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i ; 4 The Canadian Statesman, Bowmanvillc, May 3, 1989 Section Two -- Handling It by Lloyd Scott Political Hobnobbing with Harvey According to the late John Holt, well-known educator educator and author (in Freedom Freedom and Beyond and other books), the word discipline has three meanings. A child growing up will meet and learn from each one. The first is the discipline of nature or of reality. If a child doesn't pile the blocks evenly on top of one another, his tower will collapse. If he hits the wrong key on the piano, piano, he'll hear the wrong note. If he doesn't hit the nail squarely on the head, it bends and he has to pull it out, straighten it, or start ' with another. If he closes his eyes when he swings, he won't' hit the ball. If he doesn't measure properly what he's trying to build, it won't tit, stand up, fly, float, open and close, or do whatever whatever he wants it to do. As Holt puts it, this form of discipline is a great teacher. teacher. The learner doesn't have to wait long for the evaluation evaluation of his efforts. From what happened -- the collapsed collapsed tower, the wrong note, the bent nail, the missed ball, the machine that doesn't wofk -- he can see what he did wrong and can learn what correction he needs to make. Finally, the discipline of nature or reality gives the lesson impartially. In each of the above everyday circumstances, circumstances, the grade is given given without fault-finding. There's no blame for missing the ball or piling the blocks crookedly. There's no praise for doing it right either. Doing Doing it right is its own reward. reward. The process of learning through trial and error doesn't, in itself, accumulate penalties or hold grudges for past mistakes. Each trial is a fresh start. A child meets this kind of discipline every time he tries to do something. something. That's why it's important important for children in school to have lots of opportunities to do things, instead of just listening listening (or pretending to listen) listen) to a teacher talk. The second form of discipline discipline is imposed by our culture. culture. It's that network of customs, habits, rules and agreements that bind us together together in a community, in a society. Children generally are eager to understand and be part of this network. They watch carefully what people around them do and want to do the same. They rarely misbehave seriously in church, for instance. They're aware that a mysterious mysterious ritual is going on and, in their way, they want to be part of it. Even at concerts, concerts, little children, though they may fidget a little or take a nap, rarely make any big disturbance. The grownup grownup examle of sitting still is contagious. Surrounded by adults who behave courteously, children will learn to behave courteously. Surrounded by adults who behave discourteously, discourteously, children will behave that way, regardless of how often they're told it's wrong. Such is tne discipline of culture. culture. The third discipline is the one that most people mean when they use the word discipline. discipline. This is the discipline of superior force. "Do what I tell you or I'll make you wish you had." There's bound to be some of this in a child's world, for his own protection. For example, adults can't allow children to learn by trial and error about the dangers of playing in a busy street, or of fooling with the pots and pans on a hot stove, or of eating the pills in a medicine cabinet. So, along with other precau- tions.we say to a child, "Don't play in the street, don't touch things on the stove, don't go into the medicine medicine cabinet or I'll punish you." A child can't possibly have a clear idea of what it would be like to be hit by a car, or burned by a hot' stove, or made sick by medicine. medicine. But he can imagine being being shouted at or punished in some other way._ Therefore, Therefore, he learns to avoid these punishments until he can understand the greater dangers dangers and avoid them for their own sake. John. Holt argues that adults should use the discipline discipline of superior force only when it's necessary to protect protect the life, health and safety safety of children or other living creatures, or to prevent damage to things that peo- • pie care about. Unfortunately, Unfortunately, we adults tend to assume for too long a time that a child can't understand the real nature of the danger from which we want to protect protect him. Faster than we give them credit for, children children learn to avoid the