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be Iti {ds i * awit Y NEWSPAPER, = grammes, Bill Heads, Blank Forms, Receipt ~ JONES, M. D,, INE! A. * County biodive y % | i | mi a 2054 1 i all arrears R. bila Coronor for the County of Donnie Lysielun, Surgeon and Ac- ' aoucheur, . Senn. AGRICULTURAL, AND, 18 PUBLISHED AT PORT PERRY, THURSDAY MORNING, BAIRD & "pARSONS. TERMS --$1 or annum, | if paid in ads ; if not $1.50 will be charged. No nd hans six oni; RATES OF ADVERTISING. 1 first insertion ........$0 08 gouh ine, Sst fnsetion.. " . 002 under 6 lines, per annum ..... 5 00 $8 Letters containing money, yhen ad- |, dressed to this Office, pre-paid and WHOLE NO. 844 1 afl ure. | Wrotessional '@arus. | H. L. HARNDEN, L.D.S., Surgical and Mechanical Dentist, Of Twelve Years Experience, he over Mr. Gordon's Store, PORT PERRY, CHAS. THORN, VS. EMBER of the Veterinary Institute, Chicago, Ill. Gold Medalist for the best examina on Horse Practice. Author of a First Prize Essay on S8hoeing, Gradu- afed Sept, 16, 1867. Dr. Thorn begs to annoynce that he has taken up his residence at Port Perry, and is ROW Pi to treat all cases entrusted to his cave in the most skillful and scientific manner, All orders left at the Medical Hal) of Mr Allison, will receive prompt attention, B@™ The Veterinary Stables may be found on Lilly street, opposite Cossitt's Factory. Port Perry, Oct. 28, 1873. Now FoR FIRST CLASS z= LIVERY RIGS. -- W. H. PARK, Jr, AS fitted np a Livery Stable opposite the Post Office, Port Perry, where first class Livery Rigs 'can always be had on moderate terms. W. H. PARK, Jr, Pp Port Perry, Jan. 22, 1874, MONEY TO LOAN MORTCACES WANTED. -- HE Subscribers have lai roved Farms, Village othor » Bocuritics in this and ad} As we have funds on hand at al ?' times TTOWers sums of mon- investment on Properties, and otbing QGounties od, will be at our risk. and charged according to the space they ac- cupy. " Ad: for ame instructons, willbe inserted | entil fordid apd charged aiccodingly. No | advertisment will be taken out until paid for A liberal di aud others who advertise by the year or half-year, LA terms will jp a]l cases be ctly adhered to. Job Department. * Phamplets, Hand Bilis, Posters, Pro- 11 + Merch Books, Checks, Books, Circulars, Business Oards, Ball Cards, &c., of every style and talor, executed promptly and at lower rates than | any other establishment in the County. §EF™ Parties from a distance getting hand bills, &c. printed can have them done to take wome with them. J. BAIRD: H. PARSONS. Professional Cars. "&« MALT.ORY, Physicians, )s and Accoucheurs, Port Perry. (OMoe, over Allison's Drug Store, Queen-st. E. MALLORY, M.D.,C, De BRATHW AlTE, t Perry. HENRY GRIST, PATENT SOLICITOR AND DRAGGRIGMLN, OTTAWA, CANADA, TPransacts business with the Patent Office and other di of the Gov t noon | til their money with the east ossibio qolay: id WANTED TO PURCHASE, Any number of Mortgages for which the high- est id will be allowed. ' Wearealso appraisers for the Canada Fer anen, Buialng Socletv, the Sho eu uid a. Paid Copyrights and the Registration of Trade Marks and Designs | Lseared Drawings, iff , and other 1 neces. sary to secure Patents of Invention, prepared on iin of the mode} of the Invention. est n C iar > Capital $1, So oy ir AR To Payable in from 2 to 20 y Lands Bought and Sola. Several good farms for sale. JE Agents for several first class Fire In- - Suctioneers. W. M. WILLCO LICENSED AUCTIONEER. FOR THE COUNTY OF ONTARIO, , surance Companies Collections made and a general agency busi- ness transacted. 