toast to 1
-4959, ----â€"â€"----â€"....... â€" <
I con still remember that L'.UK. -! > Vcw Yeaii'-s JA'Ci-party; it was=^Â»â€" I - yild .o.ns,. I guess-I wasâ€ži:fially ; 6 blame. I mean, I-just couldn't ; cc the point in borrowing money to drink to one measly little year? wJiat.wilh putting.my. name on all those bits of paper and chasing around trying ;.to find co-signers and so forth.
I figured if I had to go to. all that trouble, T might as well drink toasts to all the years I had missed, so I borrowed a bundle. | Well, as I mentioned, the party
I U'ac a wild fine___.Theâ€"guests
-Imost came to blows, trying ^o i.e'cide on a good year to begin ivith. Onq idiot suggested the | vear '65' A. D., since that was the ; vear Nero kicked his wife, 1'op-oaea, to death: thus striking the first blow towards the freedom
I of henpecked husbands. The g wives present, almost kicked this
II character to death for bringing | it'Up. ^____.
However, wcF8tJ setTle^tbT' tUBG, the year that has 'All That' after jt. as -being a good one to commence with. I bclicve-.it has something to do with-the Battle - of Hastings, or-some other Eng-! lijl.t seaside town, if my memory â- | serves mc well. â- _ In any case, by [ the time we got to 1-153. the I Turks were capturing Constanti-I noole, and was I glad..
Somewhere, around 1798. I was cheering my fool head off for a young. Cofsican soldier by the name of -Napoleon Bonaoarle, Who oddly.enough, was .trvi.ng to sneak-into India bv way of EtÂ«pt. Too many traffic lights the other wa<; I guess, j After that. I skipped, a .few _:------j_:_:_:_
years and-, would probably have emerged as the least inebriated -guest at the party if we hadn't ..come -to the year Bardot- was born. All my reserves were shot
right there. 'â€¢ "'-.; -------',
Nineteen hilnflred' and -fifty, nine was . fast approaching, and with only seconds to go,-soVik-one switched on the.TV. We all stood poised: glasses held aloft in readiness for immediate action. - No sooner had the little 'cupid' guy conic Icaring through the calendar than someone yelled. "Happce Nuo Yeari" and -the1â€"smacking sound of colliding lips echoed through the building.
We drank a toast to '59. and when the last goblet had shattered .in the fire place, the party fell flat on its' face^ W.e had run out on years, and- no one could
Soon, everyone was astecp-cverydnc, that is, exctpt' myself
and onfriOthc'r'stalvfArL who was Kneeling: in fhe-cerit'cr of the floor; still toasting" tlic wifc-kick-iiig Nero. ,... -
'. t crawled into a "corner, with a fresh b'oltle of champagne. That was lUy moiufint.of truth. As an escape from. tliV boredom, I began subtracting the. number of bubbles, in the ,bottle, from the iiuni-. ber of dollars in the. interest on my loan. The aiisw.er was. fabulous. '.It was then -that my'New Year's resolution was' born,1 I Would open tny first bank account 'in- -Ifl59:- ', .V> 'â- " ' " â€¢ ' ""Nineteen . Hundred and" fifty-nine'piogressed, and by the tinic _the last leaf of Autumn had fluttered to the grass to die and the angelic expression on ray Thanksgiving turkey's face indicated that it had-relinquished all hope for reprieve, I was no nearer tny goal. It seemed as if I wasn't going to make it. I just didn't
â- r â€¢
sec lioW I -could possiblj* open a bank account-without money. .Then, when all appeared to bo lost, my many friends rallied-to rliy aid. Thli' gifts came pouring in ami with Ihenva sudden brainwave, I sold the gifts. '
Now, before proceeding further, 1 sliould-mcntion that, as .a cliild, one df the fitsi. things I did was to makd ii list of all the people I would distrust as'I ambled my ambitious way '.â€¢ .through-' life. Third place on that list, just below 'rumor-mongers', I award-_ cd to salesmen. '... . : -- .
Dc spile this.; h.owetfer, I have ! to admit that after, my own experience as a salesman, I am now â€¢ left with a 'certain anjount of ' adinkation--forâ€"thisâ€"high-pres-. sure'.- fraternity. The stubborn 5â€"l-csista n w^-thcv'-lia v e-t o-s t i-ug g 1 e against is apilalling. I did it. I. and Cknow. .Â»
5 For example, have you over . tried to sell a pair of used ballel shoes to a .market gardener?. Well, it isn't easy. I had a heck SlL a Job convincing him thai the
_ .oldâ€"lady who_bad_previously-
owned them, only da/iced on Sundays. But it was the clean heels, which had hardly been used at all, thai finallv did the trick. " â€¢-â- â€¢â€¢!_'.-
y Another, gill, which I bad-sonic â- troilble unloading, was a Lottie of dandelion-wced kilter. "Fights
__jdandclions wilh a vengeance," the
label - guaranteed, litov most people know that although' this sHiff figltis with a vengeance,, il never wins. So, resorting to f p rather sneaky bit of stralcgcm ^ I chanpcil the label for. one en-
c JJtled. "Hair Restorer." If yoi l sec a guy walking'around will j. 'black "aiitl blue' dandruff, he's th< (I one who bought il. '
Anyway, with the money I re d ceived for these two gifts, plus n the 98 cents I got for.the pair o 0 pipe Vacks. liiarkcd 'His' and (0 'llers'. wlpch sonic wise guy sen (l inc. I finished up with the prince D Iy sum of SG.35. '
(j -Trying lo open a bank accoun with this amount, is anolhei ,e stoiy-onc which I. shall -relati /s next week. a __'
Teachers Urge, End Municipal Bickering
Mr. Willard Fish, of Newmarket High School staff was among the 250 delegates from all parts of Ontario who attended the three-day assembly of the 11, 000-member Ontario Secondary School Teachers' Federation in the last week in December.
Don Thomas, principal of In-gersoll District Collegiate. Institute, Ingersol, Ont., was-electcd i president of Ihe federation for i I9B0. Greater independence for trustees was urged by Dr. II. O. Barred, retiring president of OSSTF. ;. . â€¢', '
In his presidential address he suggested the bickering between boards'of education and humici-