Ontario Community Newspapers

Flesherton Advance, 29 May 1902, p. 6

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itf*-' Â¥ â- B^ BUIOAKING THE NEWS GENTLY. "What do you want, little boyt" "Is tliU whore Mr. Upjohn Uvea, ma'- im!" "YCB." "Tlio Mr. Upjohn that runs the kankr" "lie is an olHcer in the bank." "The Mr. Upjohn that went down- town on a trolley car this morning?" "1 presume he went' on a trolley car. V'hat is " "Is he the Mr. Upjohn that was In that horrible street car accident?" "I haven't heard of his being in any Btrect car accident." 1 "Didn't, hoar 'at he'd sprained his 'ankle jumpin' out o' the car when the train run into it?" "No, my little boy; you frighten me. AVliat has " « "Didn't hear how he run into a drug alore for .1 piece o' court-plaster to • stick on a little cut he'd got over the eye?" "Not at all. For mercy's sake " • "He Isn't in, is he, ma'am?" • "No; he's " . „ "Name's John U. Upjohn, isn't it! , "Yes; that's his name." 4 "Then he's the same man. He won't lie here for an hour or two, I guess, "cause he's stoppin' to have one o' his teeth tightened that got knocked a lit- |tlo bit loose when he was jumpin' out 'o' danger, y' know." ;' "Little boy, tell me the whole story. \\ think I can bear it now." I "Well, ma'am, he's in the hospittle iwith four ribs broke, an' one leg's in a ^sling, an' his nose is knocked Kind o' j sideways, but he's gettin' along all 'tight, an' he'll be out again in about la month, an' here's a letter f'm the doc- 'tor tcUin' y' all about it, ma'am." A THOUSAND TEAMS. JEAN BOIVUE IS VERV HEARTY IN HIS EXPRES- SIONS OF GRATITUDE. tn Graceful Sentences He Pour.s Out His Praise of Dodd's Kidney Pills, the Remedy Which Has ' Done So Much tor Him. St. Klzciir, Que, Mny 20.â€" (Sjio- .fial) â€" It is a well known chiiraclcii>i- tic of our Kreiich CiiiiuiJiiui i)eop!o, thi\t Ihcy are fumicsii and enthcsins- tic in tlicir juai.se ot an.ytliiiiK or unyliody that has befriended Ihcm. No one i.s more ciipahlc of fiiace- fully exprcssiiitf tiialitudo tlian iho B.vcrngo French gentleman. ; A recent cnso illu-stiates this point, I Mons. Joan Uoivuc has for many years h.jsn aflliclcd .vilu a leirilile malady of tho Kidnoy.s. Ho .siifTerod a \L'iy groat dc.-il of pain, and his di.scaso forced him to rise ovmy hour during the night, i Ho was advised to use Dodd's Ki<(- ney PilLs, and after taking a short treatment, found himself completely cured. I His gr.-iti tilde knew no bounds-, and over .since he nus iccoiiimon<!ed to all his frieiid.s the wonderful iemed,\ which f.,-od him .so promptly and completely. ) When he linds anyone who has no oonli'dciico in them, his fust act is to give them some rills, and e.xpliiiii to them how to use thein, and he has found this method very sooi: con'vinccH the most skeptical of th( truth of the slatemont he niako' that Dodd's ICidiicy Dills are th( greatest medicine in tho world. Mon.'*. Hoivi.'o says : "Dodd'H ICidney fill.'? are good. "I know this l)ccuu^e while at one time 1 sulTered very soveiel.v from Kidiiey Disease, now I am well.. "Not long ago T used to have to got up sovoral times during tho night now 1 can sleep well all night with- out rising. ' "Vou can believe nio. I am glad to have regained my health, and I say thanks a tliousand times to Dodid's Kidnev Dills." HIS MOTHEU'S DAULINO. "My niece Mary was (ilwnys n woll- jneaning girl, but she would say the wrong thing almost eveiy time," Bald one old gentleman to another; ("and she's got a boy that's going to be her very counterpart." Tho old gentleman's cyea twinkled,^ and his plain, good-natured face was' puckered with enjoyiAent as ho drew from his i>()cUet-book iv .small sheet- of note