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« xf Ld JOHN LOOKS INWARD AFTER NEW YEAR 'T'was with some trepidation that I awoke on New Year's Day. The night before had been Hogmanay, the biggest night of the year for any Scotsman and there have been some New Year's Days I haven't awakened at all and quite a few I remember with no great affection. This morning I could hear the faint sounds of what seemed to be a full scale party. It seemed unlikely that any of my neighbours, conservative stodgies that they are, would still be celebrating so I listened more closely. Ths noises were coming from my stomach. "Aha!" I'thought, "my friends, the Digestives must be celebrating the New Year." Fully awake, I looked around at the Hot Water bottle. She was sleeping soundly so I prepared to go down and visit the fellows. Clutching my epiglottis, I dropped the last few feet and joined the party. Enos was singing at the pitch of his tiny voice, Bromos was beating time with a pretzel on a large square of shortbread while Fahrenheit was attempting to stuff a boiled egg up his. nose. by Mrs. Ruby Fielding Church Sunday, Jan. 9 at 11:15 a.m. Rev. C. Clarke in charge. The Manchester U.C.W. will meet at the church on Thurs. January 6 at 2 p.m. Guests with Mr. and Mrs. Frank Johnson and Wesley over the holidays were Mr. and Mrs. Jim Torrens and family of Montreal, Mr. and Mrs. Harley Johnson and family of Fenwick. Miss Doris Chamberlain of Halifax visited with Mr. and Mrs. John Kingstone for a week, Miss Janet Davies also visited them on the holidays. Guests with Mr. and Mrs. L.B. Roberts were Mrs. E. M. Latimer, Mrs. Marjory Walsh, Mrs. Francis Hutch- inson and Mr. Jack McKee of Toronto and Mrs. Gordon King and boys of Rexdale over the holidays. Mr. and Mrs. Roy Dobson visiting Mr. and Mrs. Ken Proctor at Oshawa on Sun-, ili : Ch | [) THE UNITED CHURCH OF CANADA PORT PERRY CHARGE Rev. R. Brawn, Minister SUNDAY, JANUARY 9 10 a.m. The Lord's Supper Sunday School Prince Albert 11:30 The Lord's Supper Sunday School SCUGOG PASTORAL CHARGE Rev. C. E. Clarke SUNDAY, JANUARY 9 9:45 a.m. Scugog 11:15 a.m. Manchester . PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH IN CANADA SUNDAY, JANUARY 9 St. John's Port Perry 9:55 a.m. Divine Worship Burn's Church, Ashburn 10:00 Sunday School 11:15 Divine Worship Listen to Amazing Grace Sunday Morning at9:15a.m. CKLB OSHAWA - DIAL 1350 Minister: The Rev. Stuart McEntyre Manse: 985-3409 Study: 985-3881 PENTECOSTAL CHURCH Rev. R. Batten Rev. 1. MacLean 10 a.m. Family Bible Hour 11a.m. Praise and Worship 7p.m. Evang, Service 'Manchester News day. Miss Arlett Dick of Cinn- cinatta week-end guest with the L. Best family. Holiday guests with Mr. and Mrs. W.J. Mitchel were Mr. and Mrs. B.D. Hitchens Oshawa, Mr. and Mrs. Norris Hitchens, Jody, James and Shelly of Bow- manville, Mr. and Mrs. Doug Gillard and Christine of Toronto and Mr. and Mrs. W.J. Tapscott also Mr. - Jason Pearce of Toronto who is the new owner of the Howsam estate and they hope to be living in their new remodelled home soon. New Years visitors with Art Fieldings were Mr. and Mrs. Art Anness and family, Mrs. R. Jewell, Miss R. Thomas, Mrs. Helen Jewell and Mrs. Fern Fielding. Belated wedding anniver- sary greetings to Mr. and Mrs. W.J. Mitchel who were married 58 years last week. Services PORT PERRY BAPTIST CHURCH Rev. D. C. Payne, Pastor 9:45 a.m. Bible School 11 a.m. Morning Worship 7 p.m. Evening Hour of Praise Tues. 10 a.m. Coffee Hour Wed. 7:30 p.m. Prayer Mtg All Welcome CHURCH OF ASCENSION ANGLICAN Rev. R.C. Rose, Minister Hon. Asst. Rev. A. Woolcock THURSDAY, JANUARY 6 Epiphany 11 a.m. Holy Communion SUNDAY, JANUARY 9 Epiphany 1 11:15 a.m. Morning Prayer and Church School ST. JOHNS, BLACKSTOCK SUNDAY, JANUARY 9 Epiphany 1 9:30 a.m. Morning Prayer and Church School by john mack I