Ontario Community Newspapers

Fenelon Falls Gazette, 9 Aug 1895, p. 2

The following text may have been generated by Optical Character Recognition, with varying degrees of accuracy. Reader beware!

mu... ‘v'ir‘k‘ - .. HEART. T0 ,2 ‘ l 012., LOVE’S UNERRING CHOICES CHAPTER XI. DETECTIVE SNAKE. The finder or rather the thief who stole the will, was seated in the back parlor of a coffeewas with Roger but the work of a moment, and when the butler entered be' hastily exclaimed : ” Tell Markham I shall not shoot today, l and order “'ilkins to put Black Bess into the cart, I must go to London this morning I low “public” in Camden Town. “’th 5 and want to catch the 9.3-3 express." congenial “pal,” busily reading the docunientin question and planning the' best way to make something out of his And before the astonished William could reply his master rushed from the room and upstairs two steps at a time to change his shooting dress for a costume more suited treasure trove. He did not clearly see his to the London urea“, way for some time, when a happy thought cameto his aid, and jumping up, he excited- ly exclaimed: “Give my love to my aunt, Williams, such a document ! It is and say I shall return to dinner,” he said as he sprang into the cart and gave the mare her head, who started off as if she “By jingol I have it. I’ll go to my uncle, too, like her master. had gone suddenly Detective Smart, and see what he'll say to mndo it. If anything’s to be got out of it he’s the man to do it." On the following morning he was clos- eted with that gentleman, who quickly decided upon a course of action. H9 l rightly judged that the person most in- terested was the young lady named as heiress, and the midday rail to Marham carried the neat. person of the detective to that locality. At the inn he learned the l particulars of the disappearance cf the ci- devant Miss Peloraine, and the long low whistle which escaped from his lips reveal- ed a history of suspicion that foul play had been at work, as the attorney who drew the will must. have known a gross injus-. tice was being perpetrated, as he could i have borne testimony that Miss Deloraine was the rightful successor of her father's property. As he had not done so, he must be inter, ested in the fraud; therefore he was the last person to inter'uiew. But then, would he not give a heavy sum to re-posseas the will? But would not Miss Deloraine outbid him ? He resolved, as he said, to act “on the square," because, perhaps, he thought, by so doing he would be likely to equally 1 well fill his pocket and satisfy his conscience i for a detective has a conscience which ca beâ€"pscified. ‘. He boldly advertised in the “agony' . column of the Standard and other papers l for the address of Miss Hilda Deloraine,but Was unsuccessful in getting any reply. He 2 then put the wits of his professional breth‘ , ran to work, and succeeded in tracing the ' young lady to her then domicile. . It. was a cheerless afternoon in February, but Mrs. Grey’s cheerful little sitting-room x A couple of hours later Roger found him. self in Mr. Smart’s parlor. It would be tedious to recapitulate all the story which Mr. Smart told Roger of the unhappy Hilda’s sufferings and priva- tions, and the hot blood of the young man boiled in his veins as he listened to the tale of his darling's misfortunes. As Roger afterward expressed it, he “ cottoned ” to I - .9 .“This is an unexpected pleasure, Mr. Montacute." said Nigel, rising and holding _ out his hand. The young man, however, was putting his hat andgloves upon a side 3 table, and took no notice of the other’si offered hand. A sarcastic smile curved the lawyer's lips as he drew a chair to the fire and asked his visitor to sit down. Roger took the seat, ; and then looking keenly at \Ventworth'st worn face, asked : ” Have you ever discovered any traces of Mr. Deloraine’s Will?" The law 'er gazed at his questioner in unbounde surprise. “ Mr. Deloraine’s will i” he exclaimed. y “ What makes you ask so strange a ques- 2 tion 2 Surely you know that no pains were wanting on our part to find any traces of quite clear to my mind that the sudden death of the ppor squire prevented his making any provision - forâ€"his