paper, . , , », "I Bent llal a to.v monke.v that plays all kinds of pranks when it's .wound up," sail! lie, chuckling. "Sent it to him for his birthdny. Now you listen to this letter of thanks 1 got from hint to-day. Jl8''s just eight years old; â-  •.. " 'Deer Uncle No<l,,t-T am flelitcd with the inunkey, thank you. Ho makes mo think of yon very olien. And wheneker nininma winds him up nnd ho begins to jump, mamma niul I feel ns it wo wore buck iit your house where all those toys arc, and mamma will look at the munkey and' Bay, 'That's your Undo Ned nil over." " 'Qood-b.vo from i " 'your grentfull fTal,' V; Results from common soaps: eczema, coarse hands, ragged clothes, shrunken flannels. SmOJGHT Sqkp RSDVCES SXPSNSS Aik r«r lbs OetecoB Bar »n Indian lilnirllali. An intelligent sepoy one day came to a telegr.npb of&ce in India and handed Id a message to send to a station in central India. Having read the mes- sage, the operator said there was some- thing wrong. "No, sahib; me knows English," be said. Again an attempt was made to explain to him that It was wrongly worded. "Me knows English," he declared baugbtily and Indignantly. "If you no sena, me re- port Superintendent Mandalay." Thus threatened, the message was forward- ed, "Come quick; father dangerously dead." One War to Cut Ornaa. To cut shift brass chemically the fol- lowing method meets with great suc- cess: Make a strong solution of bichlo- ride of mercury In alcohol. With a qulllpen draw a line across the brass where It is to be cut. Let It dry on, and with the same pen draw over this line with nitric acid. The brass may then be, broken across like glass cut with a diamond. * Pimples. A great many persons are troubled with pimples on the face, which are un sightly at best, and especially annoying when they come, as they often do, on the nose. Of course they arise from some Impurity of the blood and need constitutional treatment, but until this is obtained a safe and easy way of pre- venting them is to apply arnica to the skin. A pimple never comes without warning. A few hours before there la always u slight Indammatloa or swell Ing, and If a drop of arnica be applied to the spot when tho swelling begins half a dozen applications In the course ot a day will drive the pimple back un^ der the skin. js'rniiro pnys for her pnuptis by moans of a (iix of 10 per coot, on ull theatre tickets sold. F»r Over SUty V««rJ Mm. WiNsi.ow a ,SnoTHiNa evmrp ha^ hien mad by mtltimii of inolliffr» for lh«ir r|^ll<lr»n while Ireihlnf Itinoth«n Itm child, Foft'jn^ tliR Hunt*, all 1175 imiii, cur*i vlDd L'ltlic, rffffiilalffl tliii fiomiuih hatl ho\re1#, kdi) 1i (h« bftt rtiiiictl) Utx i>tarih<i^n. TKaD^rAvn reiilx a hitil*. â- olii tif 'Irugfltlf lUrouglioui (he worlil H,. ^iir* and mA f«t "M»4. \v'iN»i.ow Jt.SooTHisiiHvniff.' "Mnrry my daughter ? ^Vii.v. slio'a a mere child." "I know it ; but T ^thoiisht I'd couie early and avoid itbe mail." The Obedient Child. There was once a little girl who found it very hard to wash her bauds just before dinner. She mo.int to be clean for the table, but there was so many things to think of that It was Impossible to remoi.*ber. Her mother reproved her very severely one day, and she promised to do better. That day nt dinner her mother asked the usual question, "Have you washed your hands, dear?" "V'es," cnmo the satisQed reply. Her mother looked Bmilingly down at the little one's hands, and then she ut- tered an exclamation, for there was no sign that soap or water had been used on them. "Why, your hands are black," she snld. "Didn't you say you washed thorn?" "Well, I Just did, mamma, but I was afraid I'd forget, so I washed them right after breakfast."