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Editorial Comments Olympic spirit Congratulations to Scugog Township Council for the commitment to take on the task of providing accomodation for the 300 cyclists who will pass this way, August 31 this year, in preparation for a 1976 cross-country bicycle tour that will help open the Olympics. With a $750,000 arena project underway in this community, it seems almost imparative that Scugog jump at the chance to do something to help out the national effort. The eventual pre-Olympics cross-country effort will be a first of its kind in Canada, providing an original opportunity for this community to get in on all the excitement. All that, without the labour problems. Taxes can bear it While council is feeling big-hearted, might we suggest that they collectively put a little doughon the line to help send their two representatives dol the Nonquon in the annual Canoe the Nonquon race, June 7th. = As far as we know, Coun. Bob Brinkman and Jerry Taylor haven't been able to squeeze a dime out of that budget-whittling group. If there are going to be two councillors thrashing their way down the Nonquon this year, they might as well go big. We suggest a couple of dollars a mile as the official council pledge, which wouldn"t excuse the rest of council from putting a few bucks on the line, individually. Aroseis arose The Region of Durham will be able to keep its name, despite the objections of the Town of Durham, the Supreme Court of Canada ruled last week, ending a two and a half year legal battle that started when the town initiated court proceedings against the region, argueing it had some proprietary right to its name, . destiny and preservation of its heritage. Now that we can keep the name, we'll have to come to grips with the next problem. How to make it work. LONE T OFFICE | Remember When..? 50 YEARS AGO Thursday, May 28, 1925 The fourth annual Ontario Livestock Judging competit- ion was held at Brooklin and Columbus with one hundred and fifteen contestants taking part. This was the largest county affair of this kind ever held in the Pro- vince. Some of the prize win- ners listed that day which may be interesting were - Frank Lee, John Dobson, Will Heron, Eugene Dear- born, Merlin Gilroy, Stanley Spencer, Norman Munro, Harold Honey, and Orval Chambers. After three years absence of baseball in Port Perry, this year was different, and Port Perry became a member of the Big Four League, Lind- say, Oakwood, Sunderland and Port Perry. The season opened with a double-header. Lindsay won from Port Perry 19-7, while Sunderland took Oakwood 18-5. Baldy Doubt was on the mound for Port Perry, Ted Jackson and Charlie Turner, although each had an error or two to their credit, turned in good games in the field. Mr. Roy Thompson of Pros- pect has bought a building lot across from Mr. W. Grahams from Mr. Arthur Savage and will erect a residence. } 25 YEARS AGO Thursday, May 25, 1950 Empire Day was cele- brated at the Port Perry Public School with an impressive ceremony held on the lawn. Girl Guides, C.G.L.T., Boy Scouts, Ex- plorers and Cubs all in dress uniforms help in the Patriotic demonstrations. Rev. J. T. Coneybeare was the speaker for the afternoon sessions. A bus load of Girl Guides, their mothers and leaders at- tended the Guide Rally at Maple Leaf Gardens to com- memorate the fortieth year of Guiding. Did you know that when Cartwright was surveyed- and the school section laid out, a school building for S.S. No. 4 was planned and built on the farm of Mr. Spinks, locally known as King Spinks. It was located on the third concession, on a corner near the Quarter Line Road, south of the saw mill. It was a warm log structure of ample size. } The Port Perry Rod and Gun Club are again this year sponsoring a Carp Derby. 15 YEARS AGO Thursday, May 26, 1960 Mr. Gary Boyd, son of Mr. and Mrs. M. M. Bovd of (continued on page 5) 4 Bill Smiley The Ides are upon us » THE IDES ARE UPON US This is the time of year that everybody wishes somebody would do something about, but nobody does. The Ides of March. Some people think the Ides are little creatures like leprechauns who bore holes in your rubbers and whisper into tots' ears that that 18-inch puddle won't go over the tops of their six-inch rubber boots. Others, like my wife, think they are malevolent beings who enjoy scaring the liver out of you. The other night, there was greatrumble, a crash, and all the lights wen out. I thought it was maybe the second coming. She leaped a foot. *"It's the Ides of March," she screamed. As a matter of fact, it was the ice off the roof, which tore away the main cable into the house. But it could just as well have been the Ides. Around the first of March, we decided we'd start cross-country skiing. Bought two sets of skis, boots, the works. It rained for the . next week. That was the Ides. It's been going on for at least 2,000 