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A Story of Adventure onjlndlnn River. In two weeks after his arrival from the North Frank Mason was as much at home a on Jupiter Inlet and the St. John’s River sl as any boy in South Florida. In fact, Frank and his mother lived on the river, for near the shore of the lagoon, under the tall palm trees, what had once :1 been a flat- ttomed river steamer was a. drawn up, and this was his home. Its state- t rooms were occupied by the citizens of Orangeville, and the old steamer was by long odds the best hotel in town. But Frank was much more merested in a shallow sKiE manned by an old Seminole Indian, which communicated with the low, sandy beach. The guests of the floating hotel had but to call to “ 01d Firewater ” at any hour of the day or night and a mo- ment later the swish of his paddle would be heard and the skiff come shooting out from a little creek. Frank was not long in discovering that Firewater was no talker, but he also discov- ered what older heads had not noticedâ€"that Firewater was a good listener. He would sit mutely for hours hearing Frank tell how they hunted moose in the Maine woods, or ‘ * ow people in a cold climate lived. Some- ‘ times the old Seminole would show his ap- preciation by taking his little passenger out across the sandy ridge that divides Indian River from the ocean and teaching him to fish for big game. Firewater seldom cou- descended to speak. Once, when Frank asked him to teach him how to swim, the old Indian’s eyes glistened ; without a word he ungirdled himself and sprang into the water of the lagoon. Frank was soon in a. condition to follow, and after that the old Indian and the young New Yorker sported together in the water daily until Frank be- came almost as expert as his teacher. bometimes they crossed the bar, and, an- choring the skiff, swam out into the warm water of the ocean ; but at such times the old Indian would keep his piercing black eyes strained on the distance, constantly 1 turning them in every direction. One day when an odor of watermelon suddenly floated on the breeze he turned Jwiftly with a grunt and struck out for the shore. “ What is the matter 2” asked Frank,but in lieu of a reply Firewater pointed over his shoulder, and Frank saw with a shudder the tips of a shark’s fins not far behind. Safe in the skiff, Firewater broke silence for almost the first time in their acquaintance. He warned the young Northerner never to go in swimming alone, especially upon the ocean side of the reef. AHHMHUB‘E" .__..._._4- I Suddenly the young swimmer drew along ‘ breath, sniffed the breeze again, then his face blanched. A faint odor of watermelon seemed to him to float upon the waves. \Vith a sudden energy he turned toward shore and swam for it with all his might. At every stroke the peculiar odor seemed to grow, until at last the panic-striken boy felt sure that a monster shark was swimming at his side ready to turn upon its back and seize him‘in its jaws. Winter merged into early spring. As the floating hotel became more and more crowded with transient guests Firewater and his skiff were kept busy from morning to night. At first Frank was disconsolate, but with the assistance of the old Indian, who had a few minutes to spare just before sunrise. he huilt a-very ‘creditable boat of ~,,-_--:l- 1 3UJILL39. uv ~_--- -_ his own. Sometlmes' he even prevailei upon his mother to go out for a. row, but more often he spent the day upon the la.- goon alone. A- __..:..~ n‘fnmnn‘n 1'“: ann3 EUULL 0:.qu- One warm spring afternoon he found himself drifting idly toward the inlet. The sky was clear and the water tempting, and his preceptor’s advice was forgotten. He ‘anchored his boat, stripped, and presently was paddling and splashing about in the delicious water. , A hundred yards away a long low, sand bank arose from the water. It was low tide and a foot or two of the dry sand bar lay above the gentle breakers. Toward this Frank made his way, and while yet quite a. distance from it his feet touched the shallow bottom of the lagoon. Once upon the sand bank an irresistible desire to swim out. among the breakers at the other side ceme ever the boy. Up to UIAV v vuv- __ - the very 15 ot where he stood looking npon the ocean, the water was deep; a plunge anda swim! Where was the harm? The old Indian’s advice rang through his brain, but as for a moment he hesitated with his hands upon his head, ready to dive, a piece of sand slipped and he lost his balance