danger, danger, not merely to escape our punishment, but as a matter of good sense. Holt illustrates this point by describing pre-school age children in Mexican cities walking and playing unattended unattended on the. streets. They've learned very young about the dangers of fast- moving traffic and know what to do to be safe. In contrast, contrast, children whose lives tire full of the threat and fear of punishment are locked into babyhood. There's no room for them to grow up, to take responsibility responsibility of their lives. In our particular culture, we mistakenly assume that having to yield to the threat and discipline of adults' su perior force is good for a child's character. It's not. It's never good for anyone's character. Bowing to superior superior force makes people of all ages feel impotent and cowardly cowardly for not having the courage courage to resist. It also makes them resentful and vengeful, vengeful, eager to make someone else pay for their humiliation. humiliation. "Yield to my superior force as I was made to yield to another's." Many adults carry the discipline of superior force to extremes because it gives them power, particularly over children. Here's what it sounds like, stripped of its niceties. "Do whatever you're told to do without questioning or resisting. Do what you're expected to do without having to be told. If you don't, you'll be punished and you'll deserve to be. Take your medicine, your Stop Party Slop 1801 Dundas St. E., Whitby (K-Mart Plaza) The Paper Factory 436-8718 YOUR B.B.Q. 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In our culture, those who say that the discipline of superior superior force isn't put into practice enough with children children are wrong. It's put into practice too much. Angry, rebellious kids of all ages today today aren't so much a sign of too much permissiveness as they are of, among other things, too much adult control control far bevond the age when it's needed for children's protection. protection. If as adults we can't always always avoid using the discipline discipline of superior force, we should use it as seldom as we can. Children learn more effectively from the other forms of discipline. Lloyd Scott is a Marriage and' Family Counsellor in Private practice in Oshawa and in the Orono Medical Centre. He welcomes letters from readers. Write in confidence confidence to Handling It, c/o The Statesman, Box 190, Bow- manville, Ont., L1C 3K9. BLOCK by Harvey Malcolm Kenny Rodgers couldn't have said it Tetter- "You picked a fine time to leave us Lucille." To parody the old tune with the passing of that illustrious red-head wedged as it was halfway between the Provincial Throne speech and the high- drama created by the Federal Federal Budget leak, did not receive receive the recognition she deserved deserved in her sudden passing. She was a comedienne comedienne extra-ordinary and almost everyone over 30 has many fond memories of pleasant hours spent in front of the Boob-Tube watching the "I Love Lucy" show with her complement of side-kicks. She will be remembered remembered as an actress who provided endless pleasure to an admiring and loving public. public. Her memory will live endlessly in the hearts of her fans. Well, enough of nostalgia. From the sublime to the ridiculous, ridiculous, as the saying goes. And we refer unabashed to the comedy of errors that surrounds the debacle referred referred to as the Federal Budget Budget leak. It would appear that the occasion will provide provide the taxpayer with the last unrehearsed cheap entertainment entertainment till we start paying through the nose for all and sundry" in the weeks and months ahead. Not being particularly adept in the field of economics, economics, we shall refrain from commenting on the intricacies intricacies of the budget. As any individual individual knows, or should know, no one, individuals, companies or Governments, can continually spend more money than they take in without going banxrupt. The AMNESTY FOR OVERDUE BOOKS -- If you have a library book that has been gathering dust for about 10 years or so, now's the time to turn it in. Until May 6, the Newcastle Public Library is offering a "Fine Free Fortnight". This is your chance to dig to the bottom of the toybox or the back of the closet and bring in any overdue materials. This is a once-only opportunity opportunity and library fines are going up. So please act now. Books may be returned at any of the three branches. / POPULAR BOOK REPRINTED -- Readers will be pleased to know that "A Place Called Solina" has been re-printed. This book by