haa ian, 4g -- PORT PERRY STAR -- Tuesday, June 26, 1984 editorial comments ONTARIO GLPARATE ay NOES CONGRATULATIONS ! IT TOOK NJ YEARS, BUT YOU FINALLY GRADUATED ! chatterbox by John B. McClelland Last Thursday was the first day of summer. For most people, it was a day to look forward to as summer in Canada beats the heck out of winter. But that's another story. I was not one of the multitude who looked forward with great anticipation to the first day of summer. I greeted June 21 with a sense of trepidation, even hoping that it would be cold and rainy so I could wear my overcoat. Now, why would anybody want to wear an overcoat on the first day of summer? To cover up the bulge, that's why. You see, | made an unpleasant discovery a few weeks ago. Standing in front of the bathroom mirror get- ting ready to lather up my chin for a morning shave, I found to my dismay that I am no longer mean and lean. Mean and grumpy most of the time. But lean? No way, baby. I had to admit that I'm overweight. Being overweight in the winter is no great problem. You just pile on the coats and sweaters and nobody knows the difference. But it's a different story in the summer. | mean I'd look damn silly walking down Queen Street in July wearing my favourite wool sweater and a down-filled parka. Nope, once summer rolls around, there's nowhere to hide that spare tire. It's there in full view for all to see. That's why I felt so uneasy on the first day of summer. North America has gone on a fitness binge. Canada now has more joggers that television sets. A lot of newspapers are growing rich running those full-page ads for health studios, the ones where boys and girls lift weights together and run around in skimpy little bathing suits. Carrot juice now out-sells whiskey as the national drink, with club soda on the rocks running a close second. The average 30 year old Canadian male is now almost in as good shape as that legendary 60 year old Swede. (I'd like to meet that guy some day). A few years ago, a sure sign of upper middle class affluence was a BMW and a Volvo station wagon ir the garage. Today, it's his and her matching ten-spe eds, made in France, of course. Yes, the whole continent has gone fitness crazy. Ex- cept me. | haven't lost my taste for ale. And I haven't given up my sinful penchant for late night ham and cheese sa ches: lots of butter, mayo, three slices of thick ham, two kinds of cheese and a dab of peanut butter just for flavour. No sir, you won't catch me drinking diet beer or jog- ging at six o'clock in the morning (Heaven forbid). But alas, the chickens have come home to roost. I'm paying the price for my indulgences and for avoiding the fitness revolution. There's no point of trying to dodge the issue anymore. I'm dragging around about 20 pounds of excess baggage. However, on the first day of summer, I found to my amazement that there are a lot of people in the same boat as me. In fact, there are quite a few with shapes that make me look like a race-horse. I thought I was the only guy in Canada who didn't belong to a health club. Not so. There are hundreds, thousands of people roaming the streets in shorts and t-shirts who look like a cross between Dick the Whale and Humpty-Dumpty. Suddenly, I didn't feel so badly about the way I look. I was wrong about the fitness revolution. There are a lot of people who didn't spend the winter pumping iron at Gold's Gym or grunting along with the 20 minute work-out. And does it ever show come summer time. However, just because there are others in worse shape that me doesn't obscure the fact that I do need to shed a few pounds. Most people make their resolutions on the first day of the New Year. I made one on the first day of sum- mer, and that is to give up those midnight ham and cheese sandwiches and try to develop a taste for diet beer. That's a start. As for jogging. Let me think about it. Same for ten- nis. Anyway, here's to summer. Like I said, it sure beats heck out of the Canadian winter. MUG SHOTS I don't know about you, but I resent the plan by the Conservative government of Ontario to force me to have my mug shot on my driver's licence. What's next, my fingerprints? Oh, sure, the government says that it is to make things easier for the police in nailing people who drive while under suspension. Fine, I'm all for that, nail them to the cross for that matter. But I don't like this creeping intrusion into my life by Big Brother down there at Queens Park. And besides, will putting photos on driver's licences get at the root of the problem? I doubt it, unless the Government really wants to take the bull by