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The witness was sworn in again and this time with a Bible just to make sure he told the ‘ According to Judge J, Kevin Mulroy the jury was laughing so hard: "It took us 10 minutes to straighten everybody out." By day four the ongoing arguâ€" ment "It‘s a handful, Chad. No way, man, it‘s a mouthful at best" was really starting to get to me. I swear if each and every one of these guys wasn‘t twice as big and twice as fit as me, I‘d have slapped one or two of them silly. So rather than make airplanes out of the local newspapers as the players do so very well, I read them and discovered that that particular part of the United States is every bit as quirk as Canada. In Syracuse, our first stop, a bored court attendant reading a romance novel leapt to her feet when summoned by the judge in a murder trial and proceeded to swear in a key witness with his hand solemnly place over Danielle Steele‘s latest novel. spent last week on the road Iwith a professional minor league baseball team touring Upstate New York on a 6â€"game road tip that included Syracuse, Oneonta and Glen Falls. As the writer and associate producer of a baseball film entitled Chasing The Dream, I could not have been more thrilled as the temperature hit 100°F, the humidity factor caused inanimate objects to perâ€" spire and the testosterone level of 25 horny young men away from home caused the bus‘s two perâ€" fectly normal windshield wipers to begin flapping wildly on their won in an attempt to actually brush up against each other. Never a dull moment in small town America baseball towns So astonished are they by the price of food in this country they have managed to circumvent the lineups at our grocery stores â€" they bring all their meat up here with them. Take our friends, Larry and Laura, from Grosse Point near Detroit, who are forever bemoanâ€" ing the price of groceries up here. number of plates. Now, spot Americ coolers they of their vans Of cheap meat and how great it is to live in Canada We cordially invite you to attend the official opening of a new Fire Station at 1510 Postmaster Drive (Upper Middle Road and Third Line), at 10:15 a.m. on Friday, August 20, 1993. Fire Chief W. Gould Aug. 11, 1993 TOWN HALL MEETING CALENDAR ~ COMMENT "Just how can you feed your There are no scheduled Council or Standing Committee meetings for the week of August 16, 1393. PUBLIC NOTICE OFFICIAL OPENING OF NEW FIRE STATION t used to be you coul the throng of Americ itOrs to the cottace V"§ of American visâ€" o the cottage by the _ Michigan license , these days, you can ans by the number of unload from the back you could count Meanwhile tow DJ‘s at WNTQâ€"FM in Syracuse urged their listeners to send them bananas through the mail. I don‘t know why somebody would want truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth and not some wellâ€" woven tale about a brother and sister who fall in love and can‘t be separated for a least four hunâ€" dred pages. PuD And so, they now bring all their meat with them. Their coolâ€" ers line up outside their cottage alongside the bathing suits, the blue box and the shells and stones from the beach. "We still have to buy the bread family?" They ask in astonishâ€" ment, noting that family staple â€" the lowly hot dog â€" rings in at a higher price than what they pay at home. 1225 TRAFALGAR ROAD + OAKVILLE, ONTARIO + L6J 5A6 TOWN OF OAKVILLE s345â€"6601 PUBLIC MEETINGS 1225 Trafalgar Road, Oakville For further information concerning user fees and the sport grant process, please contact Bob Perkins, Director of Parks and Recreation, at 845â€"6601, Extension 3112. Judith Muncaster, Town Clerk Town of Oakville 1225 Trafalgar Road Oakville, Ontario L6J 5A6 D NOTICE OF TWO Anyway this being the hottest week of the summer the Syracuse mail box system looked like it had been slimed by a dinosaur breathing fire and tropical baby food. The mush shut down one of Syracuse‘s three main cancelling machines. For the record, an average banana takes $1.45 in stamps making it one of your costlier fruits to post. I checked the Syracuse phone book and luckily nobody by the name of Chiquita lives in that town. to receive a banana through the mail but then again I don‘t underâ€" stand why in California raisins sing and dance. And as always when I talk to people from the States I am amazed at their forthrightness, their friendliness and their overâ€" whelming generosity. Tonight, we Now Larry, the father of his three girls, is a baker. "Yup, we‘ve got the biggest store on the east side," he says proudly. On this particular evening, the sun was still hot at 8p.m., the kids were happy playing in the water and we sat on the stones on the beach just talking desultorily about this and that. and milk â€" which they claim is "a fortune" â€" but we just can‘t afford to pay the prices for meat up here that you do," they claim. THE OAKVILLE BEAVER Very little happened in Oneonta but they do have the Wilber National Bank in that town fostering