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su 1 iv r 1 i please the woodstove has been sold already if patty really wants to dump those puppies she just cant give away and if mickeys serious about hawking that new used car theyd be far better off to throw a woodstove in with the package and put an ad in the tribune rather than dialing a bunch of sevens because as weve discovered this week used wood- stoves are hot if youll pardon the pun based upon the endless phone calls that have been tying up our line ever since we placed an ad for our outdated lakewood in this weeks trib i would ven ture to say that every second person in stouffville and uxbridge is in the market for a used airtight wood burning heating device regular readers might remember my consterna tion a few months back when several insurance com panies refused to enter into a customerclient rela tionship with me because of the presence in our hack room of a woodstove that while most reliable belonged to a bygone age i finally threw my hands up in bitter resignation and promised never to light my lakewood again if they would throw a blanket policy over our house my predicament then became just what to do with a full sized double walled cast steel wood burning unit that weighs just less than a fully loaded tractor trailer having worked in a couple of stores that retail woodstoves in years gone by i was well aware of the funny noises and painful snapping sensations in the back that resulted from trying to lift these babies without proper equipment with visions of my old lakewood serving as a plant stand the rest of my days i contacted joan marsh- man at the tribune about running a small classified ad in hopes of catching somebody off guard to take the jolly green giants paper weight off my hands the ad specifically stated that the prospective pur chaser must pick the unit up him or herself and take it away within five minutes of the tribune hitting the streets i had my first call a man from ballantrae said hed be down some time that evening to have a look he arrived at the door about 15 minutes later and after glancing quickly at the goods took a 50 bill out of his pocket and said hed take it what incred ible luck my wife susan and i exclaimed gleefully jumping up and down that was the end of that we thought wrong the phone has not stopped ringing ever since people have been calling morning noon and night local and long distance leaving messages when were not home three four sometimes five consecutive calls have been coming in over a space of mere minutes its gotten to the point where the whole thing has become a major disruption to a routine already stretched to the limit by the presence in our home of a four month old infant one man called to say he had a similar woodstove warehouse open to the public closet shelving limited quantities we make free house calls hours monsat 10 6 pm sunday 15 pm container solutions 136 etrt beaver creek road unit 7 richmond hm on mb 1e2 905 7718412 fax 905 7718413 from where i live bruce stapley table in the tribune classified page just find a derelict wood stove to add to the deal and youre sure to succeed who knows it may even work with personal ads how about single insert colour race reli gion or creed here female with woodstove seeks man who can light a fire hey its a lot better than dialing all those sevens and oh yes please no more calls about the woodstove he didnt need and wanted to know if it would be worth his while to put an ad in the tribune to try to sell it i told him to hire a temporary receptionist maybe i could ask more than 50 for it he mused in what had to be the most redundant obser vation since noahs wife men tioned how it looked like rain so to everyone out there trying to flog old tires a record changer or that antediluvian three legged vacation now pay later interlock repairs by v i wavy walks dippy drive sentry f qqdcsaoaaaaa i 9052943791 get your new cruise card at participating cruiseshipcenters book one of our exclusive top100 cruises and dont pay 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