A K... I I- l..k Tbr* sports :<H inln a railroad of oaj, A railroad oar, with a p ujk of cards. Tby oaiisil " h*ar " "AiTar," and Uioi - wai " thar." And they always i|>oko to each ether as "parti*." For sports there ars. booth gool and pjoi Protesti >oal and amateur. Where railroad train! arc running. Tbey wanted a fourth at a poker baud. TLroe were they aud they were oue abort, And Ibejr asksd a ilraugar if he d b tlie Band T j try a little game (ur (port. For ir>iii!Kn> the are wsorv men abound. Au.l ynu'li !>. flud a traugr round Where railroad! tram, are running. Tbe stranger didn't know tbe game. But be willing Ui live and learo; To him tbe carda were all Ibe satue- They aa so all al iir*t be'd bearnl' Aud tbe upvrta lauf.hr 1 loud aud dealt the pack, Aud gave biui (our >|uens and a tbick legged Jack. A* they will when traini are running. And then they bet on the poker baud Aud fatU'ued ue |xjt to a goodly piln, And tnty asked the atrauKor i( be would stand. And tbe stranger suxxi, tih a niwple Slulle, Aud oue soort raiwd Ibe other two. Aiid the slrauger bitu, as siraugvr* do W here railroad trains are running. And then In a solemn, brealbles* bush, Tbe tbree sport* bowed what tuey bad got ; but ace* wou't Lust * royal llu-h. And tbe stranger gobbled that ubess pot. Kor Mrainivrs aud a|rt are uatural (ow, it. I tbe foriuer carry car.ls lu thuir clu'vs. Where railroad train* are rtiuuin< Chrwciaa at Work. TMK K91t**tKS) ftl UKMIB. II- l.i. nil.il I H. lp,..ii. nil. It. ....in. KapMI* a lo.r . Tba Queen ban invited lb Empress KunoMd to pay another visit to, Sootlaud thin autumn, aud il in probable that sbe will occupy Abet- geldie Castle (ur a *nor Him* 10 Ojto ber. alter the Priuoe and 1'riuoea* of Wale* have lolt for tbe *outb, says a London paper. According lo tbe European gossip* tue '' of toe ex-Eaipreas Kaiicuie i* drewiun very near to a clone. Were it otherwise there would be still great ar grounds for urprue. 11 tba ex Empress' 111* ban not baeu a long one, at leant it ban beau crowded witu eveute exoitlUK aud sorrowful after a rnauuer ui pralleled ID modem history. Huob writer* an Irving and Mttriuiee bave prevented to n* tbe little otnld m frocks, aud a* well tbe graotfu' Xirl in ber teem, UDOJU*CIOU* of Ibe (at* wbiob tbe (uture beld in ".n- (or ber Kraud and gloomy. Bnleudid ai wa ber oareer duriug tue *ecoud empire so (a'r and ao familiar in all IU feature* that the ewiug Kirl* of 1'arii put atide their braziers of obarooal and resolved to live atid become empraim it wa* by DO Lusan* oue ot unalloyed enjoyment. Her life waa spent under tbe aim o( tbe aw.au in. or ID* was made Ibe target of (oee Hill more meroileee o( pArsgraphers aud of polemic*, who did uombriuk (rom libelliuK with impartial iuali({uity the sovereign, tbe wife and tbe met Her. Even about the day* when tbe aeooud entire WM orumbliuK into tbe abys*. history ba> twiued a gar laud of dishonoring invention, aud we bave :be Empress declaring : " Tbm u my little war 1" or dismission the faithful o( the Tuileriee with tbe dippant adieu: "My (rieod*. we bave played oat tbe faroe !" when, all the time, abe wa engaged with tbe crowding flairof a disorganized state, ji trembling (or her bubaud aud eon, or flyiug (or h life from a (ate worse tbau that o( tbe I'M noes* Lam balls. Tbe life of tbe ex -Empress Eugenie einee tbe diiMter o( Hedau ba been mournf al 10 tbe extreme. The crumbling of tbe labrio jf tbe second empire wu (allowed by the death of ber buiband, aud u linn auo deeded oloaely tbe death of