daughter. Nigel brought out the last word with difficulty, and Roger leaped from his chair as he spoke, confronting him with his bright, hazel eyes flashing with rage. “ Liar and traitor l" he exclaimed in-, dignantly. “ You may spare youself'. any further vain assertions. The will executed by Mr. Delorsine, with your name or. it as proof that it was drawn up . in your office, has been discovered, and is in the possession of Detective Smart, who DRINKS Tl] MAKE AT HOME can Banana WITH ics. SUGAR, WATER. AND a FLAVOR. ' livery Glrl Should Learn This Lesson- Iiotv to flake Plain Lemonade- "Horse's Neck" and “S1Dberl'y \‘lne‘ garâ€"Important Hints for All [impis- nble Housewives. In many a household during these hot summer evenings the guest of an hour sits in a dimly lit parlor or on a rug-covered stoop, mayhap a balcony, and even though the girl beside him is his very best feels a queer dryness of the throat and a yearning for a liquid that is cool. If, a few seconds before the sleek strikes lO,there is a gentle tinkle through the hallway, the sound that t he ice makes when it swishes through water and ,knocks against glass or china then his evening is a complete duccess. Every modern girl, therefore, should learn this lesson,and keep pinned up in her knowledge box a list of liquid preparations that can be speedily and efi'ectively made the kindly detective at once, and poured . will see that justice is done to the child of to regale the palate of the visitor. Nor into his sympathizing ears all the history of the interrupt-ed marriage and the un- availiug search for the squire’s will. CHAPTER XII. IN 'rus ohoaairuo. On the evening of the day which witness- ed the interview between Mr. Smart and Roger Moutacute Hilda was sitting at a small table, drawn close to the pleasant, flower-decked window, taking advantage of the fading February daylight to finish a sketch she was coloring of the Easter meet of the Queen's staghounds upon the wide thicket near her old home. She was utterly alone in the great empty mansion, Mrs. Grey having gone to spend the after- noon wiih her daughter and to make the acquaintance of a new grandson, and by and by she began to find the silence oppres sive and to w.sh for something to break the stillnesr. Her wish was soon gratified, a loud double knock at the great hall door, which was so seldom opened, causing her to start from her seat and hurry up the short flight of stone steps which led to the empty deserted hall. “Who could it be !” she wondered, as her little fingers sought to undo the heavy bolts and bars of the ponderous doors. She looked out nervously as, the fastenings at length undone, she opened the great door. ' A cry of surprise broke from her lips. Ah 1 not even the gathering gloom of the February night could blind her to the fact that it was Roger Montacute who stood before her. “My darling ! My little love 1” exclaim- was ruddy and bright with the glowiof use ed the young fellow, gathering her fragile fire which flickei‘pd and sparktiep it; E‘ 6 . form to hisdbrlpad breast antllpreslsintg Iond(i bri hi1 olishet grate. Sea er it .ie jlnlptLSSlolle isses upon t e c ice 5 an tabIe, viiitliJaparchment deed iudhils hang, [lips whose lovely bloom 1,3,1 fled. “How was a gentleman. He was mi d e-uue . lcruel you have been to me ! Where have and his cldsely cropped hair and Carefully gyou hidden yourself for the last year? But {immed- w"“~k°” I:i““§i§§l‘ii.Ӥ.§'§.li‘ "lrl'i‘f.‘°‘3’.’$lry§.l “Jill: $311333 3.1.535“? L l g e e s ‘. n . crecSIISu‘l': 0keein brigfff), dark eyec'lmdI lSmart bile told me all. It'spa miracgleâ€"a ruddy bouiplexiofi. A creamy rOBGbUd in Idirect interposition of Providence. the buttonhole of his faultlessly htting blue : Silentlyâ€"for her heart was too full for morning coat and his whole attire b‘espoke {speechâ€"Hilda led the. way downstairs one whose ,lines had falls? in 3.8388115 to Mrs. Grey’s cheerful little sitting- phages, By apd by he roseiui'tp‘n'ibnoilsi 8:31;: liboom, and, liltvlillgh stillier the figs intp‘ a an attic is memoram . iaze permit Cl er over to raw or the dbcketgof M5 00“. he “lied M‘s- Grey idown’ beside him on the sofa, where, her to call Miss O'Connor, as he had someth rig ‘Ignlden head pillowed upon Roger’s breast, of importance to communicate bio Lilli“ gslie sat in bliss too deep for words,while lie lady ;' in fact, he had come there at. l ay , unlflolded all the plausnior the future.