7% DEBENTURES BOUGHT."GR JOHN & DAVID J. ADAMS, General Agents, Office in Mr, Ross' Ontario Buildings, Port Perry. Pert Perry, Oct. 11, 1872, MONE 70 LEND! AND TOWNSHIPS OF MARJPOSA & CARTWRIGHT, EGS to thank his many friends and the public generally, for the liberal patron- age bestowed upon him for the past five years. Having now given up the business of Bailiff, I intend, in future, to devote my , whole time to the business' of Auctioneer, Collecting, &c. It will be my STAY) by prompt and careful , to give full Prinee Albert. PHILP, M. D., late or Newburg, ots - Hh Port Sita 258 Office Over Mr. Currie's Store, "SR Residence at the house of the Rev. S. Philp, $Ben., Routh of the School House, Prince Albert. Dr MARTIN & DrGRASSI, t Lingua, RH, MCGILL & RAJ, Physclans, Snrgeons, D &e., &c, Office and Residences, King st, oshawn, WM. GILL, MLM. FRANCIS RAE, M.D. 'M. F. MCBRIEN, M.D, M. R. (.. 8, Guy's Hospital, London, England. The Sil 0, H. L., !E. FAREWELL, LL. B., County Crown J Attorney for Uiniario, Barrister, Sljosney 3 , Bolieivor, and Ofc Tato oc: eupled ar 8 H. rion Ble Esq,, Brock, Sor : Whitby. Oshawa, YMAN L. Chancery, Attorney, Conveyancer, &c. Oshawa. Omice~Simcae street, opposite the Post Office. YOUNG SMITH, Ll. B, Bacgrister, At- torney-at-Law, lieltor in 'Chueery, and Insolvency, Notary Public, &c. Office--McMiilan's Block, Brock street, Whighy. AMERON & a L, d Attorneys at Law, Solicitors County Coun), [IE OfMees : Court House, 'Whitby. H. J. MAGDONNELL. Barristers M. C, CAMERON, A. AURD, Attorney ENGLISH LL. B, Solicitor in Fy satisfaction to all ety may favor me with their Sales or Collecting. Bi'ls draughted and Blank Notes furnished free of charge. Also Bill Stamps always on hand. Arrangements can be made for sales &e., at the Onsenver Office, and at the Stundurd Office, Port Perry. W. M. WILLCOX, Prince Albert, Oct. 23, 1873 CROTHERS & WILSON Licensed Auctioneers for the County of Ontario, RE prepared to conduct Sales anywhere LX in the County. may rely on the utmost attention being given to their interests. G. Crothers is also Agent for all kinds of Agricultural Implements. All orders addressed to G. Crothers, Epsom , P. 0., will receive prompt attention. Wm. Gordon, d Aueti , Wi , &e. YOR the Township of Brock, Uxbridge, Scott, Thorah, Rama, Mara, Mariposa and Eldon, BES Parties entrusting their Sales to me may rely on the utmost attention being given #0 theirinterests. WM. GORDON, Sunderland, Brock. THOS. H. WALSHE. JCENSED Anctioneer for the Township of Brock, Thorah, Mara & Rama in North Ontario ; Mariposa, etc., in the County Parties placing their Sales in our hands | The undersigned has any amount of Money | t#leud upon Farm and Town Property, at Unusually Low Rates of Interest! | Loans can be repaid in any manner to suit the horrower, | Also several Improved Farms, and Wild Lands for sale, cheup. Investments made in Municipal Deben- tures, Bank and othr marketable Stocks. Apply to Laid down in Port Perry. April, Port Perry, Feb. 21, 1874. STOVES Is drawing to a close and the subscriber has on hand a W. T. PARRISH. N. B Coal Oil by ihe barrel or car-load very cheap as 1 have several car-loads on hand yet which must be djsposed of. Dealers will do we]l to call before purchasiing elsewhere. WwW. T. Very Large Stock of all kinds he will sell the BALANCE AT COST ! All parties in want of a stove can be snited both as regirds variety, quality and cheapness. have alsn on hand a full Stock of all kinds of HARDW ARE, PAINTS, OILS, &c., which will be sold Cheap to make room for my large Spring Stock which will arrive about the 1st of ! 