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PAGE 4 â€" WATERLOO CHRONICLE, WEDNESDAY, JULY 7, 1993 Being the publisher and columnist of a newspaper that‘s chroniâ€" fair city is always challenging. Uh, not nearly as challenging, however, as minding three youngâ€" sters in a women‘s fashion outlet while your wife tries on the specâ€" trum of summer sale sizzlers. Not by half. Now, not that Beth does a lot of shopping (heh heh, heh heh) but the times are few and far between that she gets a few moments to herself to try on some clothes. So when the brood is out and about and the opportunity arises, I encourage her to wade through the wardrobes. Just such an occasion surfaced last week during our most enjoyable miniâ€"jaunt to Niagara Falls with the boys. + "There‘s only about one or two things I want to try on, do you mind watching the boys?" Beth asked graciously. "Of course not, you take your time." Duh, duh duh dubhhhhhhhhh. Now, I‘m uncomfortable in women‘s shops at the best of times, but even more so when I‘m expected to hover close to the change room and offer up opinions. I usually do a lot of feet shuffling, hum a few tunes, and â€". "Drew, get back here, out of that rack of clothes, leave that hanger alone, sit here nicely, Mommy only has one or two things to try on and then we‘ll get ice cream if you‘re good (solid parental tactic.) The slippery slope. I was on it, dead centre. "Jordan, could you please not push the stroller into the aisle, that woman is trying to get past and..." "So Rick, what do you think of these pink jeans?" ; "Gorgeous. Buy them." . "Too big, do you think you could check at the front rack to see if they have one size smaller?" "Sure. Do you â€" Drew, stay out of Mommy‘s dressing room while wmdwaéplfibyfimqe!f. she‘s trying on clothes, give her a moment to â€"" "Mommy let‘s me." "That‘s when you‘re with Mommy but not me, now stay out here and â€" Jordan, where‘s Jordan?" "Right here behind you Dad. When are we going for ice cream?" "Soon, Jordan, Mommy just has two things to try â€"" Another woman entered the change area, gave me a dirty look, and to counter, I picked up Chad and kissed him on the forehead to represent myself as the allâ€"Canadian Dad. He began to cry. "Why‘d you pick Chad up, Dad?" queried Jordan legitimately. "He "Well uh, I suppose, I was trying not to look..." "Could you give her these blouses, I think they compliment her pants wonderfully, see what she thinks." "Could you please give them to her yourself, I uh, don‘t want to, uh, leave the kids alone, yes, that‘s it, I must stay here, out here, with the kids." I could see the bottom of the slippery slope approaching. "Oh, they‘re really acting up out here aren‘t they‘" said Beth. "T‘ll hurry and just be a minute, I can‘t make up my mind about the one I brought in or the one the saleswoman brought in." "Take your time, the boys are fine, you never get a moment to yourself," I said, reading directly from Martyr‘s Digest. "Just relax and take your â€" no Drew, don‘t put that necklace over your head, and leave the ohh, I can‘t even say the word, alone too. They‘re not brhuyl.dufngru"hudllnmt' "Chad, Chad, it‘s OK, little guy, Mommy‘s just trying on two things and then we‘ll be going for ice...but why am I telling you?" "Chad can‘t have ice cream yet, Dad." "Thank you Jordan. Don‘t push that stroller, don‘t push Drew, both of you, sit on this seat and be good or there‘s no ice cream for either of you." "This one and this, and this, what do you think?" "Gorgeous. Buy them. And Drew gets no ice cream until he takes off those, those, well, you know, thingies." Some places I‘m out of my element "Sorry, Jord, you‘re right, I was just â€"* "Excuse me sir," said the saleswoman, "your wife is in the first "Anything you say." Published every Wednesday by _ The Fairway Group Incorporated 215 Fairway Rd. 8., Kitchener, Ont. July 7, 1993 es L0 0_ THAT‘S LIFE Wéfl R T BLITZ« ! ;WW&Emm Nanowmoe Lirenue GUARANTEES wume OPEN MON. â€" SAT. 8 AM TO 6 PM @§ 2XPERIENCE THE S/ Complete Exhaust Service Shocks / Struts + Coil Springs Waterloo 746â€"1070 kss _ _ _ Ds "Conestocn mau 355 Weber St., North (Comer of Weber & Columbia Streets) WEDNESDAY JULY 7th to SUNDAY JULY 11th s"~ / Copyright © Meinaike 1902 | Muffiers _ & s 9g95 | â€" Fits Many Small Domestic Care « Plpes, Clamps & Hangers Exira McPherson Strute Excluded h ze through 10/1508 Meinekse locations only. Per y Goey biye ced rLaven ons bowiny | wnpeod ue Offer vaild through 10/15 Not vaid with any other