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lrUti July Entertainment Outlook Ed Broadbent doesnt look like Joseph Stalin Tory backbench- the warning before its late According lo the latest polls nearly per cent of Canadians are toying with the idea of voting NDP In the next federal election This very notion takes getting used to since Canadians not the federal as a parly of government When you been mired In opposition as long as the NOP you gel regarded at best as a party of conscience of Indeed the analysts maintain that Canadians are merely threatening vote NDP because HERITAGES NOTES while Prime have reduced Tory support to members of his Immediate family Still the fact remains that Canadians are flirting with the idea of electing an And it has fallen to the Torle explain to us what this would They have published a newsletter warning that the of the would mean the election of a Just doesn I loi like Josef Stalin If hi grew moustache and look lo the Ed ibis dire reillzatlon when the telephone rang It was an acquaintance of mine a member of NOP His voice shook as he requested a midnight meeting In an alley He had Just received from headquarters that so terrified Mm that he wished to leak II the Press The letter was signed Chairman Ed and it began Dearest Once you Have read this teller eat It immediately we recommend shredding it and putting II In a nice salad for its contents not be made known to those outside Our Glorious Party The later launched into a lengthv description of the revenge an NDP government would take upon capitalist running dogs and Imperialist lackeys It concluded by outlining Soviet style program that Ihe will undertake If it wins next election While Canadians arc still shell shocked by the discovery that the cabinet is now the polltburo and it it Includes a Minister of launch a sweeping restructuring of nations economy Slop one will be the introduction of a file year plan for agriculture In order be faithful iovltt models II Is essential lliat this plan tall completely The NDP will accomplish this by paving Saskatchewan and metropolitan Toronto a collective farm Next he will launch a crackdown on dissidents aimed at silencing them completely and obliterating them former from public memory This will be accomplished by appointing them all lo Senate three Is a atUiupt lo establish a communist beach head in the The will force a letter from the Governor Rhode begging Canada to send troops to put down Republican Insurgents Onci agrlcullui Industry is ruined Its dissidents silenced and a puppet government Is Installed In It node Island the NDP will undertake the savage measure of all It will send every member of the Oilers into internal exile on Island thus guaranteeing that Team Canada will never beat he Russians again TRIO NOW AVAILABLE CUR MOORE PARK STORE MOVIE RENTALS Spring brings two great migrations to Point Pclce National Park birds which arc returning north and people who flock to the park to observe them There are so many birds the park during the peak of the season that an experienced observer may count 150 species in a single day The height of the waterfowl migration occurs in April although thousands of Redbreasted Mergan sers will linger offshore in Lake Eric until well into May Tor birders however the highlight of the season is when nearly varieties of colourful warblers arrive in early May For more information about Point National Park contact Envi ronment Canada Parks Service lit Water Street East Cornwall Ontario K6H N ELLS DRIVING SCHOOL Next Course Sept 30th Monday Wednesday 630930 Cotaae or Private Lessons PHONE Approved by Ontario Safety League GEORGETOWN MINOR HOCKEY ASSOCIATION MONSTER DABBER BINGO FUNDRAISING EVENT THURSDAY AUGUST 6 1987 700 PM GORDON ALCOTT ARENA TOTAL PRIZE MONEY 0000 22 GAMES JACKPOT 200 SUPER JACKPOT 4 REGULAR SPECIALS 15 GAMES