‘ especmlly to see her. In a few miiiuteal .And, my darling, he. added tenderly, Hilda made her appearance more than leaking the girl’s round chin in his hand and astonished {hattany one Wisthedbpomsgg bar; ‘ lifting up her filtce to his, thlile hipi glucose She thong it e to was qui e 0 . of passionate ove were re ecte in t e from the world’s remembrance, and Wished sweet eyes of the woman he adored, “if to remain so. I I we had failed in establishing your right to The detective cautiously and slowly Einherit your father’s estate we would have unwound thp Ithrciild pif nh::fl:;o?;.ccqllil;<l=lll ibeqp married quiitly ill] Londpn and iought to Hilda uni icil-i inl “mm” “R0 _ a ' oime lll upot. er hiemisp ere. haVe ment. Hilda con ( on y n _ g ‘-sa'\ 81 money l uring t e past year, and the er," and seemed ready to faint from sur‘ isnlebf my horses would have been enough prise and excitement. Mrs. Grip-y soon g to give us a start iu‘pnother country, but,” enlightenedd the doteque aisdrtpa t :80 STE-e i he adoeddgrfivpdly, th you musl'ilpledgle me Roger an givmg is a s . . - 3your wor , i a, at. you in not save Smart: advised that ofiicial to see him With- I. this shelter, which, if a humble, is still a out 103,, of time, isafe one, until I return to claim your a a a a O i ' hand.” The long months of separation, with all ‘tlie privations and sorrows of that bitter 3 time, had broken down Hildn’s pride, and _ ’ . :now Roger’s tender words found an echo 0‘. gm” w“ ewewd' and mumng "if"? to in her breast, and she realized besides how diamonds, while it shone cheerfully llllO , ' i . v . 1 cruel a thing hdll been her desertlon of the the Pleumlt breakwat'loom.“ [he 'Eemple' man who loved her even though she had gleamll‘g on we spilrklmg am far [im- Pm?” ‘ done it from a mistaken sense of duty; and 1,,“ china. of the breakfast tabie “llth was . . h I ,1 f R at \Ion‘ucme.s mum”, men, looking up in her lovers grave, earnest "‘ 0" 03 ‘ ‘ ' ' face, her violet eyes swimming in tears,slie . ' he 'oun man in . . . h.‘ I"? ye}: rulilya: h:l:lmlred",he groom ‘uud : laid her liille hand in his broad palm and ms 8 1c”l"l'5°‘r° ' 'proniised all he wished. I I rang the bell for his cohee.‘ 1 . i _ v ‘ ” Your letters, sir," said the butler, as; A {oud' lulgumb “"833: hell-1‘5 to heart a ~ and lip pressed to lip and the lovers he brought in the coffee and took the r p . _ . V . . ‘ covers off the hot dishes, canning uii palted' Rmel w'th lmpe l-e‘ImE 1“ ms appetizing odor to fill the apartment, plac- . '1‘???” [,0 “life hi"; “all tori”! “OI-Pl. Willie in as he spoke apile of letters by Roger's 1.01“ “am y a ) ° "° re“ ‘28 “1"103’ thh 15"", ' has come when returned to her wouted e . . . . . ' ‘ tion and busim‘l herselfin re arin “ - ’ " oncitlie -ouii ‘0“ ' , _ P P g Thinks' “ mum" re) 1 l - g 1 tea for her kind old friend, whose rerun: man, and then he asked, as he ureteeoui to open his letters : “ Is Markham in the 38m “pane” every mum'm“ kitchen? if so, give him some breakfast: and tell him I shall be ready in half aii' hour." “Very well, sir,” replied the man, as he: ~ ' ‘ left the room, leaving Montacuze to peruse l The bright opting afternoon was waning, his letters and finish his breakfast ere heland the clerks in the offices of Nigel started on his day's shooting. ; \Ventm rth. in (lruy’s Inn, where cullgrat. "New, I wonder who that's ivom 2" said ufating themselves that their day’s work Roger, as he took up a letter in u bluz'was nearly over, . when “a gentleman, invelope, addressed in legal handwriting. lispringing i'p the Wl-‘le, echotng stair case. “It can't be a lliil ; let's see what it’sgentcred the outer office and asked one of menu.» lt‘ne busy clerks if Mr. Wentworth was The letter was as follows : j disengaged. " . A. ~ . ’ u - . - , _ u c “'22 \\ est street, tension road, I “he”? 50v "Iv W“ ~h5 reply. “ hat ; ~ 2 , .sl “Landon. pcbrmry 19. lg_. ,name shall Isa) . “Sir ~ I trus' you Will excn-e a in rift-ail "51"" MI. “lelll'wonl‘ ml“ “rd. 3nd ., . . ‘ . _ , . 