The following text may have been generated by Optical Character Recognition, with varying degrees of accuracy. Reader beware!

8 - The Canadian Champion, Tuesday, November 21, 2000 Visit us ai www kftarensfl owve rs h op. cpi Teen tragedy can be overwhelming blow By IRENE GENTLE The Champion Pain has no respect for age. That was proven when a cata- strophic car/train collision brought the bitter taste of tragedy to north Halton recently. Three Acton teens, ail atudents at E.C. Drury High School, were killed in the wreck. 'Me deaths sent communities of young people, previously wrapped in the sofî cocoon of per- ceived invulnerability, reeling. And there's no lelling when lhey'Il stant t heal, said Fran Jones, Mental Health Liaison Nurse with the Halton Regionai Health Department (I-RHD). "There isn'l a set lime," she said. "Everyone goes through stages of death in a different sequence and at different limes.' When tragedy drops like a ton of bricks on the young, they're often unprepared to, deal with the blow. "Teens don'l have the life experience aduits have 10 fail back on, to know that life returus 10 normal," explained Ms Jones. TMat means tbey may need some help 10 gel through the stages of grîeving, which include dential, anger, hargaining, depression and accep- lance. "Some people can lake up 10 a year before they can feel in control'0f their lines," said Ms Jones. "It's such an individual lhing." And bereavement can occur in youlhs who didn't know the deceased well. "If the adolescent is even remolely connecîed 10 the person who died, lhere's a grief reaclion," sajd Ms Jones. "Il may lrigger previous busses. Even the bosn of s pet." These feelings may seemn overwheiming 10 youlh, who haven't the experience 10, put il in perspective. So when emotion bits with the brute impact of an 18-wheeler, leens typically reacl by either externaiizing the pain lhrough risk-taking behav- iours, or internalizing il, becomning moody and withdrawn. Bolh are signs they're having trouble coping. Aduits can help guide lhem through the burt, and allowing youths 10 grieve their Ions is s criti- cal step. So is giving Iheru permission to back away from the pain. "Teens can be very, very upset and then go out 10 a movie," said Ms Jones. "Il doesn't mean lhey're nol stili grieving, but lhey need life 10 gel back 10 normal." But even brief moments of pleasure can feel 1nntî Dy i tu UMOUVV! A youth takes lime to remnember his friends following the recent devastating train-car crash that kîlleci ihree E.C. Drury High Sohool students. Dozens of friands went ta the Actan crash site ta leave flawers and momentos. Mental health experts say when tragedy drops like a ton of bricks on the young, they're often unprepared ta deal with the blow. like a betrayal in teens who have suffered a loss, leading 10 simmering guilt feelings. "They need 10 know it's nol an act of dialoyal- ty 10 the person who died 10 enjoy life again," said Ms Jones. Those guilt feelings can boil over in leens who unrealislically feel lhey could have made a dif- ference in a tragic oulcome, leaving them stalled in the depression stage of grief. "In bereavement, an adolescent may think 'If I hsd gone with my dad or my friends, maybe this wouldn't bave happened,"' said Ms Jones. T'hough students are tlooded with help imme- diately following a crisis, people like Ms Jones step in when the initial furor dies down. She works with students in their own schools, using whal she calîs a cognitive behavioural therapy approach. Through Ihat, deep-sealed ilI feelings such as guilt are addressed. In the case of deeply depressed youths, psy- chiatric care is recommended. She noted that while parents and other adulîs have a vital role 10 play in the healing of griev- ing youths, the nature of adolescence may make il difficuit 10 open thal door. "Because of their slruggle for independence, they may feel lhey need 10 cope alone," said Ms Jones. "They may not be able 10 reach ont 10 adulîs." F.ven when confmonted, teens may flot admit t0 feeling badly. And boys are more spt 10 fmnd il difficuit to open Up than girls. But seeking the teen out and giving them full attention can help break down the wall. Basic guidelines include listening, ailowing the youth 10 express their feelings, offening sup- port, validating and acknowledging those feel- ings and permitîing open communication. Parents can also help by idenîifying healîhy coping patterns and maintaining family routines and expectations. Though tragedy assaulîs withoul discrimina- lion, the resources 10 cope are more plenliful in densely-popuiaîed areas. Thal means parents in rural areas may need 10 try a uitIle harder 10 ensure their child gels the aid lhey need. Sometimes we liav- 10 be more active in gel- ling help for our teens," said Ms Joncs. Some resources include HRHD, Hatton Family Services, Canadian Mental Health Association, Burlinglon Bereavement Resource Council, family doctors, private couniselbors, the local library, crisis uines and funeral homes. 7:wCOGECO 14 Programming Schedule - November 2lst, 200 oebr2t,20 9din4I70 www.cogeco.ca %Pt Ulmeiit 8 st, Ta-ci~ 7a "YwuecCa NORTH HALTON STUDIO Sa I -SÇ 21 Main Street Nèrth P1~ I'Sp lb WdM Acton, ON L7J 1V9 MCciâkibw (519) 853-4700 Feature this week: Federal Election info ai this week & election resuits on SportsZONE Uve, Monday, Nov. 27th1 -J