the horns and put some teeth in the drinking and driving laws. What do the courts do now if a person is caught driving while under suspension"? Another slap on the wrists which is hardly a deterrent. This Conservative government in Ontario is mov- ing more and more to slap controls on the individual, and I resent it. Next thing you know they'll be issuing identity cards. Big Brother is alive and well and work- ing quietly away at Queens Park, slowing turning us into a province of sheep. Welcome, Summer Now that the kids are out of school, is it safe to say that summer has officially arrived in Scugog Township? Of course it is. And you don't have to travel too far from home to find plenty of interesting and fun-filled things to do this summer right here in Scugog. In fact, this coming weekend, there are several events planned which are a great way to usher in the good old summertime. , If you get a kick out of local history, plan to visit the Scugog Shores Museum this weekend and get a taste of yesteryear with Pioneer Days. There will be exhibits and displays, and numerous events designed to show us what life was like for Scugog residents who lived before the turn of the century. Make it a point to pay a visit to the Scugog Shores Museum (located on Scugog Island) this weekend and see for yourself. With July 1 being Canada's national holiday, the Port Perry waterfront will again be the scene of a fireworks display, starting just after dusk this Sunday evening. We can't think of a better way for the whole family to kick off summer and wish Canada a Happy Bir- thdéay at the same time. And also this coming Saturday (June 30) is the Se- cond Annual Bass Derby for Lake Scugog with a top prize of $30,000 for one specially tagged bass. There are numerous other smaller cash prizes (from $25 to $200) for tagged largemouth bass. So why not get some friends together and try your luck in this Derby. Entry forms are $10 and will be available the day of the Derby at the Latcham Centre. Coming up in the middle of July, are the annual Western Days festivities with something of interest for just about everybody. There are all kinds of things going on right here in Scugog Township this summer. Make plans to take them in, and enjoy yourself, and have a happy and safe sum- mer, 1984. This Is Tennis? There are a lot of people who like to put the knock on the sport of hockey, saying it is nothing more than an excuse for organized mayhem and bloodshed. It is a physical game, played at break-neck speed and sometimes violence does occur at all levels, from the pros down through the minor ranks. But there is one thing that is not tolerated in organiz- ed hockey and that is abuse of officials and referees. Arguing with a referee can mean a penalty, a suspen- sion for one game or longer. Physical abuse of a referee will mean a year long suspension as Tom Lysiak of Chicago found out when he deliberately tripped a linesman with his hockey stick. The same is true for just about any other sport. If a player heaps verbal abuse on an official, the penalties are severe. But not so in tennis, it seems. And certainly not so when John McEnroe takes to the courts. At a recent match in England, he went on for several minutes berating an official with words like, 'I've got the choice of thousands of officials and | wind up with a moron like you.' Not satisfied to vent his anger against the game official, he carried on with insults towards the umpire in chief and tournament director. Of course this is nothing new for McEnroe, a player of undisputed skill and talent who unfortunately thinks he is bigger and better than the sport itself. When asked about his behaviour after the match, he said simply that in ten years people will be thanking him for berating the officials, which by his twisted logic will result in better officiating. Can anyone imagine what would happen if Wayne Gretzky called an NHL referee a moron? He most cer- tainly would face a suspension and heavy fine and it wouldn't matter if it came right in the middle of a heated playoff series. Why is it that the people who run major tennis tour- naments allow McEnroe to get away with such behaviour? Are they afraid to suspend him for six months or a year? Would tennis fans really stay away from tour- naments if McEnroe was on the sidelines? Are the of- ficials of this sport being thrown to the wolves for the sake, of a so-called "big name drawing card?" The real danger in McEnroe's antics and abuse is the affect this may have on impressionable young ten nis players. What are they to think when they see the (Turn to page 8) EE "