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Christmas Section C o 4 ECA Ee CSE S AP. IL ME AP AL. L Advice on What Not to Give as Presents A change is as goodg as a rest, says the old proverb. Well, here‘s your rest in this Christâ€" mas edition, so far as Christmas giving is concerned. As a usual thing, the seriâ€" ous note is the right one in regard to Christmas gifts. People are worried enough about just what to get for who, and how not to forget this or that one, without some smart clerk coming along with jokes to confuse the issue, and still further confuse the buyer. Looking at Christmas from a Slightly Changed Point of View as to Appropriate Gifts. | However, even in such a solemn matâ€" ter as the choice of Christmas gifts there is room for the occasional gleam of humour. Here it isâ€"all the way from Curling, Bay of Islands, Newfoundland, The Western Star of that centre last week publishing the following which will be new to many:â€"â€" Not so long ago that our Oldest Citiâ€" zen would have difficulty in rememâ€" bering it, the matter of giftâ€"choosing was comparatively easy. Martha could always be relied upon to send a knit muffler so that "little Oswald won‘t catch cold." And in return the same venerable lady would have been shockâ€" ed right out of her rocker if she had reâ€" ceived a gift other than the embroiderâ€" ed contrepiece that reminded her of the Yuletide‘s arrival. In those days, grandfather awaited with trepidation the simultaneous arâ€" rival of Christmas and the inevitable pipe "from his loving grandchildren." Ang Dad got his customary packet of variâ€"hued ties and galluses. Weeks before Christmas, mother walked about the parlour moving bricâ€" aâ€"brac here and there, speculating as to the best place to set the painted china dish that was bound to come. And the children were content with Toyland‘s contribution and the chance to break some of the tree ornaments to hear them "skuash." It‘s all changed toâ€"day. Since the arâ€" rival of movies, Aunt Martha has come to long for one of thos newâ€"fangled teaâ€"wagons; grandfather. much preâ€" fers a "B" battery eliminator; dad‘s bent on having Venus on the radiator cap of his car; mother has her eye on a vacuum cleaner; and the kids want either a cocktail shaker or a set of sashweights. What is the modern giftâ€"giver to do? We don‘t know, but here‘s some of the things NOT to do: DON‘T sengq Aunt Martha a cockâ€" tail shakerâ€"unless it is accompanied by a sheik to shake it. THE PORCUPINE ADVANCE TIMMINS, ONTARIO DON‘T send grandfather a footballâ€" he has enough to kick about already DON‘T send grandmother a shawl She has a boyish bob and they simply do not go together. DON‘T send dad a washboardâ€" Christmas will leave him plenty clean. DON‘T send mother a smoking jackâ€" et. She is smokmcr too many cigarettes as it is. DON‘T send Mrs. Johnson the pickle dish that Mrs. Crabb sent youâ€"unless you first remove the card that came with it. DON‘T attempt to select a pair of knickers for junior. Choosing his own may be the only outlet he has for exâ€" pressing his taste in art. DON‘T send daughter a hair ribbon â€"although it may be the only outward distinguishing mark of her sex. Presents Asked for the Nations of the World The following letter appeared in The World Digest, is given herewith in part. To it might be added the line:â€" For All Nationsâ€"Peace on earth; goodwill tc men. Dear Santa Claus:â€" In order that this Christmas of 1935 may be truly a merry one, please see that the following appropriate presents are delivered to the correct parties: Mussoliniâ€"an English bulldog. League of Nationsâ€"orchids. Japanâ€"a lower birthrate. Russiaâ€"a sense ‘of humour. Chinaâ€"a perception of its dormant power. Franceâ€"a card:;: "Lafayette, where are you?" Ethiopiaâ€"a rainy season from now on. The Christmas bazaar was in full swing when a young man stroilled round the various stalls. He had no intention of buying. As he passed a tastefully decorated stall the pretty saleswoman detained him. sOMETHING THE YOUNG MAN DID USE ONCE IN A WHILE "Won‘t you buy a cigarette holder?" she asked. ‘"No, thanks, I don‘t smoke," was the curt reply. "Then do have this nice box of chocoâ€" lates?" "I don‘t eat sweets." The girl‘s patience was exhausted. "Sir," she said grimly, "will you buy this box of soap?" The young man paid up. "Don‘t bother children tellin‘ ‘em dar aint no Santa Claus," said Uncle Eben. ‘"Dey has been hearin‘ dat ever since dey kin remember, but ‘round he comes punctual every year, jes‘ de same." JUST LIKE OLD SANTA â€"AÂ¥ Wellâ€"Wishetr § THE TIMMINS NEW METHOD LAUNDRY § 57 Cedar Street North Monday, December 23rd, 1935 Phone 153