- Bla Chance. Wickersâ€" I don't know what Is the matter with me. My memory is get- ting so treacherous that I cannot truai It from one week to the next. 'â- ''ckorsâ€" Is that so? I say, can you lend me $10 for about thirty days'/ Poor Choice. Tenderfoot (nervously) â€" I don't like the looks of the hotel. Is that the only place 1 can put up? Proprietor (significantly)â€" Y-n-n-s, un- less you nrefer the graveyard over the hill. Pew people over really want a thing until they see others chasing after It , London consumes 11 tons of salt a day. FLAKE PIE. TRUST. Take one-half cupful lard to a pint of flour, rub well together (or better, cut it in the flour with a knife) ; take water suillclent to make a dough (not too stiff) . lloll out and spread with but- ter; fold over evenly after sprinkling tho butter slightly with flour. Then form it into a roll from the opposite direction and roll out and spread again with butter and flour; then roll over and over into a large roll, and cut from tho ends. A very little of the stiflly- bcaton white of an egg stirred into the water is an improvement. 7>fee^ Aafl4 Beware of Ointments fop Catarph that eontaln Movcupy 09 morcury will â-ºuroly destroy iho seiian of BmellftiKlioinpletclyrteranije the whole evstsm when eiitartng it through the inni cm mirfacoi Such articlca >'hoiild never bu usiid cxcoiit en niotrripiiom from ro|)ui;ililephyflcianB,iiH tho damiige t.lioy will do la mo folrt tnthii good yo)i Clin possibly lie: Im from thom. Ha I'nCuturrh Cine, iiianufaeliircd liy RJ. Cheney & Co., To. lodo,:.<).,coiitaiim no mercury, nnd in taken in- lernully, acting dlieotly n|ion th8 blood and (niiicoin MirfaccK of the xyhtoin. In buying Ildirs Cfttarrh I'uro bosuroyougot the Konu Ini'. It Is nkon hiternury.und made in Toledo Ohio; by F. J. Ohcney & (Jo. TcstiinonlaU tree. .Sold by nnicgiiitii, price 7,10 per bottle. Ilall'ii Family I'llls are the beet. In IHiVl 0l^•ory English person would hiive had 4 1-5 ncros as his sluuo of land. Now he would get hut J i acres. Monkey Brand Soap mnkos copper liko gold, tin like silver, crockery like marble, nnd windows like irystal. Tho average depth of tho Irish sea is 210 fei't ; of tho Knglish Chnniicl no fe<;t. MInafiJ's LioliDBot Cures Burns, etc, ;M,000 square miles of Greenland belong to Denmarik, and this area has 1(1,000 inhabitajits. ft produces 12,000 barrels of whale-blitbber a year. THE EEVIVAL. THE CUEIOUS UPS AND DOWNS OF THE WHEEI,. Almost in the Catalogue of "has beens" â€" Now Popular Ererywnere. The varying mood of the public. Influenced as it is by fads and fash- ions, is a curious srt,Kdy. In this re- gard there is no more intei'osting history than that of the blcyclo. From its crude introduction until the pneumatic tire and cushion frame were established its progress was remarkable, and the climax was I cached three yc.irs ago when vi\wa- ing amounted to a positive craze. ITien there were black days, but this I'oar again finds it in universal fa- 70T. The truth is, there aever will ht anything to take tho place of 'jh» bicyclo as a convenience, es^je- dally in the country where one has p.ot city accommodation for travel. Tho big revival is duo to this and «•> the fact that a good bicyclo is now within easy reach of any pocket book. Thinking: about a Wheol 7 If you want to get one of the be.9t wheels made anywhero â€" wheels made for comfort and wear â€" onuuiro about the "Ma.sse.v-Harris," "Cloveland," '•Brantford" and "Perfect" bicycles. Drop a cai-d for a catalogue to Can- ada Cycle & Motor Co.. 34 King St., West, Toronto. t», 000,000 bird.s -nests, for soii'p- imiking, are brought into Canton in a year. It takes 50 to mitko a pound, and they cost $:!.50 