1 P. PIRT PERRY LIVERY STABLES, C. M°' KENZIE, PROPRIETOR HE Subscriber having now fully equipped S > and extensive Livery Stables with a supply of superior Horses and Carriages, 1s prepared to furnish Arst cluss JAMES HOLDEN, Official Assignee, Broker, &c. | Oprice--Over the Dominion Bank, McMil- | Ian's Block, Brock st., Whitby. Whitby, April 10, 1873. MONEY! MONEY! ! MORE The Subscriber would intorm all in want of Moucy that he is prepared to negotiate Loans with the Tist and Loan Society of | Toronto, for any amount of money from $400 AND UPWARDS, On Mortgage S-curity on Town or Farm Property. The iuterest is only 8 per cent. | No Commission charged, and Loans pro- cured without delay. JOHN TAYLOR. Manchester, Nov. 12, 1873. Mutual Insurance Company. This C y is now fully ed and is prepared to accept rishs on Faun Buildings | and their contents, country School Houses and Churches, Those wishing to insure and thereby support a 'Home Insurance Company have now an opportunity of doing so, cither | 'by applying to the Head Office, or to any of | | the local Agents of the Company. Our rates will be found as low as those of any respon- | sible Mutual Insurance Company in Canada. | Head Office--Opposite the Royal Hotel, A RR ty prey gtLaw, and Solicitor of Victoria. Residence--Cannington, Brock.' Brock §t,, Whitby. Orders left at this office, or at his residence L. FAIRBANKS, Jn & Port Perry, will be punctually attended to. Debts col L. FA Ry on x. AMES LAMON, A Attorney at Law, Solicitor fdeoted in Cannington, or otherwise, and Becretary. FLY 5) . Office in' Bartana fi Riook, HR the Notth Ontario Auction. " 8, &o., Uxbridge. y 0 on- in Sure, oer. ' WESTERN ASSURANCE COMP'Y Uxbridge. Jam, Salieri ouneory ota Bob TORONTO. ' veyanoer, &0, fiapstrs, Sota Fort Ferry. dnsorporated......- +. 1831. OC. N. VARS, L. D. 8, BEECH inserted on atl the latest princi- T las jRcie art, dnd as cheap as the cheap- and as good as the best. Teeth filled 'with: Gold and Silver. Toth axirmoa) b, ucing' local anmsth- re jain by Deodusing Cowan's new "block, over Atkinson's Drug Store, King , Btreet, Oshawa.. * ©.D. WAID, Connon DENTIST, Usbridge Village. All Dental 'operations purkormied vis I AST OF DIVISION COURTS 4 FOR THE County of Ontario, FOR THE YEAR 1874. 8400, 000. an John-MeMurrich. Capital - "MONEY! LIVERY RIGS On Moderate Terms. C. MCKENZIE, Port Perry, Aug. 6, 187: 3 JOHN 8. M. WILLOOX, F the 'Fown of Whitby, has been ap- | pointed OFFICIAL ASSIGNEE for the county of Ontario. Any business entrusted to his charge will be carefully at- tended to, JEWELRY, BOOK, STATIONERY | AND FANCY GOODS EMPORIUM, (HE Subscriber in tendering his hearty | thanks to his numerous customers for their liberal patronage, would inform them and the public generally, that his stock has ! just been replenished with a choice sclee- {tion of Goods of the latest styles, newest | patterns and best quality which he offers at the lv west possible figures at which such goods can be sold. In FINE GOLD JEWELRY; Chains, Ear-Rings, Finger-Rings, Brooches, &c., | Goldipe and Fancy Jewelry in great variety | IN BOOKS: | Large Family Bibles and every variety of | Beautiful Bibles, Prayer Books, Hymn Books, &c., &c. All the best authors in Poetry, History, Biography, &c. A large and complete ass: tment of SCHOOL BOOKS. An excellent variety of Albums. Ip, Stationery :--Ledgers, Journals, Day Books, &e., &c. A large assortment of Legal | Forms such as Blank Deeds, Mortgages, Leases, &c., &c. inks of the. best quality. Fancy Goods in great variety. Berlin and other fine Wools. Everything on stock ! will be sold at the lowest possible figures. ly 'The best Sc wing Machiwes in the Domin- ion furnished at prices which defy competi- | tion. Ladies' Work Boxes. 1am Agent for thy famous Instruments | manufactured by R.