and fell splashing into the water, whether he would or no, and a moment later he was out among the ocean swells. ' And everything was forgotten save the pleasures of the moment. ‘ 77-71 YOUNG: FOLKS. " "Zn";£€n'£1§éy7£é Edaiéaz Who sets your moths. Your butterflies too : 'Who mops up the floor When you spill the glue? Who makes you tafi‘y? (I tell you it’s fine!) Who baits-z your book. Untanglcs your line? Who takes out your splinters. ‘V "U 51' v" ’ \Vben you 0111;}; 3: tree? Who bathcs your bumps, As kind as can be! Who guided your 08.. a: The first time you dled. % Who blows your bit 3’ eggs, 31-2!) What! no elder sister? I wouldn't be you} Who buttons your Jacket? Who ties up your shoe 3 Who given ya a boost "‘“ 11â€"h .. (anon! ' .51.} 33â€"5 iminuâ€"tel .W' ho tells you storie-n And sings like a. linnct? No sister} _1bity you, nvuuv “-â€"- __ ~I-Ie tIied in vain to splash the water, but his arms and legs were too weak. It was as much as he could do to guide himself to-1 Ward the bank. i When he was almost upon the sand, with a great effort, he turned to look over his shoulder. It was as he thought. He caught sight of a knife-like fin cutting the water not many yard: behind. Exerting every 112215010 for afinal struggle he reached for the shore, and with a. su- preme effort he clambered out of the water. As he lay exhausted 5- «harp snap and a com- "Ti-my I do: And oh! for a. whole farm I wouldn’t be you. I'IRBWATBR'S SHOT- John'e Sister- ;[Laura E. Richards. mbereu out. OI tne water. A ‘7 u uy , mu. Uvnu .w. .w- ‘. "My- 9. :- sharp snap and a com- young rector’s name is mentioned. motion in the breakers not a foot distant told him he had escaped none too soon. Still panting, Frank stood up on the smooth, hard sea sand.. The monster shark was swimming back and forth. It never for an instant took its narrow little eyes from the naked figure of its postponed sup- per. Frank shuddered and smiled as he thought how he would cheat his sharkship by_simply wading out to his boat. ,‘,AÂ¥_‘-JL- ‘. Awning, “But that smilevsoon changedto an expres- sion of horror, for scarcely had he taken a step down into the shallow water on the other side of the bank when an old log of driftwood suddenly acquired motion and cut through the water toward him. “ Alliga- tors,” gasped the poor boy, as his knees smote together, and quickly running back he stood once more on the sand bank. But the scaly monster came on; as Frank edged away the whole long-brown length of hide- ous scales slowly followed until it dragged itself completely out of the water and waddled forward _upon_ the sand. Frank had had sufficient experience in hunting alligators with Firewater to know that he could keep out of its way on “ dry land,” but the tide was rising, and though it meant only a difi'erence of two feet, even that would submerge the little island at least twelve inchesâ€"and then it would bs on1_y a question of shark or alligator. A "n m..- J :L_-1£ w 1..---_-_ Uni-Twice the hotiriy reptile dFagged itself after the naked boy up and down the little strip of sand, which was even now begin- ning to grow smaller. 13 ‘L. ____.-_-J L-:1 ““‘B " O' ' " W“ . Once a. great sweep of the armored tall almost touched his body. If it had struck him he'would have sailed through the air and landed in the jaws of the patient shazk. An hour passed, and now the alligator seemed content to lie still and follow his victim with his wicked little eyes ; nor was the patience of the shark at all exhausted, and as the island grew smaller and smaller they both drew nearer and nearer. In vain the poor little Northerner called for help. There was no one in sight. As he looked for the last time he thought he saw a small speck on the water of the la.- goon, but the setting sun blinded his eyes and he dared not hope. He moved a foot. nearer the watching alligator, away from the waiting shark ; tears trickled down his cheeks. Suddenly the heavy, scaly monster turn- ed slightly and moved forward. The space was so narrow now that the long, lath-like tail dipped into the water of the ocean, and as it touched the waves there was a splash and a scene of wild struggle. The undis- criminating shark, hungry for his supper, had seized upon the alligator’s tail. The great saw-like teeth sunk through the thick armored hide, and with a bark like a dog the enraged reptile turned and slid ofi‘ into ‘ the water. For several minutes the breakers were dyed red with blood. Never for a moment did the tenacious shark