an ounce. TO (Till; .4 f:oLl> i\ OXR my, Take Laxaliye Orooio Quinine Tablota A 1 drUKKlots refund the monoy if it faiU to cure. B. w, GroTe'H sisnatore 's on aacb bos. Sio, There have been 2,100 explosions ill coal-mines in the Inst TiO years, il^volving a loss of 8,800 livo.s. '4inaf(j's Lloiment for sale ever^wliErt 100,000 bales of cotton lusted the Lanca.shire mills (or a your in 1800; now the siuno amount would feed thoir spindles for a day and a qiiar- ter. C. C. RICHARDS & CO. Gentlemen,â€" I have used MIN- Mtirs LINIMliNT on my vessel and in my fiimily tor years, and for every da.v ills and accidents of life I coiisiilor it has no equal. J would not sstart on a voyage without it, if it co.st a dollar a bottle. CAPT. F. R. DKSJAUDIN. Schr. ".Storke," St. Andre, Ka. mourusku. NOW IS THE TIME TO BUY THEM ; THEY AEE GOOD AMD CHEAP AND WILL BE OVEE IN A FEW DAYS. The Dawson Commission Co., Limited, Toronto. Consignments of Produce Solicited. -zn, ^P & & 'â- :^m 1= The Frost 10 Wire and 6 Slay Fence is the strongest and heaviest wire fence made â€" ^ood openiogn 'â-  for good agents ; write us at once for terms. Ask for catalc}^. ' THE FROST WIRS FENCE CO., VTELUAND, ONT. Paint up your bouso, your buildings, your fences, everything that should be painted, and do It well. Pay a fair price, but don't pay any more. Get Ramsay's Paints and you get the hest that goes in the world of pa.int making. You get pure colors, pure oil : better tWn white lead or n»y other mixture to preserve, to beautify, to last, and at the right price. Drop ua a card and ask for BOOKLET "K" FREE. showing how some homes ore painted. I I A. RAMSAY & SON, Eitak. 1S4a e 9* MONTREAL Paint MaKefs J Nelly â€" "(.'holly's tlio iiiijst stupid m;in 1 ovor met. \\q> never has u thing in his bond." Nollâ€" •â- f)h, you wrong liini. I mot him in tho street to-day, and he ^iuiil, Aw, good bordig, lli.ss Dolly." nriAN HALirS WIT. ^ In Ilia new volume, entitled "Now and Then," which tho venerable Dean Hole of Kochestcr has just issued, there arc n any pleaiurablo anecdotes, a few old nnd many new. One of the most time- worn, but still one of tlio most ti(;k- ling, l3 that about a jury at an Irish aisize.4, most of wliom whin told liy tho Judgo to go to their usual places forth- with walked into the dock. Another anecdote, bearing on the tem- perance riucstion, is as follows: â€" "John," said a clergyman to one of his parish- ioners, who had been in the habit of tarrying long at the wine, "John, I'm pleased to see you've got a nice new pig. t know you've been wanting to buy one for a lotig time. How did you manage it at last?" "Well, sir," said John, "\ guv up raakin' a pig of myself!" Hut the Dean's best tale is of a par- son who was in the habit of offering up the following prayer for Queen Adclnido: â€" "0 Lord, save thy servant, our sovereign lady, the QneenI Qrant thnt ns she grows an old woman she mny become a new man; strengthen her with thy blessing, that she may live a pure virgin, bringing forth sons and daughters to the glory of God; and give her grace, that she may go forth before her people like a he-goat on the moun- tains," Manuna â€" "Fighting again ? Why, a good little boy wouldn't hurt a hair of another boy's head." Johnny â€" "Well, I didn't I I just punched his nose." Minafi's Liniment Cufes Dandroff, S^mdny lisland in the Pacific is really the tallest mountain in tho woi-ld. It rises 2,000 feet out of live miles of water, i^linafd's Liniment RelisyesNeufalgla. Uritish charities have an endow- ment of £2,500,000 ; those of France. £2,400.000. But British ha\o ail income from suhscriptions ot nearly sewn millions : French of only a million and a half. stop* tlir