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Whby Fe rsWednlesd Jne 12, 19l6, Page 7 *~«~W~' .........................................................~. Only after he gets this bright idea, he eplits with his wife, who, is the. other haif of the tornado teams and she gets -the grant money to have the sensors made. (The. sensor is called Dorothy, which you will figure out if you've seen Wizard of Oz). Anyhow. Theres divorc papers ta, sign, theres the new girlfriend, sort of Wendy Whiner type, a, reproduction therapiet, no lees (dont ask); and a darkr, evil rival who steals the sensors idea, and relies on computers ta tell hlm about tornadoes. Only our hero, whose name is so instantly forgettable I forget it. .. (Instant edit: it's Bill, you twit. How could you fordet that. Bill.) Yeah. This Bill, h. can sense a tornado, breathes their soul, can aniff their direction i the summer wind. Of course, h. has computer download stuif on his crew, too, but h.e stili sniffs pretty good. So. You wi th us so far? Good, cause that's it. The rest is special effects, which, if you always wanted ta get within five metres; of a tarnado muet be darneti fascinating. The effects include the floating cows tractors, trees, houses, flying 18-wheelers,,exploding tankers, the lot. Not that taraadoes have ever tassed tliings that big inta the sly here' and dropped them down there, no, no. But if you can imagine tornadoes bigger thaxi, well, tornadoes, well, tliey might. Maybe. Experts have written about the science (or lack of it) i this script. Ail I could find was two references te tth. Fujita scale, which rates tarnadoes from F0, ta F5, zero being weak, and F5 bemng pretty strong. Tiie tarnado that ripped homugh Barrie ia 1985, was rated at F4 (interior winds from 330-416 Iilometres per hour, according ta the Canadian Encyclopedia). No Canadian tarnado has reached F5. But not to, worry. Twister is an American movie, and as we know, Hollywood is not adverse ta making things bigger thaa 11f. Thus, while real twisters vary from a few metres t aa couple of hundred metres i width (median 83 metre's i width), the. giant killer in the movie is "a mile wide." Close the,.oophoes Twisted Ifyou Sneaaee-pt that Twister could only be a ki de movie then -you night view it as pretty good fare. That is, you could overlook all the. silliness and take it as it is: an okay movie with a trite plot and gangbuster special effects. Talk ta, kids after the3eve seen it, aad-you know what madie the. biggest impression: yeah, thats right, the special efects. . ,Where else would you see a cow iftig by your windshield at slightly more than shoulder height? This is a mooovie, alright! IIow trite is the plot, do you ask? Let mne tell you. Se., theres this guy who thunk up hundreds cf tiny sensors that will b. released ineide a tarnado. That way, weather scientists* will b. able ta predict tarnadoes better, and save human lives. And stuif. I JOHN HAM PEBRY'S CASILE, C. 1905 The younger son of Whitby's founder Peter Perry bufit this Italianate style mansion in 1857 on the. site of the former swimming pool in Kinsmen Park. He had ta, give up bis castle in 1877 and it staod abandoned until it was demolisbed during the.First World War. Perry called his home "Dinsbaugh," an old family name. WhltbyArchives photo 10 YEARS AGO - from the Wednesday, June 11, 1986 edition of the. WHITY FREEPRESS " Beth Jacobson of Ashburn is tbe 1986 Broolclin Spring Fair Queei.- " Six persons.were arrested for the murder of Walter Clark Major four years ago as a result of the Crime Stopper program. " There will b. no more pbeasant buntitig permitted in Wbltby by 1987.> " Jean Achxnatowicz ofAsbburn will b. honoured in Ottawa with 'avolunteer award for her work in health and social services i Whitby. 