& Wilson of Toronto -- Pianos, Organs apd Mel folins, Writing- Books, Paper and | vi _ + Fhotels HENRY FOY, convenience of the pu Bar, Ostlers, of public patronage, I OYAL CANADIAN HOTEL. PORT PERRY. = PROPRIETOR, The Subscriber having leased the above Hotel has fitted it up in a style in keeping with the rapidly increasing business and prosperity of the Village and neighborhood, and with direct reference to the comfort and Strict attention paid to the Table and the Comfortable Stables snd attentive Neither labor nor expense will be spared Lin making the Royal Canadian HS3el worthy Port Perry, June 16, 1869. i | Rosi PERRY HOUSE, JAS. V. THOMPSON, ably furnish the Home § country, PORT PERRY. PROPRIETOR. The above House is now most comfort- ed, and Guests are cared for in 1 Good Liquors and Cigars, also, first class Stabling and good Ostlers.-- Additions have been made which maker this the largest and best House in this section of Tare $1.00 per Day. ==: HOTEL, PORT PER Port Perry, 11, 1873. ted RY. JAMES DEWART, - PROPRIETOR. The Subscriber having leased this excel- lent Hotel and fitted it up with a view to the comfort of guests and the accommoda- tion of the general public, will Ye glad to welcome old friends and pew to take part in the hospitality of the Queen's. The Table carefully supplied, Choice Liquors and Cigars in the Bar, the Yard and Stables punctually attended . The Queen's is conveniently situated few rods west of the Post Office, JAMES DEWART. A Soro-aERIc AN HOTEL, PRINCE ALBERT, ONT. WM. BADGEROW, PROPRIETOR. The ahove commodious hotel has been to. newly rep an point for tentive ostlers. and hag apple ii for the re- ception of guests. It supplies a most con- Sglent Commercigl travelers. Comfortable and roomy stabling and at- 3 (Cprann HOTEL, Concertinas, &., ofthe best description. Remember the pace--Allen's Emporium, opposite the Ontario Bank, Port Perry. (Gro. H. DartyeLt, Junior Judge, Whithy, Jan. 1, 1874. no dar, andat pices» hich or. Joyd 3 Brome, Wid os. Gould, Esq. TR REMOVAL. ber wonld.. ia ke this oppor- Buperots oe THR toned, NE yao on Port Perry Depart » TI lk cl: and wos John McDonald, hen ier do oem ho pablo Port. Parry, over air.| MCARBLE DEALER ! |Wmitto 8 ! Bk He he apps to NEWCASTLE, ONT. Wit" ony do Yio lay require pr JFONUMENTS, TombTables, Head- Hon--Asti¥ "anton sll 3 * Platform Stations--Trainslop on Signal ital of of the | AY. LVL Stones of great variety, with every de- 'connections, | Sort Pony, October 15, 1873. A Rd Marriage Licenses 5 in all Kips of Jowet, Faacy w= Ee | Greggs, Port Slope; 3 MONEY (Private Funds] terest, LYMAN ENGLISH, 4 Barrister, &c., November, 21; 1866. | \ + sion Port Perry. Office hours from 10a. m. to 8.p. m. To.Lpan on good Farms, at 8 per cent in- wa, 14 W. BURNHAM, Olork of tho Third Divi- Court. = Uffice in Bigelow's Block, # t 3 'Aberdeén ofa Leot10 dn the 1st ining of Brock. y per Ey afieftion id to Partios will find it to their advan. Through ckets tage to witbhold thelr orders unl caled on | rom Posh Perry to Tord, oan, be pe MONEY | MONEY i | Beerd Gutter i tb od b, d oy i our Agen s -- ied J. C: WILLIAMSON, Oror'a ont Grab id Fran at throne H Jore CHRISTIE, aly at Shank. Ji NEY Y 10 LOAN 8 po cout neat # FOWNSHEP CLIR, Satisfaction guaranteed, an work war 3 ssuer of Marriage Licenses--Conveyancer. ranted. ) A. HURD. Commissioner, &c. > January 10, 1872: ar} (Bprt Perry, March 12, 1874. « 121 Office--Manchester. ¢ i il " mt EE ------ Sa ; scription of Marble Work, suitable for .Cem- dA f Alsop. 3 only. son ? East and West, by {caving | ¥ PORT and SHERRY WINE. - JAMES PRINGLE, leneral T' Marn--daily and weekly H He glzizls i Coneral Agent. | the Toro Groms--daily and weekly 2121213 18(3 " for Sale. S5AR= 31 9 THOMAS ALLEN. ) 3 : 1 1 3 3 OF 2 Travelers Guide. Port Perry, September 24, 1873. 