Fans1> an«I workii off tlio t'olil. . Laxallv* Bromo-(3uinino Tableta euro a oold In one day. No i uro. No Fay. Prico SSoente. Saiwlringham, which King Edward VII. purchased out of hi;,> savings, has a rental of £7 O(^o a vear. H W P C. 1130 liOMSUM Preheated and Oyred. pour niaLTvelGssa free rcmedlisofor oil . fiufferers reading thio p>ipsE'. £Vaw C'jro for Tu&et-culos!a:Canci(aip« tiou, W(»k Laags, Cctorrii, , aud a ruudovn aystco:. THE MOST POPULAR OilNTI PRIOit. CALVERT'S CAR BOLIC TOOTH POWDER. Pru«rvM tli» ttath. SwMtins the brtatli. Strsngthens the %\um. ^ I ^£3a3 Do you cough ? Oo your lungs {>a!n you ? Is your throat soraand infljuoed? Do you spit up phlegta ? Does your hcacf arhe ? Is your appetite bad? Are your lurig^ delicate? Are you losing flesh ? Are you pals and thin ? Do you lack stamina ? These symptoms aro proof that yow have in your body the seeds of the most dangerous malady that has ever devas- tated the earth â€" consumption. You nrc Invit«cl to test what this system will do for t'OLi, if you aro nick, by writing for a FREE TRIAL. TREATR^EPJT Rnd the Four Free Preparitlons â- Â«fill be forwanled you Rt oacB, with complete directions !l^r us-s. The Sturum Sjstcm is ap<«iitivoi:uro for Consumer tlon, that most insiJtotis tiiiKiasR. and for alt Luajr Troubles and Disordcn), coTtiuHcaicci by I.,rwB ol l^t«sh, Couffh!K Catarrh. Astiimat Bironchilts an4 Heart Troubles. Simply write to thd T. A. J^Iticum Chemic&l CotTipany, I,:niitcd, 179 Kinjf Street \Vc.t, Toronto, irl^HIn^ po.ft office and e^preim address, and iho fre* iiicdicmB(thc SKkijiti Cure) \\'\\\ b« promctty vent. PpDsons in C'nnat^a weing' Slocum's iVee offer in Amrrtam papt>.rs will pleaito seed for â- nrnjilâ€" M Toronto. Mcntioti tluspaiicxv Brd$$ Band Inalrumenta, Drumt, Uniforms, Bto. EVERY TOWN CAN HAVE A BAND -Jt'.*?,"®''' prices ever ouotod. Fine oatalogua jOOllluHtrfHlons,m»il*dfree. Write ua for any. thing in .Uiislr.nr UnslrnI luslrnnivnl'. WHiLEY MOE& 00., Limited, Toronto. Ont. and VTinnipoK. Man FRENCH GLEANING. ror made op Qoodi, Rnits In Clo h. Vehet, SUk or Tun and ill ralusble hout* HanuiDgn, aothia| lo equal it U dona by Ilia UITISH AUSRltAN ftYSIHQ 00.. HontrMl, SUNBURN Mho any other form of Inflammation Is I oattily hoaled by CIliADINt. No otbor nintment relieves pain so quickly, -it is not an ansssthttic, but a healer. 250, Drugrarlatt, or Ciltatlin* Oo,, Tormta. Monsy refunded If not satlsfaotory TOPRiNTERI FOR 3ALS â€" Tw3 Z-revolutlon Campbalt Presses, bad ^fiâ- ^ Inohss. SplendU order. PriG0$i,O03eech. Terms sasy. S. FRANK WILSOHv 73 West DdBlaK'e St. , Toronto Dominion Line Steamtiiips MonlroAl to Urervool. Hofitoa to liT•^ po'tl. ForilaDvl to LlvtrpooL Via Qu«cni' town. Ijarxe aud y&atStf.^nishipi. Superior acoommodalloa for All classes of t)ii>ionKort. 8iklooii« and 3(iki«r(-oiu9 art til.Ubipa. Spwlal ntttutlon haa l»«;n giT«n t.j tb« B«<oi;.i 9;tloon ami ThirU-Clai« a.^eanimodHtloii. For mtiai'f iMMciOifj and all parviculara, a;iplj to tujr a;;eut ottho Company, or Uich.irda, Mills Ji Co. D. Torrancp A Co.. XI State au Bofitoa. Mouireolanl ^on>v.iJ* WANTED RELIABLE AGENTS Wo w.»lj' at ouco tru.'itwoithy laou ami w>;nti-i j» every !tx,alUy. I'icul or t r.-»Tolin.^, to liit «» Int.-* a m? (Urc-»verf nnd ktc-p our shiwc rlsand alrirtU'at nmst<!r tricked up in conaiilcLioirt vl {ei throLnthiuS l.u town !iu1 eouutTy. Kteadji cm^iyaioat ye«r ro;iil (-omnilMlon of i'ol.irv, $01.00 p^r flonth naJ Lxpcnse^, not 10 exceed slC'O p'r dny. AVrile for panicula-.--. ro'tui'iae b'.Tc 3S7, !HTEaMATlO!*AL MEDICiME COo lO.^COH. OMT \VOOD vHpMOTO.EVCRAVING, "106 BAY &T»EeT.-TO«ONfO <Ji ^ k^iXis.

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