35 YEARS AGO from the Thursday, June 8, 1961 edition of the WmMTBY WEEIKLY NEWS " A truck driver who did flot report the accident collapsed a bridge on the 4th Concession of Whitby Township. " Andrew Antenna on Beech Street will triple the size of ita factary this year. " Selection of the Ontario County Dairy Queen will b. a feature of the Whitby Trade Fair at the arena. " 'Four memorial windows at Graoe Chapel, Ontario Ladies' College, were dedicated on June 4. 100 YEARs AGO fromntbe Friday, June 12, 1896 edition of the W~TBY CHONICLE " Joseph A. Bandel, proprietor of the Whitby House Hotel, died on June 5 at the age of 70. * The Dominion Oddfello* magazine featured a biography and photo of Wbitbys Col. J.E. Farewell, wbo is a candidate for Warden of the Grand Lodge. * The Hon. G.W. Rosa, Ontario Minister of Education, will address a Liberal meeting at the Town Hall tonight. * The phonograph concert advertised for Brooklin last week did not corne off because there was no audience. 1« 77- > Il, ýlll ý'. ý- - - Il- 1 >ý < ý >ý,,71ý-ý,-,Q,ýB7ý,ýý4ý,ý"--ý,4ýçý,'>,",14"".«,ýýl-ý,.,,,ýi > - - Rqm By Alez Shepherd Ii there a law for the rich and another for the poor? Thafst'hei conclusion of a recent Auditor Generals report showing that wlth the blessing. of Revenue Canada, in one day, two days before Christmas, an unnarned farnily removed $2, billion out of the country without paying capital gains tax. The auditor also said Revenue Canada "may have circmvented the intont of the law." Anyone reading this column, 1 would guss, doesnt have anytblng- near $2 billion. But if you bad a tax problem, you couldnt get access to Revenue Canada officiais in on. day to deal with it.' Hlow did a ich family get aîegal opinion from Revenue Canada, an opinion which has the potential ta, change tax law, within hours? And how corne the paperwork ta justify* Revenue Canada'. permission to tac. tihe money out of the country arrived in the file after the decision was mnade? Revenue Canada bas very strict guidelines about Canadians leaving the. country with their wealth in a suitcase for obvious reasons; the biggest of wbich la that tax money le bard to collect after youlve left. But If recent history is any indication, the. wealthy only have ta, produce a couple of letters agreeing ta, let Revenue Canada know when tbey seIl taxable property that is taxable. What's more alârming is that'the Auditor General belleves these soeaps of, paper are unenlbrfceable. With that ln mlnd, Just Imagine If someone owned Revenue Canada money, then said they were golng ta live ln the Grand Caymian lalands and gave Revenue Canada an IOU. What do you think theywould say? 1%e $2-blllon incident occured in 1991 when Mulroneys govenment was begging ta b. put out ofita misery. The.question is: was-there political interference on that governments pfirt? It sees trange- a family 'could get preferential treatznent when there is no benefit ta, Canada. This family earned its money in Canada from Canadians like you and me. They have an obligation ta tbis country. They are free ta leave, but pay your bills before you close'the. door 'behind you. Few citizens can take advantage of a tax break 1&e. this. Really they are designed to avoid. taxes on the wealth accumulation of the. very wealthy. No wonder average income Canadians become cynical of the. tax systom when they witness this kInd, of behaviour. Alex Shepherd is MP for Durham riding whidh indudesu Whitby, north of Taunton RoacL To reach hie conatituency office, oeil 721-7570 (Oahowa). ii~I ~III 'b,' For ail the bigger stufi, Michael Crichton and crew missed some of the subtlety which could have made this one sizzle. The paradoxes that tornadoes create: to pick out' one Iree, and leave its sisters standing; to take out one wall of a house, and leave the dishes unbroken in the cabinet; ofparking vehicles halfway up trees; of sheet metal siding tied 60 feet up a pine trunk like a ribbon. 'Ible terror, and power, of real tornadoes lurks in their surgical precision. But enough of smail details. Would 1 go see this movie again? Probably not. But if I had not seen iLt, I still would. And so should you, if only for laughs.