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THE DAILY BRITISH WHIG. y Daily and em by BRITISH - WHIG PUBLISHING CO, LIMITED «+ Presiden «» Editor and Director $80e| the inescapability of the conclusion OUT-OF-TOWN REPRESENTATIVES: ¥, Calder, 23 St, Jehn St, Montreal ¥. W. Thompson ....100 King St. W. Torrents, published Letters to the kditor are actusl name of the ouiy over the writer. Atinched is one of the best job printing offices in Canadas, The circulation of THE BRITI>H WHIG is authenticated by the ABU Audit Bureau of Circulations --_-- ; Life is just one darned detour af- ter another. -------- The girl of the period comes to a full stop. ---------- The greatest enemy of law and or- der is one dead-letter law. seldom or 'Bophistication is just /a slow and "painful process of getting fed up. College: An institution that oper- ates in conjunction with a football team. -------------------- To say that virtue is its own re- ward is to intimate that vice pays a profit. ------ The difference between statesman- ip and politics is that we still have ' politics. The artists who draw the fashion pletures draw mostly on their imag- ination. ------------ The one woman missionary left in Bmyrna has a glowing lecture fleld before her. A centenarian says to avold wor- ry; but, then, some would have no employment. Suspenders are coming back with a rush, says a haberdasher, They Bold up the hip pocket. i Most of the things men fight for 'could be purchased with the money 'ewended in the fight. We may yet find the portraits of pretty men placed in cigarette pack- ages to encourage sales. After all, about the only aiffer- ence between this and earlier civilis- _ ation is in the speed limit. An educated man is one who can distinguish between a Greek letter fraternity and a Chinese general, The more things the customer galls for, the better the merchant is . Until he calls for a blank cheque. Nearly all the No. 13 collars are to men who use that insulting of voice when talking on the Let's see; wasn't Greece the little try that thought it could grow t without any advice from the ted farmer is abroad at 4 am. in rder to get an early start waiting for bedtime. ties if wives . should develop n the back seat; "I never like to Job with that of preaching. | cepted the office | Included doing the hanging for. the TAKE YOUR CHOICE. The squirrels and cotton-tail rab- bits of the scientific east have chal- lenged the Yakima Indians and thelr claim to methods of formulating in- fallible forecasts of the weather, The issue is squarely and sharply joined, and t¥a contestants are lin- ed up, and the safest place for non- combatants is well back of the side lines, wishing, "May the best proph- et win." The Yakimas are on record as declaring that all their . lore points to an early fall and a long, cold winter, something after the Hi- awatha brand. Back of this declara- tion is another that not one of their forecasts has ever been reversed or revised. But--the squirrels and rabbits of the east have not put on their aa- tumn fur, which is Interpreted by those who know squirrel and rabbit habits to mean that the beginning of cold fall weather is well in the fu- ture. The value of this condition and its interpretation lies in the co- incidence that usually both squirrels and rabbits are fixed up in their new fur by this date in September. Hence that if furred animals that know their business will not be prepared for cold weather for a long time, cold weather will be a long time in coming. It's a fair fight. ~ A DISAPPEARING CRAFT. In these days when conviction for murder is the most uncertain of things, it not to be wondered at that the business of hangman has so declined that an Iowa preacher found it possible to combine the He ac- of sheriff, whica county, but was compelled to relin- quish one or the other occupations, because his parishioners objected to the combination. Nor is the hangman's business any better in this country. It is worst of all in New Brunswick, where a man sentenced to be hanged was glv- en a reprieve of three weeks because no ode could be found to hang him. The sheriff declared himself too nervous for the job, and was unable to secyre a substitute. Ellis, the Montreal hangman, sued by his wife for maintenance, told the court that he was unable to pay it because his business had so fallen off. He expressed himself as hopeful of better ttmes, and he had some reason for the hope, since he was brought into court while on his way to Vancouver to hang three men. 3 Although all are familiar with the remark that hanging is too good for some persons, few will regret the decline of the hangman's professiou. IN A HURRY. A citizen who is an observer of human nature remarks #hat it is the "hurry bug" that causes most of the accidents, He thinks it is almost as definite a. thing as thé bookworm, which makes people unnaturally and insufferably slow. It simply works in the opposite way, developing a mania for speed. The victime of this mania imagine they have to be always going at maxi- mum velocity. They try to keep up their speed regardless of obstacles, laws or other people's rights, Sa they are always getting smashed up, or smashing up womebody else. And what does it get them, even #f they escape violent danger? In