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rr i v vcujvv p 12 weekender saturday may 24 1997 i t gladhanding pols pay a price when pounding the pavement the candidate standing smilingly at the front door must have thought he had stumbled across a couple of expatriates from the planet bob only minutes before we had watched from our window and snickered as the eager wouldbe politician struck gold upon turning to walk up the driveway of our neighbors across the street he was greeted by a group of some six or so first time voters one held an infant while a puppy dog watched curiously from below the candidate stopped just short of kissing the baby and shaking hands with the hound then proceeded to engage the group in what appeared to be a most cheery conversation but when he got to our door he was immedi ately greeted by my wife susans hearty query of youre not from the rhinoceros party are you susan it must be understood believes in making unsolicited callers pay for the privilege she once replied to a supper time window washing tele phone sales pitch by telling the unwelcome huck ster in a straight faced and apparently convincing fashion that we have no windows in our house due to our being albinos with zero light tolerance the stumping candidate as it turned out had a good sense of humor susan who has dug out her old rhinoceros party button and is proudly wear ing it these days as a form of mild protest against this most peculiar of elections seemed to respect the fact that the candidate was able to break stride awhile and share the gag tories grits and ndp of days gone by they never promised instant fixes based on healthy moral living or yogic flying like some parties lying beyond the fringe today and unlike the very alive and well marxistleninist party of canada which is fielding a whopping 65 candi dates in the fast approaching mandate the rhinos never attempted to foist upon us a set of tried and failed ideas based on the philosophy of long gone european political extremists the rhinos knew no regional restrictions their refreshing solutions to the problems besetting this nation were as delightfully absurd out west as they were in the maritimes for instance back in from where i live for those who are too young or who have come the 1970s when the metric system was being to canada from abroad in recent decades the introduced to canada amid the protests of some rhinos offered a welcome distraction from the the rhinos proposed we also go to the european disposal of old set available phone orders accepted richmond hill ztt elgin mills wwihp major mackenzie scahborouch mzwmm modtattrvio 4560 hwy 7 4770181 10720 yonge st 5086190 osc jul 3 w sleep factory 3811 sheppard ave e 2935191 i we make any size mattress setup i free available i layaway hours monwed 106 pm thursfri 109 pm saturdays 106 pm sundays 114 pm bruce stapley way of driving on the left side of the road of course they suggested just as the new means of measuring everything from flour to baseball fields was being phased in a stage at a time in canada the same should apply to the highway switch con sequently we would begin with trucks only they advised the rhinos were also way ahead of their time when it came to recycling they always insisted their political plat forms be made of wood that way they reasoned they could be used again for something else after the election anyway we eventually bid our candi date adieu and bonne chance it seemed the thing to do given the way the national unity issue has risen to such prominence in this campaign and im quite sure that as he walked away he was given to reflect quizzically upon the strange diversity that characterizes the electorate in the riding i crfjmjh e a special section of the markham economist sun dedicated to young people coming thursday may 29 booking deadline tuesday may 27 contact your local sales representative at 2942200 help oncall inc we make time for you homemakers health care aids housekeepers companions and more 9054798097 personal and affordable outgrown your home office starting a new business we can help for more information call linda smith 905 8520181 y