release his grip until with a. mighty contortion the agile alligator bent his body double and seized the soft stomach of the shark in his immense jaws. Then the struggle began in earnest, and the two strange creatures rolled over and over in the ocean, but nothing distinct could Frank see through the churning foam. At last all was quiet. Then a heavy body arose to the surface, and the angry, head of the victorious alligator turned in‘ every direction in search of his victim. Suddenly the two bright little eyeslit upon the trembling boy, who now stood ankle deep in water, paralyzed with fear and un- able to move. There was a quick movement and the glittering eyes and ugly snout of the saurian seemed to fairly cleave the water. Frank closed his eyes and fell for- ward, for his trembling legs refused longer ‘ to support his body. There was a singing sound in his earsâ€" then a roar of thunder split the universe, a bright flash filled all the air, and he became unconscious. When Frank next opened his eyes Fire. water was bendAipg _over_}_1ip3, r.ifle in hand. “Ough 1” said the old Seminole. as he lifted the limp and helpless boy into his skiff to wait while he removed the skin from the alligator. . u-r. 01".”_A_ “I‘fiV-Vufiinebo'y min’ Injun nex’ time,” was all Firewater ever said to his young friend. Nor would he explain how he happened to be on hand just at time right moment. ‘11- 1- , wv v.- _.---.. inv. V Frank has nevér rforgoct’ten the old Indian and now every year, whgn spring approach- nuuuv-.'.__JJ,, es, a big consignmeht of arfimquitién finds its way, to Indlan River that makes a. pair of very black eyes sparkle with true hunts- man’s delight. The activity in India of the Anjaman-i- Islam, or Society of Islam, appears from the public statements of its operations to have extended far beyond the establishing of schools or the building of the college at Bori Bunder. It has examined numerous questions bearing on the welfare of the community. It has smoothed the path of the pilgrims to the shrines in Arabia, and collected funds for the repair of the Zuheida Canal, which supplies their needs while travelling in that arid country. It has raised subscriptions to give aid to the wounded and orphans during the war be- tween Turkey and Russia. Near home the ‘ vaccination of the Mohammedan community was promoted by its agency, and the census of the 200,000 Mussulman inhabitants of the city of Bombay,while, owing to the society’s exertions, a library containing a. consider- able number of books in Hindustani, Per- sian, and Arabic, as well as English works. has been established for the use of the poorer classes of the community. Terrible Experiences in a. Typhoon- The Central News states that the J apan- ese mail brings intelligence of the terrible; experiences of the British ship Thomae McLennan. When four days out from Harrodate, Japan, she encountered a. typhoon. The high seas kept the vessel’s deck up to the rail filled with water for 24 hours. Nearly everything movable was washed overboard. The forward-house and forecastle bulkhead were stove in, the engine-room damaged, and the starboard ‘lifeboat smashed and washed overboard. IALu wvu-v w....â€"â€" .- - The port quarter boat was stove in, the port iron freshâ€"water tank burst, seven stanchions gave way, and the main rigging screws parted. Next day the weather moderated, and repairs were commenced. The cargo of sulphur had to be jettisoned to prev ent fire. "She is very high church, isn’t she !” “ Why, she bows he? head whenever’ the - _L-.J_ _-_.- -_ ‘A‘.:A§.AA 7’ Islam’s Activity- The Poor White Problem That Conf The British Empire Helpless Hereditary Pauperlsm the Com- mon Doom or Descendants of Euro- peans Settled Permanently in India, India. has a. “poor white” question that presents one of the gravest social, moral, and political problems with which the British Government is confronted in that remarkable land. It his confronted the Government for many years, growing in gravity as each year has gone by, but all the strenuous efl'orts to remedy, or even to ’ " ‘____1_ :A;IAI‘ Lne strenuous cum U»: uv ....... J , . V palliate, the evil have so far entirely failed. “Hopeless hereditary pauperism seems too be the doom of a large proportion of the mixed and even pure descendants of Euro- 1 peans settled permanently in India,” says; the "London Times. The Lieutenant- ; Governor of Bengal recently appointed a.