620 41 9 9123 | == - 7.21 6810 10'18 fimo {1 LT a. |2NYINI eR KAS IMPORTED! HENRY CHARLES H* Received a further supply of ' TENNANT'S XXX PORTER 00 And ALE in Stone Jars. HENNESSY'S JULE ROBIN & Co, and OTARD'S BRANDY. KENTE'S HOLLAND and OLD TOM. " ALSO ALD. WELLS' TORONTO ALE. WALKERS Extra MALT and RYE. 01: 20 4 general assortment of Teas, Sugars Coafish, Oan'd Fruits, Fish, Sede) Port Perry, Sept. 8, 18783. te of +i and traveling public. the tabla and the bar, and an attentive ostler. I JArE "HOUSE, UTICA, Good dai GREENBAN R. McRAE, PROPRIETOR. The abave hotel has undergone a thorough i has:L itted up with a view to the comfort and convenience of the Strict attention paid to Comfortable stables Greenbank, March 25, 1894, J. DAFOE, PROPRIETOR. Good stabling. Careful to the requirements of travelers and guests. bis oki supplied with the best wines, ligumis cif a HOTEL, SAINTFIELD, J. JENNINGS, = PROPRIETOR. AE HOTEL, public. | Every! 'Whitby, June 20, 1870. CWHRITHY., A. MASON, - PROPRIETOR. This Hotel bas undergone a thorough re- novation and been fitted up with a view to the comfort and convenience of the travel'ng ttention paid table and bar, while obliging and attentive Ostlers will have charge of the stables. - to the REVERE HOUSE, MANCHESTER, os EE nie above need Ha ob MATOH MAKING. re BY Lorry BROWN. (Concluded. y n answer to the hearty peal which sounded through the hall, a servant thrust out a gloomy, forbid- ding face. ¢ Is Mr, or Mrs Forsythe at hom,' cried Mr Forsythe, ¢ Yes sir, but--' ' Well 2 \ ¢ If you please, madam is ill.' + Take up our names. Here is a card. Tell them that business of importance, which demands imme: diate attention, has brought us from Boston to them.' The girl took the card and vanish- gd. After aimoment she reappeared with dire melancholy stamped upon her Celtic countenance. ' You'll please come this way, and the folks will be down there in a minute.' This way' led throngh the dimly lighted hall into a library at the back of the house, where for ten miserable minutes Mr. Forsythe held his wife's cut- glass viniagrette to her pose and fanned her w ith his hat. At the end of that time Mr Eng lish opened the dour and entered, supporting his wife who hang limp, feeble and dejected on hisarm. Be- hind her with-smelling salts and fan walked a maid. At the first sight of the visitors, Mrs. Inglish made a movement as if to throw herself at them, but failing in this, fell back, crying : 'Qb! oh! oh! oh! and the frightened husband shook her up like a feather bolster, and the maid administered salts and tan. Mrs, Forsythe rallied and pered : ¢ She has heard all as true as you live, and now we shall have a time of it. whis- and Dwight shook hands with his| father-in-law and kissed his mother- in law. Ten minutes after the house was illuminated, and they all went out to supper. 'Ideclare, it was the greatest alarm I ever had,' said Mrs English; ' but it ends beautifully.' ' Yes, charmingly, but take my advice and bury the past. Don't let them know how anxious we were to have them marry ; if you do they'll be divorced before the year ends, said Mrs Forsythe. So the matter ended ; but Mrs Forsythe quietly says that if she had a dozen boys, she would let them make their own matches. After spending ten years in plotting and planning and buying up silver and to have the affair so abruptly taken out of her hands. The ten years' work is thrown away, and no matter how happy they may be, she will never get any credit for it. er e------ A certain man has a watch which he says months. wife in. her husband's beard no one blame her for being down upon him. can well, Judge Jeffreys, pointing with his cane at a prisoner before him observed, ¢ There is a The great rogue at the end of