Marguerite Fraser is in its second printing and will he available available at an Open House on Saturday, May 13, from one p.m. to four p.m. The author will be in attendance to autograph your copy. ONTARIO STREET FUN FAIR -- Everyone is invited to visit Ontario Street Public School's Fun Fair this Friday, May 5. Hours are from six p.m. to nine p.m. Games such as mini golf, fish pond, and a bingo will be under way. And there will be a French cafe for parents parents and other guests. Tickets are available at the door. RABIES CLINIC -- Tomorrow (Thursday, May 4), there will be a Rabies Clinic in the Bowman- ville Public Works Dept, yard, off Liberty St. South. This is an opportunity to have your pet vaccinated for a minimal fee. Remember that animals must be properly restrained at all times and dogs must be properly licenced for the current year. NEW MANAGER AT C.I.B.C. -- The new manager manager at the Canandian Imperial Bank of Commerce Commerce is John Eaton. If that name sounds familiar, it's because he had previously served as branch manager here in Bowmanville between between 1983 and 1986. Welcome back, John. THE CIRCUS IS COMING -- The Newcastle Lions Club will be sponsoring a circus at the Newcastle Arena on Sunday, May 14. Show time is 3:30 p.m., and the acts are provided by the Sparling Brothers Circus. LES MISERABLES -- Next week, you can see Les Misérables (the play) right here in Bowmanville. Bowmanville. The performances take place May 11, 12, and 13th at' St. Stephen's High School. In addition, senior citizens are invited to attend attend a dress rehearsal free of charge on Wednesday, May 10th. All shows take place at eight p.m. To reserve your ticket, phone 623- 7583. PAINTER WINS AWARD -- Congratulations to Visual Arts Centre instructor Les Jones who won the ODCA award for best oil painting at the Oshawa Art Association's 22nd annual juried art exhibition at the Robert McLaughlin Gallery. His painting was entitled "Ragged Rapids". A second painting of Mr. Jones, entitled entitled "Barley Mill, Soper Creek", was also accepted accepted in the juried show. Les teaches an inspiring inspiring and lively painting class atthe mill each afternoon. To participate in his class, call 623- 5831. "• JURIED PHOTO SHOW -- Shutterbugs have about one month to enter their favorite prints in the Visual Arts Centre's annual photography photography contest and show. The entry deadline is June 2nd and both black and white or color photos are welcome. Further information is available by calling the Visual Arts Centre at 623-5831. BUILD A BIRD HOUSE -- On June 4th, the Clarke Township Museum and Archives will . hold a Bird House/Bird Feeder Design Competition. Competition. Youngsters (and adults, too) are invited to construct a bird house and enter it in the contest. There are various age categories, but the contest is open to everyone from pre-schoolers pre-schoolers to adults. There is no fee to enter, but the museum must be notified by all participants May 31. Entries must be at the museum by 12:30 p.m. on June 4th and judging will commence at 1:30. There are 13 prizes divided among the five categories. WINERY TOUR--The Bowmanville Museum will be hosting a trip to the Hillebrand Wineries and Niagara-on-the-Lake Saturday, May 13. The bus departs from the museum at nine a.m. For further details, call 623-2734. RADIATION AND YOUR HEALTH -- On Thursday, May 18, Durham Nuclear Awareness Awareness will sponsor a presentation at the Oshawa Public Library on the topic of "Radiation and Your Health". This meeting commences at 7:30 p.m. Dr. Rosalie Bertell and epidemiologist Dr. Eric Mintz will be the guest speakers along with Marjorie Aamodt, a community community health activist living near the Three Mile Island reactor. SUNDAY PIANO RECITALS -- The Bowmanville Bowmanville Museum has announced a list of pianists who will perform on the Jury-Dominion piano throughout the month of May. They are as follows: follows: Edna Luscombe (May 7); Jean Billett (May 14); Patti Kay (May 21); and Janet Anderson (May 28). Additional pianists are required for the month of June. Anyone wishing to submit his or her name is asked to call the Bowmanville Bowmanville Museum at 623-2734. KINSMEN TRADE SHOW -- Plan to attend the Bowmanville Kinsmen Trade Show which takes place at the new Bowmanville Recreation Recreation Complex starting this Friday, May 5. Hours are from five p.m. to 10 p.m. Friday and then from noon to eight p.m. Saturday and from noon to four p.m. Sunday. Drop by the Recreation Recreation Centre and have a look at the latest products products available from