‘ Commission to investigate the question and its report is charactized as disclosing a state of things “disastrous in itself and dis- creditable to the British name.” Over 22 per cent. or nearly one-fourth of the Eurasians, people of European fathers and native mothers, in the metropolis of India 1 are officially returned as paupers, “actual- ly traced out as in receipt of charitable relief of one kind or another. This per centage of pauperism is about three times higher than that of the poorest country in England during midwinter. ,_A_i_ -L‘J a- unlunnat‘ uufanwuu uu.--.° -___v ,, The Commission was instucted to suggest some remedy, but it regrets that it has no adequate remedy to propose. It suggested . some palliatives, which are said to have scarce touched even the surface of the evil, and the latest official attempt to deal with the poor white question is acknowledged but another failure. It remains a. problem, “ whose distressing aspects the Government sorrowfully acknowledges, but for which it has been unable to find a. solution.” .11!- LIKED Vvvu ‘Illul-Pv-V -v _ There are, according to the report, 247,- 642 Europeans and Eurasians in India. Sta- tistics show that only one-third of this number are employed in the military and civil establishments oi the Government, and including even the employees of the rail- roads, only 91,000 in all of the number come under the head of “ officials.” Outside of these people satisfactorily employed and accounted for there is a European popu- lation of about 77,000 and a Eurasian com- munity of some 80,000. The half-breeds are classed with the whites especially with the poor whites. Of course they cannot under any- circumstances, because of re- ligious bars. and especially the impassable barriers of caste, have any part with the native population, even with the very poor- est and lowest caste among the Hindoos. ‘What to do with the Eurasian has always been a prominent and difficult question. The native papers say. “ Deport him ;” the White prints say, “Make him a soldier,” and the Eurasian himself says, “ Make me a Commissioner ; give me a. pension.” * - ' 1 y _ _ [IAâ€"“,1 EL UUluuuaaLuuv. , 3.. .. __-- -_ The latest solution of the problem offered is perhaps more remarkable and interesting for the character of the premises stated than for the nature and possibilities of the remedy offered. It is put forward by Sir Theodore Hope, late Public \‘Vorks Minis- ter of India, and a distinguished authority on matters of Church and State in India, and practically it is the suggestion to Chris- tianize the Christian population, the poor whites and Eurasians. The proposer says that the ecclesiastical establishment in India is utterly unable to supply the spir- ‘ itual needs of the Europeans and Eurasians, lwho are now dotted in groups and small ' communities all over the vast peninsula of India. The Government keeps up a corps of clergy to look after the spiritual welfare 1 ,1_- _...L....- any-nah: +n UL VIVIEJ vv ow â€"_ -V..-_,, of the “ officials,” and also makes grants to t] the Christian sects generally, but the pro- n vision is insufficient, and the large body of i Europeans and Eurasians, not “officials,” s would be almost entirely without benefit of clergy but for aid from England. Of course g there are missionaries a-plenty, but their 1 work is to convert the natives, and they 2 are so stationed, in native inhabited regions, 1 that they are out of touch altogether with their brethren among the poor whites. : Many European stations are visited once, 1 ‘ twice or thrice ayear by aChristian clergy- 1 man, while some quite large groups of Eur- ( ope-ans Hand Eurasians receive a flying I visit once a year. Consequently, as Sir Theodore Hope shows, the poor whites ‘ and half-castes are without religious train- ‘ ing oi any sort, and “ mulitudes of ' white and semi-white boys and girls are growing up to adolescence in a tropical climate without, in many cases, any church teaching whatever.” This painfully inade- quate provision for the religious and moral training of the pure and mixed descendants of Europeans in India places them at se- rious disadvantage compared with Hindu, Mohammedan, and Parsee communities, ’ which are trained from earliest childhood ‘ under a most rigid system of religious obli- : gations and sanctions which exercise an im- '- mense influence on their consciences and l lives, and undisputably for great good. u Sir Theodore Bope does not say this is the , sole, or even chief cause of the acknowledg- ; ed dire poverty and deep degradation of , the poor