ber mother and tbe taking off of her only child, tat gallant aud ill fated Prince 1. >ui. 8mce he fell, tbroit through with /ulu (peart, aod tbe bopee of a Bouapartist reetoratiou were .mitten by tbe shook, he ha. remained a mother of Borrow, mourning (or ber dead with a einoenty thai malignity jould not impeach, aud that ha* acquired (or ber tbe re*pMt aod pity o( the world. Rarely, i( ever, in tbe world'! biitory. bM ao (air a noonday been followed by eo black a night. That the end o( ber day* u near at band BO one who ha* noted the ooudi- tion o( the ex Empreec' health can doubt. She will go down to the grave a woman miiandentood and miirepreeented, to her generation a flirt, a fanatic and a dictator o( (oolUh (aebione, and to tbe (ew wbo bave read tbe Imee of ber itrong character a woman o( real talent, of (ervid affeoiion*. and of virtue* beyond Ibe reach alike uf denial and o( detraotion. s. .......I Tbe olixjk on tbe mantel tolled 1 a m. and a little put, and still tbe knight ling- ered, trying to think of somethiog to nay, although it waf painfully eviJeot that tbe ( baron'* daughter wai jutt too tleepy (or anything. I am afraid," be laid at lait ; " that I am like an auger." "Wherefore, air knight?" the aaked, yawning with that high bred oourUwy appertaining to the upper olaaie*. BeokDse I bore you," be nail, atmling proudly at bii good right wit. Ab, no," ibe eaid ; " you remind me of an old flint-look rnuaket." " Spoken like a eoldier'i daughter," <iuotb be ; " aod as to bow ? ' " Tikee you to lougto go off," she laid kindly. At 1 15 a. m. tbe portoullii (ell with a clang, tbe draw bri Jge wae rained, aud tin oatitle *lept. Away in tbe starlit dmtauoe a xood knight tramped wearily io the wake u( tbe lat oar, bicb bad called two boon ago, and bitterly reproached bimeelf for not thinking to tell tbe haughty baron 1 * daughter that her joke wai too awfully premature, beoaune muikete weren't goiug to be invented (or nearly 100 yearn. Jlrooklyn Eaglt. A famine is in tbe land, uot of food, but o( vessel* to put food io. Some lay the production is short, otberi that tbe low price of BUgars havo luduoed more fruit bottling tban ordinary. At all event*, fruit j *rs are very oaroe ; in (act, quart* are uot to be bad aud have advauoed in price very materially. It may be u*e(ul to onr reader* to know that tbe reliable and well -assorted lloane Furnishing Store, No. '0 KiLif street west, is the El DoraJj lor theee goode now. A Hi pound rqutib is cue o( the attraafoui of Walla Walla, Washington Territory. THE HUMOROUS JOURNALISTS OF AMERICA. fco I h, . Arc ...id Wkal I h. T n The only two old newspaper bumoriitt who have beld their own before tbe public are C. B. Lawis. o( tbe Detroit free 1'rtu, and Uubert J. Buidette, of the Burhugton 11 irk, y. Lewi* u a veritable prodigy. Ue baa written constantly (or ten yean, and be bat not weakened io the) leut Burdette doee uot writs M much, but he bse improved, and be has yet to do tbe best work of bis life. We believe Burdette is drifting toward verse- making ; it tbi* be true we may look for some exqjiaite work at bin baud* after be ban learued tbe dif- ferenoe between a ipoudee aod dactyl, and is brave enough to put hi* thoughts iolo rhyme. Tbe foolish (ear o( being laughed at has aborted mauy abrautidil poem Of tbe more recent humorists, tbe best are Joel C. Harris, E. W. Nye aod Upie Keed. Nye i> tue most popular, but Heed is undoubtedly the most verutile. Harri' work i* simply perfect in its way, but tbe ftoi taat it is largely