9 v _ r p , _ “ stranger like myself addressing you on II in} 1 “ml‘ “"‘l d‘f‘“? IN“ [01391 pr:vate matter of business, but l have been 3 “ “ mum“ 0" “‘0 “‘9 her tell-"Md “we” m udderflflfl um you Me a hmmiu, ; and haskeo‘hir: Montat-uie to iollow him Miss Hilda O'Connor. otherwise l‘eioraxue. l mm H ms [M 5v prumvce' “m i,- N' x 3m” be 2nd ,{ you con“, favor; linger found .\igel \\ entworth seated at > ' his table billsin engaged in writing letters. ihizich as Roger had. reason to dislike the A clear, bright morning ‘in February. The beanie of the sun, gliuting upon the boar frost With which every leaf and blade CBAl’l‘FR XIII. BROI'HHT To HAY. me with a call at the above address, to con- i alder whether any steps could be taken in, proiide the young lady With the lnr'llls of 3 support she is at present entirey destitute of. I remain, a r, your obedient serv. 1 ant, I "EnursnSiuR‘rfi' “To Roger Moniacutc, l-qu. " ' lawyer, he could not but. be struck with the marked change in his appearance which had taken place during the past year. His dark hair was thic'sly streaked with silver, in: eyes Were sunk and burnt with a fever- ish lustre, while the tieeplines graven upon this brow and around his mouth rol-i their the generous friend whose trust you so I cruelly betrayed. I wonder M ark Delor- aine’s spirit could rest in its grave while you were causing his unhappy daughter to ' suffer privations and be exposed to dangers - almost unheard of to satisfy your revenge." “ Take care what you say, Mr. Monta- cute," replied the lawyer. “ You have no proof of what you choose to assert; the fact that Mr. Deloraine'a will was executed in my office does not prove that I was privy to its concealment." "Why, just now you denied that Mr. Deloraine made any provision for his daughter, although you are the solicitor who drew the will leaving her everything. ‘What a boundless scoundrel you must be. \Vliat is your object ‘2" “ I’m not supposed to recollect the contents of every document drawn in my office," replied \Ventworth, his face ashy pale and his whole body trembling as if alfected with palsy. But even while he spoke Nigel, knew that the game was up, and bitter despair and rage filled his heart as he thought of the consequences of his rash action and knew that he had sinned in vain. Roger laughed a bitter, scornful laugh as he re- plied : “ Those paltry excuses will avail you nothing; you may be quite sure that no mercy will be shown to you, and you must be well aware exactly what punishment the law will mete out to you. What have you gained by your cruel treachery? You have wrought your own ruin, and the in- jury you have done to‘ your dead friend's child has recoiled upon your own head.” And without another Word Roger Monta- cute turned and left the room, closing the heavy door behind him with a clung, leav- ing Vientworth to his own bitter reflec- tions. How long he sat there he knew not. The office hours were over and one by one the clerks cluttered down the stone steps and departed to their several homes,‘ and still the wretched man sat in liis desolate oifice,musing over the ruinof his prospects, a bitter pang rending his soul as he thought of the disgrace and shame which would rest upon the name he had always striven to keep untarnished. But worst of all was the thought that his sin was unavailing, and a bitter, despairing sigh broke from his heart as he thought of Hilda’s soft dainty beauty once more folded in her lover's arms. Morning broke clear and cold, and the chill breezes came in through the open: window, fluttering the papers on the table, but Nigel never stirred.but leaned forward on his desk, his head resting on his arm. In. this position the housekeeper found him will the young matron or the mother of a large and growing family find this caution and such a list malapropos. A hot evening needs the sound of clinking ice. What a woman can do with a pitcher of ice-water, or rather with a bowl of cracked 'ice, is legion. 