plunging across town at break-neck speed they may save, if they are fucky, say five or {en minutes. What do they do with the time saved? They waste it, in all probability, smoking or chatiing, to relieve the strain. Or else they plunge just as feverishly into their work, and was e the time saved, or more, by nervous and unwise action. It is all right 40 be in a hurry, but all wrong to have one's mind in 8 hurry. The biggest and most success- ful men, the men who get the most done, are nearly always men who do not let themselves get hurried, and who therefore see clearly and act calmly and make no mistakes. THE CZAR'S JEWELS, Capt. Kidd's burled treasure and all the other pirate loot, which have inspired a certain school of roman- ticism since the freebooters ranged the Spanish Main, seems destined to be forced Into a secondary place by some trinkets of great price which have passed from their previous es- tate into the realm of mystery in the whirl of recent world happenings. The royal jewels of Russia, which disappeared at the same time the last of the czars made his tragic exit, although not mellowed by the ro- mance which could hardly exist so close to the deed that ended the lives of Nichol and the members of his family, are nevertheless the cause of many creepy tales, many mysterious insinuations as to present whereabouts, and the substance for invelgling many ducats from the pockets of covetous individuals. When the steamship Majestic reached New York a day or two ago customs officers were on hand In extra force to search the vessel on the "tip™ that there was a mau on ne board with a quantity of the esar's | jewels, to dispose of to rich Amerl- cans. Al the searchers found were a few thousand dollars' worth of or- dinary -dlamonds and other gems that some passengers had not declar- ed. At intervals various million- dollar pearl necklaces belonging to late members of the Russian royal famfly have been "located" in ths possession of some of the newly rich. More weird tales may be ex- pected until they gather the flavor of pirates' plunder. Meanwhile, they probably will in- stigate an industry unequalled even by that of manufacturing "originals" of the old masters for sale to ama- t art collectors. Ti NEWSPAPERS' JOB. The city of Vienna, Austria, has been without newspapers for a week and one of the most siriking results, according to correspondents, has been the circulation of sensational rumcrs that have mot the slightest founda- tion in fact. Reports "by word of mouth" have told of the murder of statesmen and of all sorts of disas- ters, and naturally have greatly ex- cited the public. It is significant that these rumors were all of an alarming and depress- ing character, and also "hat no such reports were in circulation before the suspension of the newspapers. When the press was functioning, canards of this nature would have been short- lived. The explanation is simple. A citizen who hears a sensational story looks in his newspaper for confirma- tion. He finds no mention there and wisely concludes that the story could not have been true. If the story had circulated sufficiently to~ warrant a newspaper in taking notice of it, then the reader found the authoritative denial. But where there are no news- papers rumor gets in its deadly work. This was particularly true in early times when there 'were no printed mediums of general information. The people were constantly excited over reports of strange happenings, re- poris that expanded with each repeti- tion. During the great war there were many illustrations of how stories spread and of the function of the newspapers in stopping the progress of falsehoods. Every editor r bers the yarns about the shooting of spies at training camps, the "two nurses from Belgium with tHelr hands cut off," the attempts to se. fire to public buildings, ete. With- out newspapers there would have been no way to squash these stories. 'When their press resumes business, the people of Vienna will learn what really has been taking place, and they will wonder why they were so credulous when all these silly stories were flying about. BY SAM HILL | ALONG LIFE'S DETOUR | Poor Girls, Cold winter comes apace, When girls must face the breeze, With little on their backs And nothing on thelr knees Observatiohs of Oldest Inhabitant. I kin remember when the only time a man could get an'eyelul of lingerie and hosiery was when he rubbered at the clothes lines. . site ; Ne Joke, : 5 sThis item says there was once & time when man was without fire," re- marked Mrs. Grouch. "Yes," growled her husband, "and at the present prices for coal it looks as if we were going to be without it this winter ourselves." The Corn Was on conn; HBTS (McCreary Qounty (Ky.) The George Humble family Gad & corn dinner with the E. J, Cobb fam- ily Sunday. To a Modern Girle A hero is Most any gink Who always has A lot of chink. More Important. Efficiency Expert: "I can show you how to make money." Tired Business Man: "I can make money, but what I want is some one to show me how to say it when it is going out faster than it comes in." * N-- Fool Questions. WW. N. H. asks: "Does a dog ever wear patches on its pants?" Sic him, Towser! -- More About Girls: ik strange, strange girl 1s Susie Plumb; She ne'er seems To park her