this stick.' man repliul, ¢ At which end, my®lord ?' could not spell words more ways than one.' and displaying his ponderous fists, Here Mrs English groaned : ¢ Oh my unfortunate daughter! ¢ We sincerely regret--' began Mrs Forsythe. «Oh of couse you do. But must not blame us.' Getting sarcastic," thought Nirs Tr. ¢ She will Te herein a few minutes She and the--the--the viper!" cried poor Mrs Euglish. Don't distress yourself, my love!" surgrested Mr English, * Who is the viper Mis asked Forsythe. ud + Oh, you know as much about 1t Itis all a mystery, a a dreadful, dreadful, dreadful scheme. But she is our all, how could we turn her away forever? Ob! oh! oh! ¢T am afraid that there is a mis- understanding here," said Me. sythe. 'It will soon Le explained.' A sharp ring at the bell, here brokein. ¢ There! There they are. Oh, Mrs Forsythe support me. You are a mother, you can understand a moth- er"s heart," and Mrs English, appa rently well nigh bereft of her senses, ret's a firm hold of Mrs For sythe's arm, and clutches harder, as the steps in the hall approach. And poor, bewildered Mrs Forsythe, for- getting her own trouble, in the ap prehended calamity, Mr Forsythe, applying the viniagrette to a totally unconscious nose, the maid bath. ing the brow of her mistress, and Mr Epglish, with his hands under his coat tails, and his eyes fixed on the floor, altogether drew up a most patl etic picture, and upon it the door swung slowly open. A young lady ina heavy velvet cloak, r.ch sitk walking dress, and 1a set of white ermine furs,-and a black velvet hat with snowy plumes set jauntiy an her flowing curls, stood eyeing them, vith a half pleading, half defiant expression on her heautiful face. At the sight of ker the poor moth- os screamed ¢ © ¢Oh Fannie! OL! Where the viper, the wretch, the--the--' J you mean my husband, wa, here he is,' said the beauty, coolly, at the same time drawing in from the darkuess, a tall, handsome fel- low, big enough to eat little Mrs English up alive. * Monster !' she shrieked. 'Why! Dear me! madam, how can you ?* cried Mrs Forsythe- t "What do yon mean ?' «Why it's our Dwight. My son.' * Mrs English sprang up, Mr Eng lish and Mr Fors, i bg simuHangous- ly dropped into the nearest chairs, Mrs Forsythe burst out crying, and as we do. feartul plot, For- is xhuidge call ire tbe prétty Fannie ran into Dwight's arms, drying : ¢ You dea, old: darling.' ¢ When the first shock was over there was an explanation, and Fan- 'nie kissed her new papa and mamma you husband said : 'My dear, what kind stone do you suppose they will give me when I die ?' household linen, to last a lifetime; it was rather top much of a good thing bas gained enough to pay for itself in six When a bit of ostrich feather is found by a A Detroit female of twenty five was married to her fifth husband lately, All the gentle- men are alive, and the first four are doing Andrew Jackson was accused of badspell- ing, but John Randolph defended him by declaring that ¢ a man must be a fool wh ¢If this jury convicts, my client, said a Missouri lawyer, rolling up Lis sleeves and ¢ I shall feel compelled to meet each one and ham- mer justice into his soul through nis head: A quarrelsome couple were discussing the subject of epitnphs and tembstones, and the of a A demure citizen 'wis wal n down town one mornin, -- ooh when a stranger accosted him : "Do you know where the Post is?' " Yes," answered the oo der, affably, and walked on with hor an ther olay. After "about ten steps he looked back nd, in quiredin his turn, " Why ?. Did you want to knqw ?* the victim with great and then, do eto * replied balanced, th: two k hi gravely and walked oft towards' ls mouth, 498 A noted horse jockey "down ast" was awakened ory aut by gy wl lept thunderstorm.