whites of India, but he asserts it : is a powerful cause, and as he has had the , very best means of learning the economic: ;, as well as the religious aspect of the matter s he is accepted as a strong authority. The e s remedy proposed is mainly to increase the number and eflieiency of the clergy in In- dia, and attempt to Christianize and moral- ly educate the poor whites. It is indeed a 5 situation full of material for moralizing ' that while such remarkable efforts are mak- ing for the conversion of the natix‘es of In- dia to Christianity those born into the faith EURASIAN S 0F INDIAo and classed as representatives of it- are so utterly neglected, and with such deplorable results, results that some do not hesitate to call a scandal to the_Christian name. 77. “-3 0U Dual. 0- uvtunluu- -v ...e The Government of India is not engagedr l in. the business of converting the heathen to : Christianity. It respects the religions of . the natives under its rule, and views with impartiality Hindu. Mohammedan, Parsee, and Christian. 'It assxsts the native reli- gions with capitation grants, just as it pro- vides a Christian establishment for the “ official” European population and assists various Christian sects, and with just re- gard to the difference in numbers of adher- ents. The grants to native religions aggre- gate an immense sum, something like eigh- teen or twenty million of dollars yearly. The Indian people are so essentially ‘ religions that they expect the Government to care for the religious establishments, and accept the taxation for that purpose gladly. It seems to cost a great deal more to supply the spiritual needs of a European than those of a. native, according to the figures given. fronts “But,” says Sir Theodore hope, "mus ID the case in every branch of the administra- tion. The English magistrate, doctor, sol- dier, policeman, newspaper editor, is a. more costly article than his native equivalent.” But the details of the scheme to remedy or palliate the poor white evil by religious ef- fect are many and not interesting at this distance. Many competent critics are in- clined to believe the plan may eflect some. good but a. real. comprehensive solution of the serious “ poor White” problem is not in sight and in view of past failures, is almost despaired of. The situation is progressive- ly serious, and the part the “ poor white” factor will play in India’s future is a matter of grave concern. Grinding (‘arc and Greedy Thrift Seen in the Faces of the People. We are always hearing, says the St. James Gazette, in England about our “gay neighbors ” across the silver streak, but after living among the French on the east- ern frontier these last few months I confess I can never hear them called merry with - out laughing. Wise, solemn, prudent, careful, if you willâ€"but merry never ! Yet lthey must have been ,a. gay folk once, or else where did the prevailing notion come from? Perhaps the weary end of the century has infected them with its ennui, or the war and the weight of the indemnity have crushed their old spirits. At all events, the gayety of the French Nation is some- how eclipsed, in the provinces at least, and the people have forgotten how to enjoy themselves. We talk about our dull Brit- ish Sunday, and revile it in French, as though we could learn a lesson from over; the water. So we might, perhaps, from Paris ; but in.the country, no 2 The British laborer enjoys his Sunday infinitely more than his French equivalent. At least he rests. The French peasant sweats over his field as much on the dimanche as any other day. There is not a particle of difference between ounday and week-day hereabouts, There is no rest for the manâ€"and it is his own fault; but one cannot help pitying the ‘_ poor patient oxen and horses, who never get a day OE and have no choice in the matter. -- J _-.‘..Aw “13:00:11 You can see the grindingcare and greedy 1 thrift which fill the lives of these people in I their faces. They are not a lovely folk, these ever-toiling French peasants. The long struggle for land and money has pre- maturely aged them, and the wizened look of the inveterate miser is on their careworn features. How they love the soil 1 Irish ‘ “ land-hunger” is nothing to it. These French peasants scrape and scrape and toil and toil to add a foot of ground to their property. Of course they are owners of their land, not tenants; and dearly do they love to pinch themselves to increase it. A farmer close by draws a rente of something i like 100,000 francs a year ; yet there he is, a. l working away in his fields like any plow- ’ man, dressed in his worst clothes, as intent . on gain as ever. On the high road dwells ! quite a rich man ; yet he and his wife and four children live in three wretched rooms like a laborer’s family without the least pretension to comfort. Of course there is‘ scarcely any distinction of classes. Every 3,___ _ .. .J mnAomn'. . 