1o tho examiner Wednesday Fob 1979 Ann Lgnders Better to sh0p at other store Dear Friend Ive seen few letters in your column on shoplifting There are signs allover the stores saying Shoplifters Will Be Prosecuted etc have never done it in my life but some of the saleswomen lve been running into lately are putting ideas into my head went to buy getwell card at wellknown Detroit store You wouldnt believe what had to go through to get some one to take my money Saleslady said Sorry dear lm going on break Go tojewelry Saleslady at jewelry said My key is only for jew elry Go to Candy andy looked down her nose at me and snapped dont take cards Youll have to wait until comes back from her break looked her straight in the eye and said You know it would be lot easier tojust steal the card She shot back Go ahead Everyone else does What do you make of this Ant Landers Tempted Dear Tempted The next time you are tempted look at one of those signs that says Shoplifters Will Be liosecuted and ask yourself what makes better sense to go to another store where hopefully the service is better or to give in to your anger and risk being arrested Dear Ann Landers When my two children were five and six years old my wife and were divorced My exwife then remarried and moved away have had no contact with them for it years was not granted visitation rights so gave the children up to be adopted by their new father have since remarried but unfortunately my wife and never had children of our own We would like to have my two come to visit us How dol go about it After all AM their realfather Dolhave any rights lonesoiiielad III Dad According to law you have no rights If you want to reenter the lives of your children you will have to throw yourself on the mercy of your former wife and her husband If they are opposed to the idea you can hire lawyer and fight them doubt that such move would promote much good will with your children however nor do think youd win the suit The things you left our of your letter tell me almost as much as whats in it Dear Ann Landers Our son informed his father and me just last week that his girlfriend is pregnant small church wedding is planned six weeks from now Aftar the ceremony there will be reception spoke with my future daughterinlaw and she thinks she is in her third month but she isnt sure Her parents know about it and are as surprised and disappointsii as we are Here is the question we need answered by an unbiased third party Should tell the people we invite about the girls con dition She is sure to be showing and dont want anyone whispering behind my back want to do the right thing What is it IIl Dear Say nothing The information probably was given to you in confidence and you should keep it to yourself If the bride looks pregnant and people whisper hold your head up and carry on with dignity You owe no explanations or apologies ti Kentucky oii Pollys Pointers Baking soda removes odor DEAR POLLY My vinyl recliner has perspira tion odor that have not been able to remove with bathroom cleaners or vinyl cleaners do hope someone knows of way to remove this odor RUBY DEAR RUBY Sprinkle baking soda on damp sponge rub the chair and then wipe off with clean moist sponge If this does not do it try sponglng with rubbing alcohol but do test effect on your vinyl first POLLY Putting socks on squirming youngster can be real job used to lay my children down on their stomachs and then put their socks on Sometimes the socks go on easier if they do squirm in this position MRS SJS Ross Erma Fox would like to invite you to their lst Anniversary Celebration Sunday February Danger signals listed for credit users MONCION NB CP For many consumers the avail ability of easy credit is merely convenience but for grow ing number it signifies ride to bankruptcy To help those having trouble managing credit the provincial onsumers Bureau has outlined the key danger signals credit users should recognize The list suggests consumers should be concerned if they are depending on extra in come bonuses overtime moonlighting to pay their regular expenses Others who should stop and think about their financial situ ation include rlhe person who cant figure out where his money goes He doesnt think he spends foolishly but theres nothing to show for his outlay llie person who keeps put these steps are not enough you should contact your creditors and explain the situation to them You may be able to refinance your debts over longer period by paying smaller monthly in stalment New Brunswickers have one further alternative in the face of serious debt An amendment to the prov inces Bankruptcy Act allows the bankruptcy officer to set up partialpaymentofdebt sys tem Under this system the debtor is given strict budget on which to live and his salary is handled by trustee who pays the creditors specified amount of the payment owed After specified length of time usually three years the debtor is discharged from any remaining debt Hes 26 shes 38 Older womens experience tolerance attract TORONTO CP Rick Copple says his parents freaked out when he married Joan woman 12 years his senior However Rick 26 and Joan 38 didnt give their age differ ence second thought until they broke the news to their friends and relatives didnt realize it could be problem until we saw everyone elses reaction says Rick Joan says was only 12 years younger than his mother and that just did it We went to intrtxiuce ourselves as couple and they were very nice and never said anything to me But they dragged Rick over the coals Ricks friends gave dire warnings and Joans friends pointed out all the possessions and comforts she would be los ing with younger man GROWING TREND However the trend towards older women choosing much younger man for her partner is on the increase and recently both Canadian and American filmmakers have been capitals izing on it in Praise of Older Women and Moment By Moment star ring John Travolta and Lily Tomlin have lent credence to the changing mores Most of the men involved with older women re attracted by their greater experience and tolerance Experience comes into it lot Cogple says An older woman as more perspective and puts things into proportion You can share more balanced relationship He took on sudden responsi bility when he married Joan who has two children now aged 19 and 20 He is only six years older than the oldest daughter BIG RESPONSIBILITY My biggest responsibility was that was having an effect on growing children and was re sponsible for part of their fu ture he says ting off major home repairs or purchasing big items like household appliances lhe person who takes out new loans to repay old ones or gets extensions to lower pay ments and spread them over longer period lhe person who frequently uses overdrafts on his chequing account Ron irsenault bankruptcy officer attributes the major cause of growing number of debtridden New Brunswickcrs to lack of financial planning Reliance on second family income that suddenly fails cohol or psychological prob leiiis and lack of savings for hard times are the most frequent circumstances that bring individuals to his office The onsunier Bureau sug gests adhering to guidelines drawn up by tiwcn Byiiicrs of Cornell lnivcrsity to keep otit of debt Ollttl DEBTS These guidelines say instalment debts except your mortgage should total no more than 20 per cent of your takehonie pay in the average it shouldnt take more than year to pay off instalment debts except major ones like car loans but these should be balanced by your ability to pay off outstanding charge accounts within month or two You should have an emer gcncy fund of at least $500 to draw on Some researchers say you should routinely set aside 20 per cent of your animal pay for this fund The bureau says credit should be used only when ab solutely necessary and be kept as low as possible It says debts should be paid off quickly and persons should shop around for credit For persons unable 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