- Being somewhat timid he awoke his wife with "wife! wife ! do you suppose the day of Judgment ve Uo you suppose the Day 'of J ment has come ?"' Shat up you ool was the affectionate reply ; OW car the day of Judgment come in ithe night 2" The other day Mr Jinglebill want- ed to amuse the children and took home one ot those little steam loco- motives. Mr Jinglebill i is not mich posted} in machinery of 1his kind, ut he fired the the thing up. When it got hot it began to move; in: ar-- regular order at first, but in a few seconds it got to boiling. = Faster und faster it went around the room knocking the baby over and com- pelling Jinglebill to get upon a chair, and howl, and diving at Jinglebill's head twisted his nose one side and peeled four or five quare inchost of his scalp off. After it had paid its pects to compelling Jinglebill in this way, it encountered one | of his overshoes, and bounced upon "the dihing-room table, holding high car- nival with the. crockery ; i and then itsped off and whirled, sizzing and spluttering into the kitchen where it got into a pan of bread dough, car- rying the cat along with it, and af- ter w vinding around two or three times got out of breath, and stopped Mrs Jinglebill put ona pair of buck- skin gloves and captured the wreck- ed machine, while Jinglebili took the broomstick and captured the cat. ° A young lady recently said : Some men are always talking about pat- ronizing their own tow n--always harping Bon that daty--and yet they go abroad to get married, while | | ¢ Brimstone, my love," was | the affactionate reply. here wo all stand waiting! 1 do be . hope that some of those men who | Whe isa young lady like a whale?--| a. ry Eastern women will get | when she's pouting. cheated !' | Two Irishmen were in prison--one for 3 | stealing a cow and the other for stealing a ¢ Hullo, Mike, an' sure what o'clock ! watch. { is it ?' said the cow-stealer, ¢ An' sure,' Raid | the watch-stealer, + knew I had just had the small pox,' that is nothing,' was the reply for this is th first time I've been out since I had it my self.' found in the most simple occurrances, the Terre Haute depot recently an old lad attempted to get off while the cars were i motion. door prevented her. it will be warning to somebody else.' the drama, 1tis time to say half. large her father's feet are." years old. to include also married people and passed. particles of granite formation, proverb about stones and glass houses. drinking again to-day.' a drop yoursel', meenister 2' ¢ Yes, John'; mine,' ¢ Very true, sir,' says John; 'bu were kept so clean ?' tell you that.' every one kept their ain door clean,' return iu a high state of nervousness. 1 the atmosphere." | then there is surely one lets villain in + | world, a maiden most casily forgets is looks--hence mirrors were wmvented." | other day living with another wonian. I've no time-picce handy but I suppose it's just about milking time.' A portly gentleman crowded himself into a horsecar, next to young gentleman who said: ¢ Perhaps youfwould not crowd here it you t Oh Some useful lessons or examples. may be At A gentleman standing near the ¢ Let her go," exclaimed a kind hearted reporter, ¢ if she gets killed, A good deal has been said about reforming sorfiething about reforming the patrons of the drama, many of whom, just as the curtain is ready to full at the close of the last act,' seize their hats and rush for the door as frantically as it they bad just received the startling intelli- gence that the only saloon in the city would be closed that night in two minutes and a If you asc courting a girl,' says a Califor- nia paper, "stick to her, no