oounaed to dialect ketches prescribes tbe extent o( IM popu- larity, and tbi extent of popularity will, we believe, diminish year by year. Jsrne* Wbitoomb K.ley i* beyond all question the beet of our uuiuorou* poet*. Thorns* B Cor) H tol. of the New York Uontiny Jounul. is the 010*1 prouiuing of tbe young verse- writers, and be is undeniably tne most prolific and most fashionable ; it is hard to determine as .0 tbe versatility of his bumor, a* his verses bavs hitheito been wholly oonfiued within the limit* o( euuii oality". When we eome to consider the demand for bumor wmob exi*U in Ibis country. we >r* atnaxed to find that there are so (ew writers capable of answering that demand. Il it ooujplaioed that the humorist write* him self out. but we do not believe il ueoestarily follow* that because oue hi* a t ilent be must exhaust that talent in two, five it leu years. We do not see why that talent should not endure a li(e -time. But it must be nursed and (oilered and cultivated aud improved. Tbe trouble with the mversge writer-be he humorously inclined or not is that he spends tbe principal o( hi* ability instead o( husbanding that i.-iooipal and subsisting upon tbe interest. 1'ne graveyards of jiur- ualiHiii are full o( inulleotual paupers- thoae wbo bad all that KSJUIUS c mid give a man but wbo fuchshly and exlravagmlly lavished meir wealth of brilliancy, wilb no thought ot tie professional to-morrow, till they (ouud themaelve* suddenly bankrupt aud benighted and object* o( universal ooujpassiou. t.utj<n( bifid. II.... . . maalrf 1 . *JrrH. Mr. Stanley ha* with him his favorite servant, Ddalla, a slim Somali c( .':< picked up at Aden, who has acted at bis confidential attendant for tbe lar.t five or MX years, says tbe P*U 3J"' Oatrttt. Na one oould tail to be attracted by bis origLt intelligent (aoe, bis gsnial tmile and hi. auswers to some plsasatt badinage which hi* master exchanged with him at luncheon hhowed a *ui|> rising readiness and grasp. With tbe variouipoiuta o( tbe Congo ques- tion he i* thorougnly conversant, express- ing hi* opinion* with much decision ; o( De Brazil, o( tbe mi*ionariee. of the Portuguese and so on. Tbe length of tbe Congo, from Leopoldville to Banana Point. bs is known, aud wbsn be appear* *t a station be i* at once recognised as tbs repre- sentative of Mr. Stanley, a* whose aaibu- ssdor in advance he often act*. In (act Dual!* is a diplomatist of consummate tact, which doe* credit to his teaching. Bie Kuglun is wonderfully good, and at prmteut be is acquiring tbe art of writing. Uualla is getting whiter every day, ^ Do you use Pear's soap, Uualla? " asked Mr Stanley, laughing out. Doawk had nnt tried it* virtue*. Tbi* is not hie first vim to London ; though it possesses: great attraction* (or him, I am afraid he prefer* tbe gayeties o( Paris. Dualla is gulling bomemok. and is going back to Aden, (or a time at least, W friends. " Uaella thinks the white girls very pretty, but I know there i* a duaky Bou<*li maiden lu the case. eb, Uualli ? " l)u*U* bluhed, laughed and beat a basSy retreat. That be bae (ailh in England is evident (rom the (sot that out o( the taiO he bat saved out f his wsges of I'M) a year he be* invested l -' ' in con- sols Tbe odd 100 be bat spent in pre- *enu (or bis friends, like the thoughtful fellow be is. An i i. . i . i. i ..... i. i.lrl. M. Arago, Dr. Oboist and M. Victor Meunierare re*|n*ible for the following extraordinary aooount of an electric girl Tbe girl, a peasant of IS, otlled Augelique Ccttio. was, M. Meunier