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ANW LANDERS - Aborigine Customs OK There -- Not Here Dear Ann Landers: I was of- fended by your cutting reply to the woman who wanted to be the sole breadwinner in the fam- ily while her husband kept house. You said she was "kooked up" and called oan 'Sir, Surely you know many people are unsuited for the roles which society decrees they must play. Some men don't belong in the business world and some women don't belong in the home. In Australia, for example, cer- tain aborigine tribes practise complete reversal of the roles as we know them. The women do the hunting, make the tribal de- cisions and run the family. The) men stay home, care for the children, do the cooking and| primp (like our women) so they! will be attractive to their wives.| According to. anthropolo-| gists they are reasonably con-| tent. Personally, I believe the lady who wrote will be happier (and so will her husband) if they do/ up your sister's marriage which is quite a different ball of wax, Move. You'll all be better off. Dear nders: The letter from the woman whose neigh- bor's child was cruel to her little puppy brought back memories. I hope that child's: mother will get busy before it's too late.- Parents need to instill in their children love and compassion for all living things. When our five sons were very young I taught them to treat pets lov- jingly. If I heard a squeal or a yip I picked up the furry crea- ture and snuggled him. Then I'd say "Nice kitty" or "Nice puppy" and guide the child's hand to pet the animal gently. For wonderful years we had stray cats and dogs on 'our porch from all over town. Our boys walked to school like shep- herds in the midst of a flock. At times I questioned the wisdom of teaching (for example when I had to wade through the flock to get to my clothes line) but I know now I was right. Today, each of our five sons is CHITD pS r eres GUIDANCE By GARRY C. MYERS, PhD As more and more parents with cultural advantages are desiring their children to suc- ceed well at school, there is a growing demand for tutors to give the lagging child special help. Nearly all parents of chil- dren of elementary school age might effectively give this spe- cial help themselves were they able to manage their emotions and keep calm and patient. As any mother who has tried to help her child with his les- sons knows, her human frailties often render her a poor helper. Some parents do more harm than good in this direction, though a rare few excel. So, as a rule, a stranger usu- ally makes a better tutor for a child than does either of his parents: and the child tutored may do better away from home n at home. Indeed, some persons with little or no train- ing at teaching, even high schoo] students, may have great success as tutors of elementary school children. Anybody who gives special help to a child in bringing up Parents Must Manage Enotions When Tutoring Lagging Child his arrears in any school sub- ject, whether a stranger with special skills or an unskilled neighbor or parent, needs to fol- low a few simple guide lines: Am I helping this child enjoy success? Is he gaining in hope that he can continue tc suc- ceed? Do I put myself in my imagination in his place and try to keep in mind how he feels about what he is trying to learn? Do I try to understand why he makes mistakes and re- peats them over and over, or do I think him just downright ornery? it is very important for the helping person to go back and back with the child lagging in|, Jus. aus So Sone ot. well, BHA wat its' meaning? Tf, for. example, he is in the fourth grade at school, can he read well only from a third grade reader, only from a sec- ond grade reader or only from a primer? Finding how easy the mater- ials or:steps must be for him to succeed, have him. start there. Then slowly, patieritly, lead him forward very gradu- Your temptation will be to have him come forward far faster than he js able. College students and others volunteering as tutors of cultur- ally deprived children need to follow like principles. STUMBLES ON WORDS Suppose you employ a tutor. for your third-grade child who is lagging at reading. The chances are that this tutor will have him practice at reading more materials of third grade difficulty. He flounders, stum- hiss over many words, fails to get Witch meaning "from what he reads and keeps on facing difficulties, rarely enjoying suc- cesses. How 'can he strive hopefully? If this tutor happens to be a third grade teacher, she may be all the more inclined to keep him working on third grade materials and to have him read from school readers. However, she may fortunately have worked out ways with her own