your area businesses. There's special emphasis on consumer-related products for the home. BLOOD DONOR CLINIC -- The Annual Red Cross Blood Donor Clinic is happening today (Wednesday, May 3,) at the Lions Centre, on Beech Ave., in Bowmanville. The clinic runs from noon until eight p.m. Free transportation to the clinic will be provided today by calling 623-9010. The previous clinic set a new record for the number of blood donations. Let's see if we can match or exceed that tally. SPECIAL OLYMPICS -- The Newcastle Fitness Fitness Centre in Bowmanville, will host the Region Region 12 Ontario Special Olympics this'Sunday, May 7. Anyone interested in viewing events at the meet can visit the centre any time after 11 a.m. Athletes are competing in these games in order to qualify for the Provincial Special Olympics which will be held in Toronto. The events of the Special Olympics take place from 9:30 a.m. to four p.m. Consequently, some of the afternoon public swimming programs will be cancelled. WEAVERS' GUILD -- Are you interested in the ancient art of weaving? If so, this is your chance to look at the process of weaving close-up. The Weavers' Guild will be setting up their looms in the Bowmanville Branch of the Newcastle Public Library on Wednesday, May 10, from two p.m. to four p.m. and from seven p.m. to nine p.m. Members of the Guild will display their work and be available to answer questions. LIONS DESERVE CREDIT--In the recent publicity publicity surrounding the Rolling Thunder theatre performance at Bowmanville High School, we neglected to mention that the Bowmanville Lions Club was one of the sponsors of the project. project. Thanks to the Lions' donation and a donation donation from the Rotary Club, Bowmanville High School was able to bring this important play about disabilities to the students at BHS. MP IS AVAILABLE -- Ross Stevenson, MP for Durham, has announced that he and his staff will be available twice each month at locations in the Town of Newcastle to talk with constituents constituents who require advice or assistance on federal government matters. On the first Friday Friday of each month, you can meet your MP at the Newcastle Village Community Hall, from two p.m. to four p.m. On the third Friday of each month, the meeting place is in Court Room Two, above the Fire Hall, in Bowmanville. Bowmanville. Hours for the Bowmanville meeting are also from two p.m. to four p.m. These meetings will commence this month. SENIORS MEET -- The Bowmanville Senior Citizens' Club will be meeting at the Lions' Centre next Tuesday, May 9th, at 7:30 p.m. for an evening of cards. If you need bus pick-up. please call Keitha Alldread at 623-5800, BRINK'S EXCAVATING R.R. #2 Newcastle, L0A1H0 * Trenching * Gravel & Top Soil * Grading & Levelling * Septic Installations > * Back Filling * General Excavating * Dump Truck Service (416) 987-4995 Affordable Dream Vacations! PERSONAL ANDCORPORATE TRAVELSERVICES 68 King St, E. (Veltrl Complex) BowmanvHle 623-6600 • Free Vacalion Planning Services • Discount Cruises • Airline Tickets • Charter Vacations e Honeymoon Packages • Hotel and Car Reservations Ejl Travel Agents International Ihyfl Wre u 'ith ) vu all the a ay. MS Over 300 Agencies In North America Reg., 2758550 Conservative government's attempt to rectify the situation, situation, however belatedly, is to be commended. Some of the avenues they are pursuing to do so are somewhat debatable. debatable. In the events televised televised from the House of Commons, the participants put on a pretty good show in our opinion. Admittedly, we have never never been a great admirer of John Turner's style: but on Thursday mid-day a new John Turner emerged from his sputtering,hacking cocoon cocoon and really laid it on the line whether you agree with him or not. Never have we seen him so dynamic, so feisty feisty so self confident in his "righteous indignation". As reporters suggested, he was certainly out for the jugular of Finance Minister Wilson but in the final analysis lit tle blood was lost and Mr. Wilson will scarcely require a hasty transfusion. Retiring N.D.P. leader Ed Broadbent appeared to have lost a little of his customary fire and brimstone and was not quite as fluent in his criticism as has been his custom. His side kick Riis, appeared to be quite knowledgeable knowledgeable and conversant with the unusual forces that were in progress. The P.C. House Leader Doug Lewis in his rather unorthodox unorthodox style and unusual mannerisms, did little to convince anyone that all was well in Tory Land. 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