tell* us in bis weekly scientific article, working in a tao lory, when a small table next to ber was violently upset without ostensible cause. Subni'iJently, in the preaenoe of M Meunier, she sat on a ohair beld by several people, when tbe chair was burled from their band*. Tbi* wat) tried mar* tbau once, with like results, tbe chair being in one case broken when it* holders were strong enough not to let it go. When isola- tion (rom the ground was produced by glass none of these effrote occurred. The only disconi(orl which the pirl ever feels in a pain in the hollow of tbe elbow. Before a commission ot engineers none of these experiments succeeded, but itis alleged in explanation t tat tbe electric properties of her system have through repeated dis- charge* lost their force aod finally become exhausted. Pall ila Oatelte. roil I-H-<I>I I -ti r\.i< ari..l.illl. ! I I. irr I xp'uul pi u Talttrrs, ai Uoiu. BB*I A bt.s. Lird Coleridge, at tbe Irvine bacqiet at Bt. James' Hall, be(ore our |> ipular trage dlan weut to America, inliuiatsd that an after-dinnertpeeob " oontiatedof platitudes ud anecdotes ; ' aud I remember bearing Mr. JsuiuaK Lowell, poet, humorist, and American Minuter at tbe Court of St. .1 nines, nay that if luddonly called upon (ter dinner to i-pjak, hi* mind wa* more a leu* a blank, but that on the way home from the feast be thought of ever to man) stood things he would like t j bave said. I'his implied a lack ot ready wit. but I fancy Mr. Jame* U. Lowell did himself an injustice by tbi* confession, as his speeches Usually bave an impromptu air aud abound in point and iotereet. Charles Uiokeus wa* an admirable after dinner apeaker, but I bave no doubt be knew tolerably well before-hand what be waa to talk about, aud nmoe tbe lamented death of Boz 11 I fancy George Augusta* bala bear* away tbe palm. Wbeu tbi* uoiabw journalist rise*, poises his obin in tbe air, roll* bis dark eyes upvard aud sends out bis clear metallic ohtml notes, one feels an assurance that a clever speech in forthcom- ing, delivered with fluent ease and (elicit > o( tipreasiou. 1 once beard a noble lord, wbo very (nq'ieutly makes excellent peecbes in tbe I'pper Uoune, declare that tie would part witn hull uf hi* worldly |x*es*ions if be oould roll off a upvccta *itu tue facility o( O A. 8. Tbis may bave been a IMOH de purler, but it oertaiuly implies a large measure o( admiration (or the oratorial ability of our prince o( jour ualiits. To my mind the most wonderful Hpeaker in tbe world is Henry Ward Beecher, tbe celebrated Brooklyn divine. II* can (peak al any time, at any place aud on any *ub joct. !!: pyiotrchnic brain, iooesaauily wblziiug aud ahirlisg, Hhoot* uut tbuu sands ot brigbt thought*, which be readily clothes in moel musical and expressive lan- guage. Tbe worst speaker I ever beard i* li)iug " Buuoicault, wbo, though a capable Irisui jiubdisu aud adapter o( French play*, boggles and stammer*, hesitates aud trips when be rises to revpoud," aud resumes his sest without having produced the slighter t effect, exoept that of disappoint uienl. Ou tbe whole I tumk tbe Americans are more telling alt -r dinner speakers than tbe English. There U Daniel Djugherly, the eminent advocate of I'niladelphia ; Sunset Cox, Oakley Ball, Beu Duller and Cbaunoey U. Depew, whose names are well known on this side ot to* ocean, and who, when tbey get on their legs, usually eorrusoate to tbe edification of tueir beartra. Uote<tr,t Paul m WM Unit. N*)t a !