spoke to Seltzius, who seemed the only sane one in the crowd. "What's going on here?" "They're all drunk." At the sound of my voice they all turned to look at me except for Fahrenheit who was now trying to dislodge the boiled egg by standing on his head. "How come you're not drunk?" I asked Seltzius. "I never touch the stuff. Besides, one of us has to stay sober in case we get stopped by the Digestive Police." . "Do you mrean Fahrenheit is drunk?" "Drunk as a skunk. They were all right until you had those last three for the road and that just knocked them over." ' But that was hours ago." "It takes time to reach us down here. I'll warn you though. If you don't get those three sobered up just you wait until the hangover starts. You've never had a hangover like this one will be." Just then Fahrenheit burst into song. Enos joined in and Bromo went back to beating time with the pretzel. I shouted, "Shut up!" at the pitch of my voice. There was a sudden silence and then two other little fellows popped into view from one of the passages. They were in uniform and looked some- what officious. "Here! Here! What's all the noise about?" "The Digestive Police," whispered Seltzius. "Keep quiet and I'll get rid of them." "Just a little party, officer. Just celebrating New Year. We're all Scotsmen here and this is our big party of the year." "Well, keep it down or I'll have to run the lot of you in," With this they ducked back into the passage. rR IN NER OR EN NTS FA A000 NS AY RAST SO RA IIS AN CON 5S Seta 57 5 . H 3 FOE OOLLA TE VI Se Th, JAE SL V2 ity AT CA SRN NA SR A HV Sa A PORT PERRY STAR -- Wednesday, Jan. 5, 1977 -- 19 '"That was a near thing," said Seltzius. "Would they really have run you in?" "Remember the time you went to the wedding? The one where you sang all night and the Hot Water Bottle couldn't get you to shut up?" '"That's because you had no Digestives. We were all in jail. 'Drunk and Disorderly! Seven days in the pokey! the man said." "What am I going to do? Fahrenheit is getting worse. He's laughing and giggling away to himself and look at that silly party hat he's wearing. Where did he get that?" "Remember last night betting that fellow you could eat your paper hat? Well, you won." Just then there was a lot of giggling and scuffling from one of the passages and in popped four more Digestives. 'Oh dear," said Seltzius, "here come the girls." "The girls?" "Yes, these are the girls visiting from your Hot Water Bottle." "You mean these are the Hot Water Bottle's Digestives?" "Yes, and one of them is already snuggling up with Fahrenheit." Just than I heard a loud hail from above. 'Hey, Mac! Are you down there?" "Yes," I shouted. "I'm just visiting the fellows." "You'd better get up here. I feel terrible. There is something wrong with my stomach." "I know what's wrong with your stomach. Your Digestives are down here." "Tell them to get back here right away." "They're all dancing and carrying on. break up the party." "Without my Digestives I'm certainly not getting out of this bed today. I'll just sleep in. If you want any breakfast you'd better break up that party." "You're sure you don't want to come down and join us?" "Not a chance. I had enough partying last night. I just want to sleep." 'Sleep well dear. Would one of you guys pass me a pretzel?" I can't Free Silver Dollar with Every Sq. Yard of carpet purchased! During our JANUARY CARPET SALE SHAGS | $4 29 Plus 1 Free Silver Dollar per sq. yd. on all Red Tagged rolls! HARD- TWISTS 6°? Plus 1 Free Silver Dollar sq. yd. LEVEL LOOPS SAM99 Plus 4 1 Free Silver Dollar per sq. yd. DURHAM CARPET CLEANING - SALES & SERVICE HOURS Mon. to Fri. 10 AM. - 8 P.M. Saturday 9 ALM. to 5 P.M. nd Accepted 60 WATER STREET - PORT PERRY - 985-3773 DAL ae) BAR SR I EE Ea a vg oe -l FORE gap TE oy A tp TIT ripple AE, Cy Re re ~ a tl WS VES