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p ethe triaunfaukdavma36199 tuesday may 6 1997 vol 109 no 19 the tribune opinions sh send your letters to the editor to the address below editorial a fond farewell rather than an editorial this should be called thank- you you as a community of readers and writers have inspired me informed me trusted me and supported me a few of you have criticized me and challenged me too all this in a very public days work that has lasted 11 years arriving on your diverse doorsteps twice a week for 11 years has been a daunting privilege and a respon sibility sometimes the phone would start to ring the same day as your paper arrived it means the vital signs are strong we dont have to agree only to think journalism is a lot like standing in a dark room with a flashlight the more lights on the subject the greater the accuracy thats why your quotes and comments let ters and phone calls are valued and they keep editors like me on track the thought of steering this paper through the mil lennium with you was tempting but its time to pass along the editorial reins of this newspaper and of the economist sun my successor is andrew mair who has earned his stripes with us for nearly a decade happily this has nothing to do with any health chal lenge the decision came after nearly a year of deliber ating im planning to spend summer in the hammock gather speed and see what opportunities present them selves this fall its a freefall into freedom and frankly its taking a little courage to be just myself and not your collective voice jo ann stevenson people will really think were cookie in stouffville the proof is in the cook ie when it comes to electiens ive got one rule elections must be wrapped sealed and delivered in fun when the federal election was called 10 days ago i expected stouffville to heat up straight away i waited and wait ed and waited some more nobody struck up the band the bells didnt ring the whistles didnt blow and the old fire truck didnt rip through town with its siren blaring i started to have evil thoughtsid sac rifice my first bom to see a bareknuck le fist fight between the grits and the tories id throw in my other four kids to see the reform party and the new democrats arm wrestle on main street id offer up my father my brother and 1 9 cousins to see the bloc get into a pid dling match with the natural law party nothing helped instead of fun i wit nessed four seriousminded individuals each worried about the state of the nation come forward to get themselves picked as federal candidates for their respective political parties and without much fanfare theyre going door-to- off the record joan ransberry door in search of votes important yes fun no realizing this i did what i do well i sulked nobody cared so i gave it up and went to my favorite outof the office eatery and bought a cookie thats when it hit me- if i could con vince heritage ice cream parlor and more time with sock drawer needed that was the week that was all right ellen came out of the closet and tvo broadcast a program on female bodily functions one reason i didnt watch the former was because i had never heard of her until a couple of months ago when she became world famous for being possibly gay and maybe willing to declare her sexual preference on network tv the other reason was i was in the throes of reading a really good book happy though i am for ellen and others who think they have found their soul mate of either official gender i must confess i am not especially inter ested in the private passions of the rich and famous or indeed of those of any one with whom i am not personally acquainted presumably however abc thought it was doing a brave and noble thing although its affiliates didnt let that get in the way of making a quick buck according to cbc radios world news in which ellens gaynesswas judged to be of international import second only to the manitoba flood dis aster some stations charged three times the going rate for anyone who adver tised in the great closet clearance episode kates corner kate oilderdale it seems to me that folks are gay or straight because they- were bom that way and that being gay is not some thing to be proud or ashamed of its just a fact of a persons life like being tall or short still it is one way to be get intoa community which is where its at in the 1990s think about it when was the last time you heard tell of a spokesperson representing the heterosexual commu nity heterosexuality is not only uncoql its terribly fiveminutesago with even the most rabidly fundamen tal fundamentalist giving it his or her diehard approval preston manning roseanne skokes and the former florida orange juice lady have all made it abundantly clear that they have no problem whatsoever with heterosexuality which is a bit of a drag for those of us who happen through natural inclination to embrace this particular lifestyle there are many adjectives you could use to describe preston manning but hip is certainly not among them still all of this pales in comparison with the current drive to bring menstru ation out of the closet as a member of the female community i have never been offended by the lack of publicity accorded this basic but necessary func tion and certainly dont consider it the basis for great art or indepth analysis on tv thus i managed to avoid the ground breaking television documentary which encompassed such delights as an art exhibition entitled menstruation bathroom and a country and western soundtrack which included a song on the same topic i was further persuaded not to watch after the program was warmly recommended by michele landsberg in the star call me a traitor to the sisterhood but suddenly cleaning out my sock drawer seemed like a great way to spend the evening and if im in denial im not planning to come out of that particular closet anytime soon i conclude this weeks sermon with a quote from a button seen in london england in 1982 gay whales against the bomb lets hear it for the gay whale community deli owners ross and wendy cowie to be my partners in crime maybe id have some fun after all wendy and ross agreed and stouf- fvilles cookie election was bom the cowies selected their top four best selling homemade cookies and des ignated a political party to each believe me besides being very nice people ross and wendy are the king and queen of cookies their cookies are out of this world heres the lineup in the cookie elec tion the reform party is a chocolate peanut butter the liberal is oatmeal raisin the new democrats are chocolate chip and the progressive conservatives are white chocolate macadamias the cowies picked a cookie to repre sent the quebec separatists drop into the main street parlor and see the bloc cookie to add to the spirit the heritage ice cream parlor has been decorated in canada colors balloons and flags are compliments of that great canadian linda sargeant of lindys florist each of the local political parties donated election campaign posters its simple buy a cookie cast a vote cookie salesvotes will be recorded daily on a blackboard if you want an uptodate on whos winning read the tribune on tuesday thursday or satur day election bulletin just in the cookie election is working its magicthere is life in stouffville oak ridges pc candidate john andersen has just announced hell host a party at his stouffville headquarters on main street on saturday from 3 to 6 pm liberal bryon wilfert and ndp wynne hartviksen are door knocking in stouf fville while reform party candidate edward sarafian has opened his office in on woodbine avenue in gormlcy above sams restaurant most impor tant the cookies are coming out of the oven in great numbers stouffville tribune patricia pappas publisher andrew mair editorinchief alan shackleton editor debra weller director of advertising mike rogerson retail advertising manager stacey allen classified manager barry goodyear director of distribution vivian oneil business manager pamela nichols operations manager bmit 6402100 1 retail 9056402100 classified 905 6402874 6244 main st stouffville out r -i-i- m m i end distribution group of comrau- allfrton nwlrfcourltr oirrio advmch bnmiitoo guirduo fntlinnnifwlu kjirh fvir coke guardian orortolown iniie- pendenlacton frc pm letters policy the tribune welcomes your letters to the editor please keep letters to no more than 300 words note that letters may be edited for space libel spelling grammar while we endeavor to print as many letters as possible we regret that not all letters may be printed