> Itrsllsl. New York Mur . A Orand street deutiMt wae recently asked by oue of L.i lady patient* if be *ould make a set ot false teeth (or ber dog, wbo. being old, had lost his own. Sue sail she was willing Io bave tbe cxuerirneLl made on ber darling, whoa* digekluu wa* now greatly impaired, aod that many other people be knew would be glad to bave their pets absent teeth replaced if her dog's set wa* a success. The dentist declined to try. Tbe big stone tower of tbe Philadelphia, public buildiutf, uow in prooeita o( oonmrun- tion, will be finished by the end of and will then be 310 feet high. From that eluvati MI tue iron work commences aud kopn I'.i'i teet higher, until the crown of \Villi*in 1'ouu'n hat, tbe height of J.IJ teet, i* reached. Tbe crowning pieoe in tbe circle (ormiog tbe lower part o( tbe tower is a single *tou* weighing 31 tons. II.. It,:.- *>l 'I...I. I .. I > II... The cardinal objection against the lighter literature of tbe present day is it* lack of sincerity. 1 jruu is regarded a* of more importance than subslanoe , a pretty external drapery i* used to ornament a worthies)*) manikin, and when tbe reader ex|>*ots flesh aud blood he i* confronted wud wood. Tbe art which ibould conceal ail U only art mads coarse by artificiality . in inartistic niggling at petty detail* . a oommouplaoe attempt to catalogue a aeries of readily observed surtaoe phenomena, aud to neglect tbe vital soul beueatb. False art has triumphed over nature ; tbe morgue has usurped the place ot tje arena, aud literature baa sunk to tbe low level ot busying itself with trirle* ; wilb drawing it* pictures from the drenouiaker*' and mil liners' dead models, elaborating tbe msig uinoant, apHhsosizing tbe ridiculous, aud then olaiuuing (or its iliff j tinted, artiluial vmoed manikin* tbe reward that is due to living men and women whom It so often sively caricature*.- -Botton Ututttt, Ka>r *>l i ,,.......,, H'jU Strrrt fitm Oue of the late (allures iu N inborn Michigan wai that o( a retail dealer in grindstones liabilities, S.I ;i'.J 25 ; assets, 1 1. -161 IM. Ill* expla uatioua were all ready tor tbe Drat oaii'r 11 You see, I was carrying a k.rk . ' grindstones, all si/ , all of 'em provided with holes in tue oautre." Ysm." Tbe overproduotioo drpressed tbe mar- ket and sent down price*." Exactly." " While tbe general deprcMiun in all kindsof business induced farmers to sharpen thtir l >ole on stone wall* and put off in veil ing in grindstones." " Just so." 11 Aud. to add to the reet, rumor*) ot a European oooiplioatioo, the low price of wheat aud tbe obolera excitement weakened the market until grindstones hadn't a ghost of a show." TOBY Island, off which tue British gun boat Wasp wa* wrecked and lifty two person* drowned, on tbe -Mrd inst, lies off Horn bead, a bold promontory whiob rises some MOO (eel above tbe sea on Ihe north west coast o( Donegal. It is opposite the inlet known a* MoBwyoe'i Gun Cove, wbiob derive* its name (rom a curious cavern scooped out of the inuntely bard traprock by tbe fury of the waves, which rush past Tory Island to break on tbe mainland cost. Into Ibis cavern tbe surge ruihes with extreme violence, producing duriug a itorm a roar wbiob in earlier day* was described as louder tban a discharge ot artillery. Ot late yearn, however, the sea bat worn tie cave so wide that tbe report o( MoHwyue't Oun ii greatly diminished. Tory Inland liis about seven mileenortbweito( the cove. It is some three tuile* long (rotu northwest to >iuU ail, but quite narrow, and it* iborei are deeply indented by tbe wave*. In old lime* it bad