hope that in my life time I will see the system of capitalism evolve to the point of accepting Doug & Dottie‘s Just north of Syracuse it was The Revenge Of The Roadhill when a beaver repeatedly attacked a motor boat. The beaver was rabid and later destroyed; the boat was dented but survived. Also fortunate was the fact the DJ‘s stopped at bananas when "key lime pie" and "you sister‘s hair" appeared further down the list. "I love my work," he says, describing in detail the life of a baker. While we sit rather reticently, the very picture of the tongue tied Canadians, the affable 40 year old baker â€" whose most proud achievement was the cake shaped into a coffin for a 50â€"yearâ€"old birthday â€" sits on the beach near his daughter and tells us how great life is in the States. learn not only exactly how much Larry makes an hour ($10, by the way), he works 12 to 14 hours a day six days a week and gets along well with his motherâ€"inâ€" law. for the following work: 7 1. Construction of approximately 1330 square metres of new concrete sidewalks. 2. Reconstruction or repair of approximately 665 square metres of existing sidewalks, 360 metres of existing curbs, 900 square metres of existing asphalt pavement and 31 square metres of existing brickpaver crosswalks. Plans, specifications and tender forms will be available on or after Tuesday, August 9, 1993 and may be obtained from the Department of Public Works, 2274 Trafalgar Road for a nonâ€" returnable payment of THIRTY dollars ($30.00), GST included. The Contractor whose tender is accepted shall be required to post a Performance Bond satisfactory to the Town Council, equal to 100% of the Contract Price, and a Labour and Material Payment Bond totalling 50% of the contract price. A certified cheque or Bank/Trust Co. Draft for the amount specified in the tender documents must accompany each tender. Tenders will be opened publicly at a meeting of the Tender Opening Committee at the Oakville Municipal Building, 1225 Trafalgar Road, Oakville, Ontario on Tuesday, August 24, 1993 at 2:30 p.m. Local Time. The lowest or any tender will not necessarily be accepted. Director & Department of Public Works SEALED TENDERS, on forms provided will be received by the Town Clerk, 1225 Trafalgar Road, P.O. Box 310, Oakville, Ontario, L6J 5A6 until 2:00 p.m. Local Time on But increasingly it is difficult CONTRACT NO. Swâ€"27â€"93 TENDER FOR CONCRETE SIDEWALK CONSTRUCTION AND ROADWAY PAVEMENT REPAIRS Ellis, P. Eng., In a city park near downtown Glen Falls a dog trying to escape the heat crawled into a shady hole and was trapped for four hours under he statue of Moses. After finally being freed by local firemen with a jawsâ€"ofâ€"life device, the dog and his owner In Glen Falls a very deterâ€" mined state assembly man by the name of Kelleher, denied in his bid to have the 112th Street Bridge reâ€"named after himself was beginning legal procedure to officially have his name changed to the 112th Street Bridge. Immortally either way. Federal Bank of Canada TUESDAY, August 24, 1993 "Clinton was supposed to bring in a health care policy in 100 days... so where is it? The 100 days are up," says Larry. "Nope, I And it is here in the conversaâ€" tion I realized how profoundly grateful I am to be a Canadian. Here was this man who brings up food from his home to byâ€"pass the inflated prices of wieners who can‘t afford to get treatment for his back because of the proâ€" hibitive health care costs in the States. Ironic, isn‘t it? to manage to work with chronic back problems. In fact, his doctor has told him he predicts no more than 10 more years of work for the baker. by Steve Nease PARTY CRUISES ALSO AVAILABLE CALL DAN 333â€"3675 . 32‘ FULLY EQUIPPED BOAT ates for Groups of 1â€"50 But the real dogâ€"daysâ€"ofâ€"sumâ€" merâ€"inâ€"Glenâ€"Fallsâ€"story surfaced at East Field, home of the Redbirds where I discovered Pete, the only seasonâ€"ticketâ€"holdâ€" ingâ€"dog in all of baseball. Dutch and Biddie Herman (he affectionâ€" ately calls her The Old Biddie and she affectionately throws looks at him in the form of poiâ€" son darts) loved to come to the Redbirds‘ games but didn‘t want to leave Pete, an aging French poodle, at home. So they skirted the noâ€"dogsâ€"allowed rule by buyâ€" ing Pat a season ticket. dodged a sizeable fine for breakâ€" ing the city‘s leash law by doing a disappearing act of Biblical proportions. didn‘t vote for Clinton. I voted for (Independent Ross) Perot." And on that wonderful evening as the sun set and everyone gathâ€" ered up the towels, the empty wiener packages, the ketchup and mustard and all the stones collectâ€" ed on the beach, I had to be everâ€" lastingly thankful to live in a country where financial worries are not yet an inextricable part of being ill. 4 No, you can have your hal" price wieners. I‘ll take a health care system that is the envy of the world â€" so far â€" and one I dearly hope isn‘t trashed by short sightâ€" ed politicians who don‘t recogâ€" nize it for the gem that it is. cuay