1 DUGAL Uta] own" \..-. v---- -_ - ,, one is monsieur or madame ; and madame; often wears no hat; and throws but a. shawl * over her shoulders, rich as she may be and: fully prepared to give her daughter an excel- { lent dob. \Vealth does not bring comfort, ’. {our children live in three wretcnea rooms - likealaborer’s family without the least pretension to comfort. Of course there is , , scarcely any distinction of classes. Every dont know. mum. Xou see we’ve 80" 3 one is monsieur or madame ; and madame] good deal of dear we left over from the year WI 1 before and we’ll have to sell that first, be- over her shoulders, rich as she may be and l cause it might SPOil: you know.” fully prepared to give her daughter an excel- 1 Sheâ€"“ 0h, do you really know Mr. Frayd~ lent dot. \Vealth does not bring comfort, iedge, who writes those society stories? any more than honest toil brings a. merry 9 Don’t you think he has the most delightful soulâ€"influence. At work or play you never 1 touch?” He (thinking of the late departed hear the jolly song of the plowman or the a V)-â€"“ It doesn’t strike me that way. But whistle of his boy. Every body goes at his i he’ll never touch me again if I can helpit.” work solemnly and gloomily._ It is a rare Visitor- (picking up the baby)-“ So this thing t0 hear a servant- singing over her lis the baby, is it? bless his little tootsie- work. gwootsies; thee ! Watch me poke um’s n \r,nL -_ ...:'ll Housekeeperâ€"“ Ice will be very chea . this Summer w0n’t it ‘3” Icemanâ€"“\Yell often wears no hat and throws but a sha Indeed the whole people, of all ages, are subdued and wear a crushed air. Is it the government or the war ‘2 At any rate, vbhe joy seems to have gone out of the lives of young and ald. ‘ They take no interest in A 4.1.- T“..- +kn nwnnna Juana ..-... we. , .. _ anything. Out here in the J ura the proces Panama. does not arouse the smallest excite- . ment. Home politics possesses no attrac- ‘ tion for them. But name Germany or Bismarck and you will find you have touched the sore place. They would fight against Germany while they. could stand. Theyl have many of them been out in 1870 andl can tell long yarns of the warâ€"of lying out! on the hills, of being taken prisoners, and.I all the memories of that awful year. It is the one keen feeling in the lives of these: plodding plowmen, it is their only story. lAnd they would give anything to act it i over again, with a different finale. i News which has been delayed in transit has justbeen received in London of a. terrible disaster on lee_ngea.t.Siberian road. It is ULDWOVU. v.- -___ ‘1, ,7 to the e cct that when within six hours’ ? march of Tomsk, an exile party was caught in a terrific snowstorm, and out of 374 persons only 91 safely reached their destina- tion. In an hour all trace of the road was lost, and in another most of the men were exhausted. One after another the exiles would fall, dragging down those chained to 1 them, the remnant of the party moving on, ‘ desperately and hopelessly. Search parties . found some bodies, but none alive. Six women and four children are said to be among those who perished, and one of the convoy was missing when the message was sent fromTomsk. According to the Moscow Vialomoti, which publishes the account, not less than 62â€"3. very unusual proportionâ€"of the exiles who were lost were “politicals,” and one of the women, Madame Lazarov, was the wife of one of them. A romantic story is related from the City , of Mexico. The Castle of Chepatelpec, the ‘ residence of Senor Refugio Martinez, situ- ated near the city, was entered in broad daylight one day last week by seven mask. ed men, who, after severely beating the owner and his wife, carried olf Martinez’s beautiful daughter, despite her apparently desperate resistance. The police were com- ? munlcated with, and the detectives soon traced the bandits to a fashionable hotel in Mexico, where, to the intense astonishment of the parents of Senorita .Martinez, the young lady was found living with her lover, Don Luis Salazar, a young man belongin to one of the best families of Mexico. He ‘ was arrested, and his sweetheart was forced to return to her parents. A few days after- wards Don Salazar and a party of friends returned to the house disguised as bandits, ’ and a second time abducted the girl, who a was married to her lover on the following says Sir Theodore Hope, “this is 1- u - _.1_.:..