a considerable population drawn there by tbe security affnd -d by its isolation iu the stormy sea. Tbe ruiu* ol dwellings, churches aud oronMi are (ound buried- deep iu tbe sand. A round tower also atteitt* the ancient importance o( tbe plaoe. but st present the place has very (ew inhabitant*. There is a lighthouse on the Hlaud, with a tower 01 fet high. 11*1: (eel above the> sea. Tbe Wa*p wss a mearn lunboat of P.". i >tis aud 470 horse-power. She carried tour guns, and was employed iu particular service. According to tbe latest navy list that we bave *eeu, the officers of tbe ill fated vessel ware Lieu- tenant aud C<mitu vuier John 1>. Niohulls and Lieul Frederick A. Warden, ; Eight littleiiirls in. Port Cbetter.N V .put the country st large to shame by organ/. ing a fair (or the benefit of the Bartho.di statue fund which netted I '.'00. l-l>rlf I X. I OK A H >! Kl "" ' Waa- Ne < ..s>.r HrHsarkaMc lacMr*ii-Vr*sa Uriel |*> j... It i* not often that a man larvivs* to see the preparations (or bis own (uusral, out auob happened to Herbert Cannon, a son of Dr Cannon, of Yarker. Tbe young man, wbo is clerking for John A. Griffith at Bbarbol Lake, waa taken 01 aud bis lather weut out to visit him, aud tese- graphed home to bis mother be was better ; out through some error in transmitting il was in de lo read that be was dead. Tbe motaer and relatives al Yarker were nearly frantic with grie(. A B lx>m wa* oast over the village, relative* (rom distant places were summoned, the church was draped with kiudly baud* and (rieud*. aud a large number o( neighbor* oame to meet the corpse on tbe arrival ot tbe train at darrowsiuith. But they were most agreeably disappointed, (or tbe first person lo stap oft tbe train waa Dr. Cannon, wbo imparted the cheering intelligence that hi* ion wai much belter. Tbe joy of tbe mother wai a* overpowering as ber despondency wa* a abort time previously. One individual remarked ivtto face " drat tbim operators anyway." Am^iton Ktu-i. !' .... i ! *,.... Move* incessantly tbe most buoyant to day may be loaded djwu by ad varsity to- morrow. Oae peculiarity of that famous alleviaiir of human suffering Putuam'* I'aiulessCorn Extractor, i* tae (act that in spite of hundred* o( imitation* aud substi tutes it has retained its \iux in tbe very (rout rank as a remedy (or corns. Tbi* must ever be the case aa every person wbo bas used it t entities that il i* [rouupi, pain- less and certain -three grand eaaential* which, when combined, an is the case with 1'uluam's Palules* Corn Extractor insures a sure pop corn our*. Hjld everywhere. A Peril novelty is a rnagni(ying (an. Two stick* are bored aud tbe bole* filled with small leune* ot tbe lioest crystal. Tbe wearer covers her eyes with the (an aud UMC* the sue/, an an opera glass. i ....I...... ii.. ii Keai lbi carefully. If you or any frisud are suffering Irouu any kiud of pain, internal, local or external, try Poison s NKH. u iv the sure pop pain ours. Nervi Hue i* one of tbe most elegant oombioatioo* ever offered to" tbe public (or the relie( of pain. Pleasaut to take, power(ul in effect, sure in results, and cheap because the strongest, purest and most certain pain remedy iu the world. You can test tni* great remedy by going to a drug store aud buying a 10 cent sample buttle. Try il at once. Marion Crawford, the American novelist, will marry a daugbur of C'jl. Berdan, tne inventor, in October. I>r. H. B. Briltan says: "At a rule phvHioians do not by tneir professional methods build up tbe female constitution, and tbey