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The South Marysburgh Mirror Druella Acantha Malvina’s Column Gem for the Month: Housecleaning is about as much fun as hugging a cactus. # Definitions for today: Acquire — a chorus Benign — what you can’t wait to be when you’re eight years old Bulldozer — man who sleeps through political speeches Debate — what lures the fish Dogma — a puppy’s mother Gambit — a bite in the leg Kindred — fear of relatives Lapse — what a child gets when they sit down Livelihood — active gangster A mother was frustrated because her daughter kept kissing the bathroom mirror leaving a lipstick trail behind. Finally, after just having finished scrubbing the mirror, she found que In South Marysburgh Reduce stress and anxiety, find peace, connect with nature, deepen connection to self, learn energetic communication and much more. Looking for case study participants interested in experiencing Equine Therapy or simply to spend quality time with horses-whether it be grooming, leading or just hanging out. Case study cost $30 per session. Contact: freespiritholisticway@gmail.com or 613 503-5433 for more information. another kiss mark. She knew she had to find a solution. She called to her daughter and asked her if she knew where the toilet brush was as she needed to clean the mirror — again. She was satisfied she had cured her problem when she heard her daughter gagging. My idea of cleaning is to sweep the room with a glance. Differences between dogs and cats: 1. Dogs will bring your slippers or the newspaper. Cats might bring you a dead mouse. 2. Dogs will play frisbee with you all afternoon. Cats will take a three hour nap. 3. Dogs will sit, lie down and heel on command. Cats will smirk and walk away. 4. Dogs will listen to whatever you say to them. Cats will yawn and close their eyes. 5. Dogs will bark and wake you up if the house is on fire. Cats will quietly sneak out the back door. # How do you see your mother? Here’s how some see their’s. 4 years of age —- My mommy can do anything. 8 years of age —- My mom knows a lot! A whole lot! 14 years of age —- My mother doesn’t know everything. 18 years of age — Her? She’s way out of date. 25 years of age — Well, she might know a little bit about it. 35 years of age — Before we decide, let’s get mom’s opinion. 45 years of age — Wonder what mom would have thought of it. 65 years of age — Wish we could talk it over with mom. # A florist, a policeman and a politician all got their hair cut at the same barber. When they went to pay, the barber told them he was doing community service work this week and couldn’t accept pay. The next day, the barber received a doz- en roses from the florist and a dozen donuts from the police- man to show their appreciation. When the barber opened his door there were a dozen politicians waiting for their free hair- cut. # Exit Lines: 1. | don’t have gray hair. | have “wisdom highlights”. 2. My people skills are fine. It’s my tolerance to idiots that needs work. Copy & Advertising Deadline for The South Marysburgh Mirror is the 24th of each month Email: themirror@kos.net