'Until the trial is made it would seem that the combinations are few. I There is lemonade, the amateur says, and lemonade. In reality there are at least twenty different preparations which de- mand little time. little trouble and little expense in their concoction. There is no prettier hospitality than to always have cool glassfuls of some daintin flavored liquid. to be replenished from a great pitcher near by, and a plateful of some dainty sweet cake. The housewife should 100k for enough ahead to see that the icebox is well filled. Fresh and juicy oranges and lemons should be somewhere within the cupboards. Nor will a bottle of fruit syrup, of any flavor preferred, be found out. of the way. Bottles of soda and ginger ale should always be among the necessary supplies, and at least two or ’ three of such should be upon the ice long before nightfall. And there should be the cake in the box. l Lemonade, perhaps, is the most felicitous thing to begin on. Lemonade is generally either too sweet or too weak. A two-quart pitcher full will satisfy six to eight very thirsty persons. For this quantity five lemons, three-quarters of a pound of sugar, and a quart of water are needed. The sugar should be granulated. Squeeze the lemons into a bowl by means of a squeezer ; add the sugar, and stir the mixture. Then add the water. The mix- ture should then be strained over the ,cracked ice‘ in the pitcher. To cool properly, the pitcher should have been about a third filled with this cracked ice, and the wise will let thecompleted beverage stand a good fifteen minutes. 1 “Horse’s neck" is not an attractive ; name and from a point of art the beverage i not pretty, but it is extraordinarily palat- iahle. Use tall, thin glasses instead of a ; pitcher. “Horse’s neck” consists of lemon I I peel and ginger ale, theory being that the lemon peel. A lemon is carefully' peeled so that it. comes off in one continuous spiral, i and the peel is then wound up and down the Inner sides of the empty glass, from top to bottom. The glass is then filled . l ‘ ke e tli ' ' when, at 8 o’clock, she came in to arrange u wn’h cmc d w ’ e gmger 8‘10 poured m the offices for the day. She was an old and j and allowed to stand for several minutes. . Straws should invariably be used in serving trusted servant, and ventured to touch her V this drink. master and try to rouse him from what she | though“ was an uneasy Slezp' Ay 1 can as but keep the bottles on the ice several loudly as you like, chafe the ice-‘cold hands, try to force brandy between the pallid lips, but it is all to no purpoae, and, frightened at last, the good woman hurriedly departed to seek a doctor. “He has been dead for hours,” said the l medical man, as, his brief examinationl over, he turned to those about him, "and, see,” forcing, as he spoke, a little bottle, from which proceeded a strong, subtle odor of peaches, from the stiffened hand, “here is the cause of his death; he has poisoned himself with pruasic acid.” An inquest was held over Nigel Went- worth’s body, and, in mercy to his dead foe, Roger Montacute forbore to speak of that last interview between himself and the lawyer,and as his grieving housekeeper and bewildered clerks gave evidence as to their master’s strange ways and abstracted manner, the merciful verdict was recorded, “That Nigel Wentworth had destroyed imself in afit of temporary insanity.” And so respected and honored by his many friends and acquaintances he was laid to rest, and the secret of his wrongdoing was buried with him. (To as common.) _._â€".â€"._â€"â€" How to Fire a Pistol. It is a peculiar fact that very few men, even accomplished shots, know how a re- volver ought to be handled. Nearly all are taught to handle a revolver as if it were a rifleâ€"that is, by bringing the object. aimed at and the fore and hind sight into a line. This is all well enough for shooting gallery practice, but should never be followed in the field. When training troops to use the revolver they are taught, in aiming, never to look at the weapon at all, but to kee their eyes on the object to be struck. n quick firing, and especially in shooting from horse- back, much better results are obtainable in this way. ._...__.-.