scl Jom cure the diseases to which it is always liable in our variable climate aod under our imperfect oiviluuiuu. Special remedies are often required to restore organic harmony add to strengthen the enfeebled powers of womanhood, and (or moil of these we are indebted to persons outside of the medical profession. Among tbs very best of thene remedies aaign a promiueti place to Mrs. I'mkbam'a Vegetable Compound. Ikai Was WBJUI He waist. " O Mr. Strut I ' exclaimed Miss Maiden blush, meeting the leading man al tbe Boudoir Theatre. " I ve got a oomplimeot for you -a splendid one. too. I'uole Frank saw you in tbe new piece last night." Strut-" How did be like my assump tion " Mist Miidenblush "last'* just what I' uole Frank said. lie said il wa* ths greatest piece of assumption he ever wit Strut" H'm. Glad to have met yon, Miss Maidenbluih. GjoU bye." liotton Tranttnpt. .1 C i.... : : " It has become so common to begin an article, iu an elegant, interesting style, " Then run it into some advertisement that we avoid all suob. And simply call attention to tb* merits of Bop Bitters in as plaio, honest terms as possible, " To induce people " To give them a*r trial, which to prove* tbeir value that tbey will never use any thing else." ' THK ItEMEUT so favorably noticed In all tb* papers. KeiiKioai and secular. Is lUvmK a larg* sals, and i* supplanting all otht'r mediums*. Tbsrs is in' denyinf the virtue* of tbe Hop plain, u I tile proprietors of it.ip Hitlers have ahown gr*at ahrvw.lues* aod ability " In cuuHHiumlmu a medicine whose virtues are so palpauls tuevsrv ouesob**rvaiion i>,.i -i. . in. f "No I Sbe lingered and suffered long, pining away all tbe tme for years," Tbe doctors doing ber no good ;" " Aud a* last wae cured by this IIop Bitters th papers say so much abeut." lodted! I-ideed!'" How thankful we sbouldj.be (or that medicine." A Ii .1..'. . - li.. . - Eleven yean our daughter eutlered ou bed of misery, From a oomplication of kidney, liver, rehumalio trouble aud Nervous debility, ' I'uuder tbe oare of tua best physicians, NY bo gave her disease various names, 11 But no relief, " Aud now she it restored to us m good health by a*) simple a remedy as Hop Hit- ter*, tbat we had sbunuedfor years before using it." TIIK PAUKNTS. I ..I.. . Is ...,11114 \\ . " My daughters say : 11 i* much better father 1* iinoe he used Hup Hitter*." 11 110 in gutting well after bin long suffer- ing from a disease declared luourable." Aud we are so glad that he used your Uif-era." A LADI of Ulioa, N. Y. KSBTNon* genuine without a bunch ot grass ii , - mi Hi" wlut* latwi Shun all the vile poisououi stun* witli Hup" IK " tloiT iu their Trssl *>lrrcl*rs. roared tb* paying bier'* ' Look here ! as he jumped into tbe oashi*r ; s ctlije. and held out a newspaper with hi* thumb on the paragraph. "Look here! lias this bank any political influence '' "What'* the matter?" in<iiiir*d tbe cashier, turning piUe. "Tbi* paper is urging tb* annexation of Canada. Now bow are you gciog to top that?" " Let il alone," said the cashier with a resuming smile, as ht poked another pack age of bond* into the tail of nisooal. " Be (aithlul aod earnest in your attention to your dunes. Tbe bank diraoton will take care ot that annexation sobem*. What securities bavs we in stock on long loans?" Urake'i TruitUtri' I . .ubl. . si B Tlllll.o.lrr. New Yoik millionaire " Are tbe gi'U locked up (or the night, wife? " " Yes." " < )oaohman chained? " " Yes." " Has tbe patent butcher-catcher in the front yard been oiled ao that i: work* wsll ' " Yes." " WeU, w* might at well chloroform the gardener and go to sleep." < 'A lYisaajat. A 1 4>rr*l. A farmer sent bis boy to tbe " sogar bu*b " to look after tbe *p books**. Presently tbe boy returned. " How are tbey .' ' asked the farmer. " W well," the boy replied, "s-tome are b half (full, borne are (full, an' some are r-rannin' over. I g guess they'll a average 'bout (-full. A petition to test the Soctt Act in Not- folk ha* been filed. LYDIA VEGETABLE COMPOUND IS A POSITIVE CURF . I or all \\ .. MM vi. i: PUPI-U4T1UN.* IT an t. . i KE rtTHULT THE W'-arrroM . MktB r.'SI'I A1NT-V All. tU kKlAS TM.lt Ml. RA, FLABlltTt N AV :> I'l.t EKATI<>*. K I M I N . A N II Pl| IM.A. ErNT. ANT- THE . "N^rgrws'T M-INAL WEAK^ .M. t nun. 'IAKLI AUAFTID TO TaJ r >.r l.irB. * s * s * * ^<e 1 r M i !>!-! %r ANI, r\rn. Trv.iK.4 rtioll Tits * r \ r Tu B ( * \s F U'.l - 111 M'lk- TIICKXUit-HKi &ET> r * * * * i Ir i;r"ir KIITNF.. Fi ATI IE*. T. nsirraiTrs " > r. W "a-! M >. n IT crsas Buurnss, UKAIM A. HE. Nrll> ' - l'l...-TKT|..N. t.l NrliAI. 1>SIUTT.' 1M'KK ! N AM" I M >l..f-T I 'N S * S * e THAT rrrt IN., or KKIIUN.. ! ''n. AM' IU> K > lit. I- Al 1 > rrltHA<IESn.T i I UEli Bl ITN ! .( , , ' S * S * IT ll.l. AT AI.I. Tlr AN;. : NHEB, ALX riSfCSf- - A. I IN II HIS i\l KITH TUE LAWS THAT ^ THE riSAIS tT. s * s * *> sTlT 1-1 l.l-.-r :. -til.KI.V F-.KTIIE I.E.iITlAT H.MIV -if Kf [ K * . r I-AIN. AXtt TUAT IT 1-T- M I II I Al- T. >'. Til ANI tt|> LAlilE* . AN ..1 \fi V 1I-1IF1 - , * , , S ' H THE tlK* 'T Kl.'N.i > .l-UAIVn US Ellltl.lt E\ THIS SSIIEDT I- I Nl 1U'A-E|.. S S M.II r.. viMctiAira VEHLTABLK (vm\>iin> s* i.. t i .1 >l Imn. Maw PTKW (L Ml buttles tat Sa. Sotd of uU tlntwlsls. H.-SI by nuAll. iwvUtfs paid, ia forwi <<f I 1 !.!- <>r I. *-nfi-s on rvn^pt <>f prtiv M aboriN Mr*. llnlhani ".luhl. to l|. A.ih >lll 1^ SUII..1 m>Ma !.! . ...Unit damp. Ixttrrs .v. B n.h-ntully aiwvnvL v ramllr .brxiM h l" i 1 IMCIIA I'll ' r ths Uwr. .N*nts i* r '- i U. t N. l . 41 - 30 DAYS 9 TRIAL ,,,.. IT.tt i 1.I.TAU 1 1'KIT nn.l i-thrl KISVTSI.- i Arniivus B r.. .],. ,, n i l>n>' T-|l TX> \ XU OR Ol I), wnti r^ uffiT IIK rr..m NEHI i s I'mniri U r v rTAtrrr. u .-TIN, i \VrAKNrwtKS. sntt all thtis* lt r>K*..i. RATCBB. nsotttBi imm AVI (THEa i'lfsES. SpNly r^ll.'f sn.l , - n st. .ratlin u> HEALTH Viu. K and lUBtoo*> . .1 .T:iD. Si-ti.l si onct) fur Illustrated rui.|.ii:.'i rrw. A.l.li^ss Voltaic BMt Co.. Marshall. Mich. I CURE FITS! s f.m. sad tasa b.* thm . .' I >' I I I V i . 1 1 K ,-r. th. wo" ... An t l .- M. - *f sif I; f..r ttl*. IdfSssIN i. I.I s/pissrisx. >! X- Ml > Itl ! I III- TIIV Voiyrn ic KELT Co., of Marshall. Mleh. ofTur KI sun I shsjtresMtasssI HLKITO-VOLTU.IO i I (lior KI.KITHI. ArpLiANt SB ou tria fi.r chlrty 'U- . <uuij or "tli aftllolSKl wuli nurv ';- --..ifviul-.tf an I roan hmxl. a Q.I all aln.lrvl tr'.uMrt Alst> fur rlisa mattiti, uura i-i*. |raly>is ami manf olber qiusass C.>tu|>leKi rnttiration tu bsalth. Tini.r ami inanh.n>l KnratiUi*>l. No risk Is incurred as thirty dats (rial is ailuwsxl. Write tbeni one* fur Illtmtratwl p*mphlMtrea EYE. EAR AND THROAT. DR. 0. 8. BYF.R80N, L. B. 0. P. B. K.. Lecturer on the Rye, (Car an. I Throat Trinity U<xlioal IV 'Urge, Turoula Oenllsna Aunst tu Hit Toronto Ueneral Hoi . Cluiu-Al as-istsvui Hoyal Ljou.lnu Oplitbalmle .1 ttooreAskl'i ami Usotrml Loodoa Throat an I far Hipltal. S17 Cliiirah Hlreel ..,*.. i. ,. I- CMru * *. v to sser'o a nusiu** y B.loeatioa or Biwiovrtau PD * nianitilp al Iba HPHNOIB , l MN HUHIN1M c JL.I.SU MMu Olrrolan li>