l'Il go in public in underwear if I don't take off 35 pounds Ail my New Year's resolutions are preîty mucli hy the buard flow. In fact, 1 acluaiiy put on weighî inslead of iosing it, which 1 dun't undcrsîand ai ail. I've weighed myseif* cach mumîing since January 1 and i've put on 4.5 pounds. At that rate, i wili put on about 300 pounds by the end of the year. My scale is actually starting tu cumplain 1) mie. The screen flashes 'lu" if i weigh myseif tuo many times in a row, which i tend lu do bec-ause i can't bel teve what I'm seeing. It miglit just lie the battery, but il could aiso lie a short formi for "Iower your weight, big fella, and get off of me." People have a liard time believing hqw much 1 weigh, or ai least they say su. "Oh, yuu don't look like you weigh ihat mucli." i don't know if people are jus( being pole, thougli, or if they reaiiy mean il. Su, whaf if means is iliat 1 cas aciuaily feel goudi about myseif because f'm faîfer ihan i louk, if thai makes any sense. 1 aiways say that muscle is heavier Ilian fat. As if I aciuaily believe Ihat's flic case with me. It used lu lie. At une lime, 1 coud sit un thie buttior uta pool withouî using rny ams 1(1 keep me irurs floaling lu tlie top. If* you think that's easy, give il a try. For the recurd, 1 weîgli 264.5 pounds. fi you'd like lu, tell me 1 dont louk as f I weigh that mucli. please feel free lu du su. If you du think I look as if1 weigh that much, keep ilt b yourself. My younger brother doesn't both- er with any pleasantries or polite- ness. When he sees me lie says, "How are you doing, fat boy?" It doesn't bother me because 1 have no sympathy for myseif or ottier tubbies. unless there's nothing they can do about it. It was worse when 1 was a kid. My mother used to tell me thlat if 1 didn't stop eating she was going to shop in the Husky Boy section for my clothes. That would have been a horror worse than death. 1 don't know that there really was a Husky Boy section, but 1 guarantee you 1 lived in fear ut it must of my child- hood. Some people remember different traumatic events in their life, sucli as their 30th and 401h birthdays, but for me il's been my pants size. iwas 32 in higli schooi when i weighed 180 pounds and was active and ath- ietic. In my eariy iwenties, 1 went up tu size 34 and then lu 36 in my cariy thirties. Il was a terrible day in my mid-thirties wlien i had lu take size 38s int the change room. Around about 40, i graduaîed lu suze 40, whicli made il a double whammy. But. then I lusi weight iast year. Thinty-five pounds. And 1 went back down lu a suze 38, whicli feit fanlastie. 1 didn't use any kind of diet, but 1 did esercise more. Mostiy, ljust ate less. If was as sim- ple as that. And i found that the iess I aie, the iess I wanted. It worked weii and i felt mueli letter. And then throughouf this year I put back on every ounce and then some, without even knowing it. We need incentives when trying to lose weight. For example. iryou were to give me a million dollars if 1 losi 50 pounda by the end of the year then I guarantee you, I would lose il, and su would almost any- body. If any buliionaire wants to offer me iliat, i'd lie giad to accept if, but faiiing that I'm going teu have tu provide my own incentive. Su here tl is. If I don't lose 35 pounds and am not under 230 by the end uf the year, i wiii waik down Main Street ilirougli down- town Milton in my underwear on New Year's Day. That's sca ry enougli incentive for everybudy lu see me succeed, su please, "Dontl feed the fat boy.' The Canadian Champion, Friday, January 12. 2001 - 13 Got a hot scoop? We love to hear story ideas. Cali 878-234 1, ext. 234. Don 't Put It Sx 14 POUNDS LIGHTER by Valentn's Day GUARANTEEDI ~acIo-MucLEWEIGIT TO>NNG TREATMENTS MANAGEMENT (Reduce 12 ta 30 Inch** wReglstered Nulwtloria In 5 weeks Consultant on Staff ."Bulci Muscle Tons and fLose Weight Eaing Peal redluce the appearance Foodi 2-4 Iba per week of cellulite (Boov.t Metobolism. Feel fCondense 9 hours of Heolthy and Energlzed exercise Into 40 mi-nutes fFocusing on a Lifestyle .Firm Up those hard to Change tons areas ./Maintenance Programs 550 Ontario St. S. Unit 18 875-2889 * Getting to Iknow the Community Care Access Centre CCAC (OCAC) of Halton H ALTO N *The Community Cars Access Centre of Halton will help to find a home for your loved one when living independently is no longer a safe option. One alternative is placement in a Long-Term Cars facility (nursing home). As you may already be aware, Hahton currently has a limited number of Long-Term Care facilities. However, over the next few years, a number of new facilities are scheduled to open in Halton. *Prior to the opening of a new facility, ads will appear in the local newspaper regaiding the facility anid application process. This wiIl allow those people not cun'ently on our Long- Term Care wait Iist f0 apply for placement in the new facility. If you require any assistance with this process, please contact the CCAC of Halton. At the same time, those people currently on our waiting list for abdin a Long-Term Care facility wvill receive a letter, indicating mhat they should let us knwif they wish to have their name added to the wait list of the new facility. eThe Cornrunity Care Access Centre of Halton is easy to contact. If you, a family member or fniend needs hom0'care services, personal support, or placement into a Long-Terni Cars facility, you can reach us, 7 days a week, 8:30 arn. to 10:00 p.m. by calling (905) 639-5228 or, toîl free at 1 -800-810-0000. There is no cost tomte client for direct services provided by the CCAC. Services are funded through mhe Ministry of Health and Long-Terrn Cars. 'Upcoming Board 1 Meet*àng Dî-aes 1 1 a Januiary 17, 2001; 6:30 1). 1 CCAC of Haltori,I I440 Elizabeth Street, 4th Floxw, 1 Btrlington IFebnay 21, 2001; 6:30 p. m. Central Puiblic Library, Auiditoriuim 120 Navy Street, 1 Oakville i~March 21, 2001; 6:30 p.m.I ICCAC of Halton, 440 Elizabeth Street, 4th Floor, Burlington :April 18, 2001; 6:30 p.m. CCAC of Halton, 1 440 Elizabeth Street, 4th Floor, 1 BturlingtonI For fur-ther information regarding Il Board meetings, please contact 1 BarbaraBai ey Marshall at: I (905) 639-5228, ext. 8921 I ,or eAu toli free 1-800-81040000 L-------------------------