______1. Couldn’t Declde on a Choice. She is determined to be a musician, but can't deci ie whether to make aspecialty of the violin or the piano. . Has she no positive predilection for either! Oh, yes : but some of her friends think Ginger ale alone is exceedingly palatable, hours. The glasses should be half filled with cracked ice. ; Orangeade is made with three lemons i and two oranges (this being the rule for a two-quart pitcher full), every particle of the oranges being used, rind and all. In ' fact, the rind is u very important factor in orangeade’s success. Sugar to suit the taste and drop in a few whole cloves. Raspberry vinegar is decidedly an old- timer as a drink and one that has very much to recommend it. It is an old farm- house delicacy, and for years in rural dis- tricts has been the great "company drink,” » being brought out at an afternoon call, a tea drinking, a wedding or a funeral. Sev- teral days are needed to get it to its full l ineed of glory. Red raspberries only must 1 be used. Take two quarts of these, and iadding to them one quart of good vinegar let the mixturestand for twenty-four hours. Then strain through a flannelbag and pour . the juice over two more quarts of berries. lAgeiu let the mixture stand twenty-four l hours, then strain once more and stir in cut sugar, three-quarters of a pound to every pint of juice. After carefully stirring place in a stone jar that is covered. The jar should be set immediately in a kettle of water and let boil until the sugar is dis- solved. Then bottle for u e, before it gets j cool, cork and seal and set in a cool place, ; preferably a collar. This beverage should , be mixed With water according to the tastes f of the people who are to drink it and pour- i ed over ice. r Blackberry jelly dissolved in water is in I many ways by far the best of hot evening ,drinks. For each glassful served a good, lgenercus tableapoonful of jelly should be .used, and it Will be greatly improved if _E justa dash of lemon juice is added. Cocoa. 5 nut cake makes a very good side dish for ' it. Tamarinds dissolved in water are a decidedly palatable variation of this, and i wafers should be eaten with them, The l fruit. should be put into the water whole and thoroughly stirred. Let the beverage ' stand five minutes. The French have a drink the: is very similar to the last two, and goes by the name of "casein." It is drunk without any other flavoring and is usually mixed 9 with water. 5 Lime iuice should not beforgotten, Ac. ’ cording'to the taste of many people, it is a i drink fit for the gods, especially when it is ' accompanied by sponge cake. Some people prefer to take limes themselves and squeeze To thrust the letterjnto his pocket, wo- lown tale of a heart ill at 935: With the she looks better standing,‘and others thaz‘t'mem as if they were lemons. A‘very ently poll the bell amt hastily awdlnw his l world .lml itself. sitting is more becoming so her. excellent lime iuice, however. may be i ginger ale draws out the bitterness in the‘ bought in the she in bottles. It poured over cracks ice and dllnhd 90 tests. - Many concoctions of roots, such as dan- delion and ssesafras, are known to old housekeepers. but the knowledge of these must be taught personally, and can hardly be adequately told in print. Iced tra is too well known to be described, though many are the crimes of cookery that are committed in its name. â€"â€"â€"â€"-.â€"â€"â€"â€"- SUMMER SMILES. The Wifeâ€"” It must he bedtime." Hue bandâ€""Hardly ; the baby hasn't waked up yet." “ Iii, Jimmy, wot's the matter 2" “Bach's blistered." “Swimmin' or llckin’i’ “Both.” “They say Hamsey is generous to a fault." “ Yes, he is, if it happens who one of his owufaults." If a bicycle’s known as a “ bike," A tricycle must be a ” trike,” And when winter comes round It will doubtless be found That an icycle goes as an “ ike." Belleâ€"“ Mr. Jolyer is such a nice man. He said that I had a voice like a bird." Nellâ€"“ Yes; he told me you sang like an owl. " “Isn’t be rather fast?" asked the anxious mother. “ Yes, mamma, in one sense of the word. 1 don't think he can get away.” This world would land in glory yet And make a lively stir, If in these days we could forget The mad thermometer l “ That man causes me no end of annoy- ance over a bill.” “\Vhy don’t you sue him and collect it?" “Collect it! He’s trying to do that." " Papa !” “ What is it, Johnny 2" “I read a poem in my school reader which spoke of ’dogs of high degree.’ " ” “’ell?” “ Papa, does that mean akye terriers 2 ' Nibbsâ€"“ What a perfect poem the count’s rich wife is l" Dibbsâ€"“ Yes ; the count is the only man I know of who can make poetry pay him thirty thousand a year.” Sheâ€"” Oh, my ! there’s something gone down my back i" Heâ€"” It’s one of those thundering bugs, I suppose.” “ No; I guess it’s one of those lightning bugs, George.” Sheâ€"“ Do you know, Harry, father has forbidden you the house ! He â€"“ Forbid- dsn me the house i” I never asked him for his house. His daughter is good enough or me." “ Have you the ‘Relics of By-(lone Days 3’ " asked the young lady, entering a bookstore. " Yes," replied the polite clerk with a bow, “ we may have some of last year’s calendars." Lea (sadly)-â€"“ I don't know what to do with that son of mine. He’s been two years at the medical college, andst-ill keeps at the foot of his class. ” Perrins .(nrompt- ly)â€"“ Make a chiropodist of him." Police justiceâ€"“What's the charge against this man 2" Policemanâ€"“Imper- sonating an officer.” “What did he do 1" “ He walked up to a street vendor's stand and took a handful of peanuts.” Won’t someinventor, cage or mentor, Find that chief of boons, The wear-resisting, long-persisting, Non-bagging pautaloons ? Charlesâ€"“What makes you look so glum, Harry?" Harryâ€"“Maud Sweetser has thrown me over.” Charlesâ€"“Oh, I wouldn't mind that; a woman never hits where she means to when she throws." Pattentâ€"“ How can I reduce my weight '2” Doctorâ€"“You should have something to do. Something to keep your mind busy, to worry you even.” Patient -“By the way, you might send your last month’s bill in." The perfume of her violets I never shall forget, For the floriat’s bill that came with them Is hovering ’round me yet. Mrs. Foggâ€"“Then there was a man who recited a poem or something. I couldn’t for the life of me make out what, but he was tremendously applauded.” Mr. Foggâ€" “Evidently one of our most talented elocutioniste." “Yes,” said the girl who was chewing gum, “it is simply awful the way the poor people do suffer this frightful weather. How I pity them l And the worst of it is, of course, that one’s hair simply won’t stay in curl.” Oh, sweetly tender was her look, Her hair was bright as gold ; I bought three copies of her book, And then her glance grew cold. Young Tutterâ€"“Miss Clara, suppose that to-morrow evening I should call again. and having nerved myself up to it,suddenly while we were conVersing,I should without a word throw my arms around your neck and deliberately kiss youâ€"what Would you do 2" Miss Pinkerly-“Oh, Mr. Tutter, don’t ask me to look so far ahead." â€".â€"+â€"â€"â€"â€"â€"â€" Paying a Hotel Bill in Japan. Canon Tristram, in the Leisure Hour, gives an amusing account of settling his hotel bill in Japan. "The final reckoning with our host," says the Canon, “was to me a most amusing illustration of the national courteaiea. Mr. Kanaya acted as though the production of his bill were the most painful effort, and at length reluct- antly brought it forth, consisting of a number of Chinese scrawls on strips of tissue paper. 0n bended knees and for- head touching the mat, did my friend push it forward, I, bowing as woll as my stiff Western back would permit me, placed the proper sum, wrapped in thin white paper, before him, for nothing is more illbred than to hand coin without its being wrapped in paper. Again it was received with bowing, low, lower, lowest ; but it is always the rule of politeness to pay sonic- thing more than the billâ€"in fact, to pay a hotel bill net would be considered an insult, or, at least, a mark of great dissatisfaction. Therefore, wrapping a yen (dollar) in White paper, I added it with low bowa. It. was lreturned with lower, and finally pressed upon the host with still more profound inclinations, and was at length duly and gratefully received. The I bright little waiting maid re:cived her yen with the some show of modest retuctsme.” .. -â€"-â€".-. «~.- tunaâ€"lei ." P-IMM‘. n.............â€"_ m.“ ,~___, ~. -...... .y---_. , M..- t-.. l ...______,__ __ .

Powered by / Alimenté par VITA Toolkit
Privacy Policy