matter how There are over ten million women in America and yet Tom Huttin of Georgia bung hiveelf on account of agirl of fifteen In the City Council, Kansas City, a horse railway bill, providing that ' no single per- son' should pay of fure more than five cents, was amended on motion of Alderman Black, ¢ Dwellers in crystal palaces should refrain from the propulsion of irregularly shaped ! is the way in whieh a California editor puts the English but you must look at you circumstances and can you tell me how the streets of Jerusalem ¢No Jon, I eannot ¢ Well, sir, it was just because A Hartford gentleman who tarried late at a wine supper, found his wife waiting his 'Here 've been waiting and rocking in a chair till head swims round like a top." 'Jess so oY I've been," aesponded he; "it's .in Emerson says : "The way tn make the world better is by reforming number one, the " The one thing," says Jean Toul, " which how she " Farewell, Susan--yon have driven me to the grave," wrote John Larke, of Alabama four years ago, and left the note on the river bank. He was arrested in' Cincicpati the A beau of Irisburg, Vi took bis girF in Well Eo Hn ; then a on a wood sleigh that # A Nebraska Journal invitingly says :--¢ Who says Farmers cannot 1 get rich in this State ? Fifteen years ago a young man came to this State without a dollar in the world Last week he went out of the State, carrying with him the sum "of one dollar and thirty-eight ¢ cnts, the savings of fifteen years of frugal lite Come West young mun, come west' ¢| What will not women do says a Brooklyn paper, for the man she loves 7-- Her hand was the first to reach and 'drag, The bottle from the shelf-- "It is your curse, dear John,' she said And drank it up herself" L 3 Yi © Well, n neighbor, what is the most christian news this morning," said a gentle. man to his friend. I bave just bought a barrel of flour for a poor woman." Just like you! Who is it you have made ha with your charify this time 77 "My wife.' " Well, Sambo, what's yer up to nowa- days 7" i O, I is a carp'uer and jiner'-- "Het T que S$ yer what department do yer perform 27 w What department > Why ¢ | de circular work." What's dat 7 Why, 5 turns de grindstone--g'way." Some men never lose their presence of mind. In Milwaukee last. week a man threw his mother-in-law out of a window in the fifth story of a burning building and carried a feather bod down stairs in his arms. ------ Hear What L. O. L. 162 Says. Bowwaxvitre, March 14.--The members of the Princess Louise Xu QT. No) 162,31 a meeting | on Thursday, passed the following } reso- lution :--That we, the met bes of the Princess Louise L O 1; No' 162, have learned with regret the action of the present Ontario Government in defeating the Orange Incorpora- tion bills, record our disapproval of the same, and that wé will "use all legal means to defeat any 'éandidate tor Parliamentary honors who sup- ported them in their arbitary pro- ceedings. rh ---- A -- dn 'All Right Boys, ¢ John,' said a clergyman to his man, 'you - di should be a teetotaler; you have been ¢ Do you ever take Stick. to if. Atthe Annual meeting' of 'the Provincial Grand Chapter of 'East ti ern Ontario, held in Pakenha: ham, 8 resolution was pope disap ving ot the course the Ontario Bars ment took in rélation to' the Orsngd incorporation bill, and promising to do all in their power to: defeat: the candidates for the eoming, Slaction who stood with tue Government o tl'is questidn. «7 Well Done for the 'Brave Sth of Crispin.' wi ion ads New Yorx, March 14--The has ended at last, The would not a weshpd itd) Es ju 3 day | have compromised with paying 'them on' Pit 'work Tedviag 'fhe themsslves, uly afew 4 nae ployed ds {oem Noy ol ES