gum. ~--Waghington (D. C.) Herald. She's strange, all right-- Most girls, I'll swear, Will always park Theirs on a chair, No Mattgr What It Weighs It Is a Large Baby, (Birth Note in Toledo Blade) Girls--Mrs. Frank Large, R. F. D. 1 Oh, Look Who's Herel Dear Sam: Here is your chance. Goodman & Beer. orang up for Businesy tn Now A BIBLE THOUGHT FOR TO-DAY ASK WHAT YB WILL:-- If ye abide in me, and my words abide in you, ye shall ask what ye will, and it shall be done uato you~-- John 153 7. I ---- was in gean Jt knocked him down and broke his right leg in two places below the knee. ---- No Joke. I'd a heap rather see A dog that wags its taf§ ' Than have to listen to A wag who tells a tales. ~Cincinnatdi Enquirer. The dog doesn't talk, As it wags its tall, But not so with The waggish male. We Can't See Them, Either. "Pa," sald Clarence. humor for foolishness," warned his dad. "Well," grinned Clarence, "I just wanted to ask you if, when an eye- tooth got old, you had to buy glasses for it." Folks, Mit These New Members. Dear Sam: Mary Etta Fox lives on the Trace Roace road, near here. Allie Lane can be found at Sommer- ville and William Tellus at Gratis, Ohlo. C. 8. Stubbs, Weit Elkton, Ohfo. ola Daily Semtence Sermon. Never call a man down unless you are able to stand up to h'm. News of the Names Club. Lotta Foulks of Independence, Mo. has just been married and we suppose it won't be long before she hears her husband growlin' about thelr visit' 'em so much. 'Will Ledbetter is Dallas--but did he? reported from Ouch ! "Hasn't your husband kissed you recently? asked the Judge. "Oh, yes, he kissed me last night," replied the fair applicant for a di- vorce. "H'm, then what are you complain. ing about? the Judge asked. "The hall was dark, and he mistook me for our pretty maid," she snapped. Warren (Ohio) Tribune. "Be careful, young man, I'm in no BIBBY'S Kingston's One Price Clothing Ready-to-Wear and Made-to= Store Measure. Our New Fall Suits Are Now Ready See Our $25.00 Young Men's Suits THE ASTER New ' Brown, new Greens, New Greys. SEE OUR PURE WOOL Indigo Blue Suits $28.50 SEE OUR Handtailored, West England f Worsteds, in Greys, Blue/ Browns and Green, at $37.50 . Our Canadian Question And Answer Corner Q.--Where ds Canada's million- acre farm? A.--Canada's million-acre farm is In Prince Edward Island of over a million acres of arable land, eighty per cent, of the population living on agriculture direct. Q.--Where does Canada stand in wheat production in comparison with the rest of the world? A~--Canada ngw has risen from third to second place among the wheat-growing ' countries in ' the world, the United States coming first. Canada's wheat production in 1921 of 263,000,000 bushels, show- ed an increase of 70 per cent. in 10 years, -------------- CANADIAN PACIFIC. Kingston Subdivision Train Service. Effective Sunday, October 1st, 1922, following trains will be restor- ed: No. 618, leave Kingston 11.45 a.m., due Tichborne 1.20 p.m., Shar- bot Lake, 2.25 p.m. No. 615, leave Kingston 4.15 p.m., due Tichborne 6.456 pm. No. 612, leave Sharbot Lake, 12.40 p.m., Tichborne 2.03 p.m., due Kingston 3.30 p.m. No. 616, leave Tichborne 6.05 p.m., due Kingston 7.35 p.m. Close connec- tions for Ottawa, Montreal, Peter- boro, Toronto and intermediate points. City Ticket Office, 180 Wel- Ungton street. S--t-- Militia orders announce the retire- ment as Officer Commanding the 8th Infantry Brigade of ILfeut, Col. D. R. Street, Ottawa, who on com- pletion of his term of ofMoe is trans- ferted ¢o the Reserve of Officers 'with the rank of colonel. The man who studies to make him- self conspicuous often makes him- self ridiculous. SPECIAL We Are Headquarters Tire Sale THIS WEEK ONLY CORD TIRES 32x3} von... $22.00 34x4} .........$38.00 35x5 ieeieoni- $48.00 30x3% 30x3% NON-SKID EXTRA SPECIAL 4 8. 7 5 TUBE $1.35 All Tires Absolutely Guaranteed, NO SECONDS MOORE'S SICK-ROOM SUPPLIES Dr. Chown's Drug Store 185 Princess Street. Phone 848 A HS ns AA Pivmber Plumbing and Gas Work a spec falty. All work guaranteed. Ad. dress 145 Frontenac Street. "See the Working Electric Train in Our Windows" TOYS. TIRES. McCLARY'S "OANADA™ BRAND ENAMEL WARE PRESERVING KETTLES in finest grade made. Mottled Blue out* side and white lining. A complete assortment and low priced. BUNT'S HARDWARE King St. lights, gas, 3 piece caton--Barrie Street. 237 Bagot Street House--Solid brick, 8 rooms, § bedrooms, electric lights, gus, 8 plece bath; furnace in fine location, on Johnson Street, House, solid brick, 2 story and attie, 11 rooms, 7 bedrooms, eleetric hot water heating, hardwood floors Ist and 2ud fiat) excellent cellar, sun porch; all newly decorated. Excellent lo lon, The Telgmas School of . usic Plano, violin and other stringed in- struments. Alida V. Te n, B.E., teacher of Elocution and isarie sys tem of Physical Culture. may begin at any date. Terms on applica- 484 BROCK ST. 'M. B. TRUMPOUR |_ ne Ts - "Phones 704 or 1461w 4 The HEAD OFFICES - Fred M. Clow. Going up! What? The record of ; ® : Sores, od poadi Shout 80 ondon Life ||: =: Insurance Company FR - LONDON, CANADA Agencies in all principal cities W. Walters, BITUMINOUS Egg and Stove Size Particularly adapted for Hot Alr Turnaces and Quebec Heaters, Price $15.00 2 Crawford COAL Phone 9. Foot of Queen St.