schoolchildren to set thm at reading what they can read suc- cessfully. She also may have been finding for her children a variety of books and other read- ing matter which appeal to them and which does not seem babyish. A mother helping her lagging child at home may feel the need of trying to help him do at home just what he is supposed to do at school. She may feel warranted to do this to some degree, but if he is really to any subject till rock-bottom is) ~ discovered. WHAT'S WRONG? If the subject is arithmetic,| -- where in the learning of this! subject are the steps for which he has inadequate skils for suc- cess? In spelling, how many hard words can he spell cor- rectly? In reading, how easy must what he reads be in orde: Prettiost Christmas Parcels will come from EDNA ANN HATS - Dodrop in and see all the n store for you. Jewellery, gloves, purses and scarves. fine new fashions we have THE OSHAWA TIMES, Wednesday, December 1, 1965 27 Preparé Turkey With Care To Avoid Holiday Hazards. Don't let food poisoning ruinjand storing a holiday turkey your Christmas holiday. Instead,|properly, to avoid any hazard. follow these 'Suggestions from' Dressing must be handled, home economists at Macdonald|.44 consists of many small in- pieuite, GOP tur Preparing gredients such as bread crumbs, 8 seasonings, and fat. Thus, make good strides'for;-ard, she|chances for bacterial-growth.are| will also find some time each|great. Therefore, combine stuff- evening to win his willingness|ing ingredients just before cook- to read some, for example, fromjing time and make sure any sources much easier than his|pork being added has been well can be prepared the night be- fore, if refrigerated until used.) Stuff the turkey just before roasting. Otherwise, the warmth of the cavity could induce the growth of bacteria. Never par- tially cook a bird. The added warmth produced in the dress~ ing can also promote bacte' unless fully cooked to, kill the bacteria. 3° After the meal, remove alk stuffing from the bird. Wrap, separately in foil or waxed naper and refrigerate. It takes, too long for cold to penetrate a bird's cavity. Also refrigerate school boks. cooked. (The stuffing ingredients immediately, the broth, gravy» and remaining turkey. : to make her happy and you proud... see GIFTS what comes naturally and areja wonderful husband and father. | not concerned with what others|They are spected by their col- ---- = think.--Interested Reader Dear Interested: If these peo- ple lived in the Australian bush they would have no problem, but in Hartford if they changed roles they might well be considered pecullar. I entered no judgment as to whether it was right or wrong. I di@ say they are bound to be considered oddballs -- and be- lieve me, they would be. Dear Ann Landers I am a 20- year-old girl who lives with my married sister and her hus- band. I have a good job in a bank. My sister is wonderful to me but I hate her husband. He calls \leagues and deeply concerned with the lot of their fellow man. |The early teaching paid off.--) |Detroit Mother | ar Mother: What a heart-/ warming letter! Do you have a a snapshot of your boys walking "like shepherds in the midst of a flock?" I hope so! (And if you} ido, Td love to see it.) | | LENT BY DUTCH QUEEN | TORONTO (CP)--Queen Ju-| \liana of The Netherlands is lend-| ling a Mondrian painting to the} |Art Gallery of Toronto for al jcomprehensive exhibition of the} |Dutch artist's work next Febru-| ary. The show will be the first} my sister "stupid" and "'ignor-|)oanized in T P A - ganized in Toronto to travel ant." If he doesn't feel like 20-|\ahroad, to Philadelphia and The! ing out he makes her cancel| Hague. plans at the last minute. If he)----_ Buy Quality at Black's Shirts by Forsythe & Hathaway Colognes by Jade East & Canoe Sportswear by Jantzen Sweaters by Gino Paoli, Tony Day, Jay-Berma, Parker of Vienna Handsome TV Gowns Shoes by Sloter Hats by Dobbs : Cuff Link Sets styled for Black's Gloves & Vests See our Leather Counter EDNA ANN HATS Oshawa Shopping Centre Open Daily 9:30 «.m. to 9 p.m. Including Saturdays. Franklin Simon OSHAWA SHOPPING CENTRE wants to go out, she has to go, no matter how tired she is. My sister is a beautiful girl. If she left this ox she could marry a man who would treat her like a queen. The vice presi- dent of the bank has asked me questions about her. When I told her, she said, "Forget it. Bill is a good father. That means a lot to me." How can I save my sister from throwing away. her life on this! rat?--Standing By Dear Sis: If you were "'Stand- ing By" it would be lovely, but you are actively trying to break! People's 36 SIMCOE ST. 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