€ch~a.. day. Siberian Exiles in a. Snowstorm. Abducted by Bandits. When a. bicyclist gees at bop-speed he very properly calls it a. spin. Where’s the profit when spring makes us hanpy and gay if it makes all the m a feel just the same way? What nonsense it is to say a. clined to be bald. When a. man ing bald it is quite against his i1 1' _ Lug nu-.. -- __ 1 Smileyâ€"“They say Miss Locutte is a perfect witch in full dress.” Wileyâ€"“ Not quite a witchâ€"rather a neck-romancer.” Thirsty Touristâ€"“ Isn’t fifty cen’a wather steep for a. lemonade ‘3” Montm Bartenderâ€"“Steep? Naw! W’y, you went an’ et the lemon 1” .u. 14 Struckileâ€"“I am beginning to one’s ancestors are important.” Mi Beanâ€"-“ Yes, they_ come under the important if true.” Terryâ€"“ How man: the day, Pat 3’” Patâ€" wan O’im afther now, have three.” Creditorâ€"“ The consciences of those two bankrupts appear to be very elastic.” Assigneeâ€"“ Well, don’t you expect elastic- ity in suspenders?” Friendâ€"“ Going to try for a prize essay this term, Sawyer?” Medical Studentâ€" (lowering hlS voice)â€"-â€"“’Sh! Yes. Got a. man hunting a. subject for me already.” “Dennis, you’re a gentleman and a. scholar; is this where you ruminate ‘2” “ Begorra, and you guessed it the first toime ; this is jist Where I room an’ ate.” ,qo‘. .5 Miss Hartâ€"“Which do you think is usu- ally the sillier, the bride or the groom?” Mr. Oldbatchâ€"“ The groom, 0! course That’s how he happens to be a groom.” That Cupid’s ways are careful Is patent at a glance, 'For one never sees his picture With patches on his pants. Mrs. Dixâ€"‘ ‘The law doesn’t treat a wom- an fairly.” Mrs.| Hicks-“ In what re- spect ‘3” Mrs. Dixâ€"“ She is recognized as a‘man’s better half, but if he happens to die ‘ it cuts her down to a. third.” “ Look here,” said the applicant’s friend, “ I’m afraid you are too eager. The office should seek the man, you know.” “That’s all right. But I’m not selfish enough to de- prive the office of a. little judicious steer- ;..... ’3 - mg." . “ This is my youngest boy, Mr. Cynicus,” said the novelist. “They say he is very like me.” “ Does he go to school?” “ Yes. He can read quite well, but as yet he can’t. write.” “ He’s very much like you,” said Mr. Cynicus. Thpugh langupr’s the rule. at this season, , ,I-__. It seemeth in reason quite clear That people should be more elastic When cometh the Spring of the year. “ Well, my dear, how would Farmer Brown suit you for _a. husband '2 He seems uncommon sweet on you lately ‘3” “Perhaps so, father, but his hair is so red thaw” “ True, true, my child; but you should rec- ollect that he has very little of it.” Visitor- (picking up the baby)â€"“ So this is the baby, is it? bless his little tootsie- Wootsies. Kchee ! Watch me poke um’s ribs.” The Boston babyâ€"“ Mother, will you kindly inform me whether the deplor- able condition of this person is due to per- manent dementia or spasmodic and inter- mittent insanity ‘2” Applicant for Insuranceâ€"“ No, sir ; I neither drink, chew nor swear ; I don’t goto the theatre nor attend balls, and have no evil associates. I am a Sunday school beach- er and my morals are above reproach. I never had a day’s sickness in my life.” Agentâ€"that is an extra, hazardous risk young man and we can’t take it.” “A‘p- plicanbâ€"“ What!” Agentâ€"“ No. The good die young, you know.” Victoria’s Arduousl I!‘ an g9fl§€fl9Â¥ a Frequent V Kathi} ‘3 ’3“ 1" ' The time was when only a few knew how heavy is the load of 'worjsuanfi-mnxiety laid ' upon the Queen. Now, happily, theentire’ English people are more $63: legiofiibuéidif it. \Ve are not quite sure, howevgg, that it has struck many'pebp’kr,‘7a§'ii‘€3' 'g’ut to ‘ strike them, that the ”burden becomes heavier year by year. For Her Majesty is not only Queen of Great Brmahaiad hemp? ‘ she is also Empress of India.‘ But ‘ a ‘ofiicial titles by no means express the full extent of her territory or; thelarteaj of her, \ cares and responsibnitigszgg‘gmg gauging} ' of the Foreign oi‘fic‘ezcdnotdhlhowitheabusid ‘ ness of that departm 31555" ' ’ 5111;: . i ‘; ,tJ‘)’ . 