years. It's first victim of any import was Julius Caesar. Now, »Big Julie was no slouch as an emperor. He had, in his day, a bigger empire than Queen Victoria had, although he wasn't as fat. . . He had a penchant for over-running and over-hearing. He over-ran the Spaniards, the French, the Germans, the British and the Belgians, not to mention the Slobs, in the east. And he over-heard. It was his custom to prowl-among the campfires at night, and SPT [43 $ord i % Sr listen to his disgruntled veterans. He didn't bother much with the gruntled veterans. He did it, of course, incognito. He wore a kilt, extra-long, to cover his pot and his knees. On his head, to mask his baldness, he wore a German helmet, captured in the epic battle of Scheissinkellar. His chest was disguised by a chest-disguiser, captured from an Amazon cheiftainess who had joined Women's Lib and decided to go braless. (It is tempting for the dedicated historian to digress here, but I will make only two concise points. One, the kilt was stripped from a Scot who had strayed south to found the Bank of England, had been conscripted into the army of the Ancient Britons and had died gallantly, shouting '"Usquebaugh and Andrew Carnegie!" The helmet had been torn from a dead squarehead and was rather uncomfortable until Julius discovered that the cow's horn on the front unscrewed, was . hollow, and contained 13 ounces of schnapps. From that time on, he found it comfortable. On the Amazon breastworks, I will say nothing. There's enough sex and violence in history, without dwelling on it. Besides it is, or was, pointless.) At any rate, strolling anonymously (""Oh! Oh!, here comes Himself!""') he over-heard the rumblings of discontent among his troops. It was rather difficult to distinguish them from the other rumblings associated with the rude and licentious soldiery, but he had a Trained Ear as well as a Roman Nose. He and his legions had just put down the seventh uprising by some Belgian tribe. One grizzled veteran was heard to say: "Belgians, Belgians! I'm sick of looting Belgian towns. All they got is gloves and tapestries. My old Trouble 'n Strife back 'ome 'as 32 pairs of kid gloves an' enough tapestries to make a shawl for the Sphinx." Another veteran, equally grizzled, agreed. "Me too. And them Belgian broads; I swear they got fetlocks. In another 1,500 years, they'll be callin' em Percherons." A third veteran legionary, even more grizzled than the other two, concurred. "Right. And howbout that there Belgian beer. So watery ya gotta drink it in the latrine or yer caught short. I'd give my eye tooth to get a whack at some Limeys or Frogs or Krauts fer a change. Wooden even mine goin' backta Iddaly and wiping' up somma them Wops we're workin' for." (It might be noted, in the interests of historical accuracy, that the third legion- naire, like so many of them, was not an ancient Roman. He was an Old Pole, who had been conscripted after he had been shot out from under his horse during an attach on Wvabldnschvtz.) Anyway, overhearing his grizzled, grizz- ling veterans, Caesar decided to act. He made a speech to his legions that had them in tears. This was after a double rum ration. Then he put down the Belgians for the eighth time, and to make his intentions clear, cut off the right hand of each male Belgian. This was the origin of the phrase "putting me down' and also the reason you see so many left-handed Belgians. Perhaps we've strayed a bit. Very well, back to the Idés of March. One day, early in March, back in 16 (or was it '17?) B.C., Julius was on his way to the Colosseum to make sure everything was in order for the Games. He had already checked with Zeus and Mayor Drapeau, but you never know, do you? . He 'was in his chariot, with his wife, California. She was attended by her maid, Florida, and on the runningboard were three old fiends of Caesar: Cassius, Nausious and Brutus. Suddenly, a stentorian voice rang out, as stentorian voices do. Some ring out like a great, bronze bell. Others just ring out a sort of ding-a-ling. This was a bearded, ding-a-ling type stentor. "'Beward the Ides of March!" he trilled. Unfortunately, Caesar was deaf in one ear. He thought the sooth-sayer (that's what they call the ding-a-ling in those days), was a soap salesman with a new jingle, something about washing with Tide and starch. Naturally, he waved him away, muttering something about California using nothing but arctic power.' . ' Some days later, right to the day, the Ides of March arrived. Well, you know the rest. Big Julie was assassinated. His friend Cassius crowned him with a cassock, his pal Nausious breathed garlic in his face, and his beloved Brutus stabbed him Lo in the rotunda. Youmightsay that Caesar came out of that one a heavy loser. He went in at 154 pounds and came out with 16 daggers in him. So all I can suggest is that you keep an eye out for those Ides. The Argyle Syndicate Ltd. K