35;: 2332391.: mg. at creased in volume ‘ . years, and how itgoesvro 'ma'eu' in: f means augmentation of labor and 301th , to the Crown, Whose wearer, moreover has to inform herself of a world of matters out- o side its jurisdictions In the ded‘ ti -. i to the Queen writtefiiggyaw fifik‘ year after his elevation to e laureate- ship, he aflirmed thatthgoffice held by Her Majesty i: “ II:o:x)lt>,‘1:"7thanarms, or power of brain, or irt .’ ., we :1; ass ’ this was no empty or fiefiéfifia’ufifiWa ‘ 7 It represented a sterling.~.sfact. an; is, then‘ 3 office of august duty ; and when the duty‘is ‘ - adaquately performed, it is unquestionably l the highest conceivable. “ She wrought her people lasting good,” wrote the laureate forty-one years ago. If those words were true then, their meaning has since been yet more strikingly amplified. During a reign which in mere duration has rarelyhe ensur- passed, and in greatness and majesty has :1 never been equalled,the Queen has set,aliks it to the highest and the humblest of her sub- ie jects, the example of what a life should be. r, The moral tone of the nation has been sen- ig sibly raised by one of whom it could be [9 said, forty years ago, “Her court was pure, 30' her life serene.” The perfect serenity was 9!" interrupted by the hand of death ; but sor- dS row only made sense of duty more acute 138. and more perfect. The true and tender ho eulogy uttered by Tennyson in 1851 ha: ng lbeen merited a hundredfold since it an {writ-ten. 5'7me: ass tionp‘ , I u. n. --â€"â€"- â€"“ How many fish have ve hooked Pat 2’” Patâ€"“ W bin Oi’ve got the 1 afther now. an’ two more, Oi’ll SPRING SMILES. A BUSY QUEEN. ireat Erma dIrelti- .ess of hiding}1 Bu't 11$; 0 means express the full itory or the area of her bili't'ieési'” :0 Evans smumnh»! Loe.c¢n"td}bfhow)thwbu§h3 goeéré "ng: Lon of labor and Sammie- inclination. man in il- . think is: Mc- It stun is opprm nerz‘es and muscles l’ose she" and a! brain :1 s exercisa hard labor, but not. to become, and rem Over-weax-iness and injure the brain as t nerwes. To furni: capacity the muscle sufficient amount c will prc-duee matte: feeding :s an injury. brain. Sleep is the indispe during which it tea by the wear of ti strengtk. Good slc requirement. f0 bra: stimulant, and on L1 stance: that prod nerve poiscns, and 1 healthy nerve hygie the human brain ether, cocaine, and never justified exce medicine, cr in ord1 the agony of death Every one who strengthen a healt first, not only hbo: 1y: must. really labt not too little. Fan for a healzhy being; Let any one spend 1 and idleness, and e: be enjoyment. He cial wants in ever i they burden his lif! and more dependen cal horizon will gm and more rigid. Til that is, £15 docilicy‘ become less and lea comprahcnding a thcughts. - J Cnvthe other h the plasticity of 'â€" sdvanoed age. Id the beat brain on old mentally, m. horizon, gnd not We often observe ems becoming. by power ; and highly means of idleness. pcevish, sud now Pitilistincs. with an incredi children pies, cake‘ coffee. pepper, and can cofiect from : globe, and then wo: and nerves are a w teen. We have so and q amine to so dinner. Their pa they endowed film frames and good (I stomachs had bceI lainous hot bread eyrup, strong cofl'e dosed with peppe! ations, that they I young bodies thro the summer seas stimulants show other hand, ch same desks, upo ally bestowed no in the Enjoyment: comprehended in! little fallingfqii: in_ and color “Thich t North.” \Vhy? allowed to take spices, and seldo rich pastry. The islzed on oatmeal with the cream sti wheat flour bread, some. and fruits with not, enough natural acid. The phenomeni most. common an ‘ tions of the body one of the most di may not- _seem sd wn'y one becomes although to the p meansa, simple p: sound asleep, why in a state of rcpoi cording to the Be a discovery whici mystery of sleep. vstions, wearinea of changes in the by which their so removed, as the u substituted. Inl acquira an uni The result 0 ‘ water is to lease nervous substan stimuli, eonsiit-iu sounds by whichl insufficient to sti ty. When an eat the substitution l stance of the ii asleep. During: similation, the vi solid particles 6 posited. Thus i normal condition this restoration ‘ awakcs. This cl genious, seems t haps as satisfact been propoundc I: is under-st) he: will I: 1876‘ "-rto size, and can-ed with a. p11 page-s have been for codicils, 801‘ been added. '11 died in 1878. m1 were rendered I met of 1834: 3‘ (seath, further] One entry relati 9.‘ the Queen‘s . No matter w} 4:- not, the max 4‘ 4. wags so “TOD v.8. a‘ne property 01 fierve ”I