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p4 tribune january 12 1994 st stouffville heritage railway is a reality trains are creating excite ment in europe with the futuristic technology of tilt ing trains designed by vir tual reality the trains will be fast and comfortable but they wont have the edge on us our heritage railway is unique and its steaming ahead with the support of the mayor and council 2000 and recent royal assent mpp larry oconnor pushed for a private mem bers bill schell lumber and duncan giles of giles chev olds are only a few who deserve thanks for bringing this about the heritage railway will be a tremendous boon to the town and it looks like its a reality for 1995 keep working the feds wnt to reshape beans tt sk tsk its absolutely appalling to think that my hardearned federal tax dollars are being wasted so blatantly according to an interesting little booklet called tales from the tax trough ii published by the national citizens coalition the former tory government and all those before them areporking us out of millions each year through useless programs and piggish mp luxuries this updated version reminds the more than 30000 taxpayers who angrily flipped through this book that one taxpayer year is based on 4500 that means us poor worker drones slug away for a full calen dar year for each 4500 the feder al government spends did you know that the federal tories dished out 147827 or 33 taxpayer years to examine how lullabies affect babies another 185910 went to inves tigate horizontal resistance to beans fortyone of us worked all year for that veggiebrained scheme sheesh oh heres another dilly federal tax dollars went to fund a book by janice and lynn andrews entitled bloodlines a collection of writings by lesbian sisters 8000 makes me wants to go out and work a whole lot of overtime many magazines also received grants from the federal porkmeis- ters in 1991 including the ever- impressive chickadee magazine 18000 and another 23000 on fiddlehead magazine would that kibble9 bits t r a c y k 1 b b be the vegetable kind or the coun try music version either way it makes me sick more than 139 million was spent from 1989 to 1992 wasting 31002 taxpayer years of working on the promotion of bilingualism some of which are likely warrant ed but 47000 to the centaur foundation for the performing arts renjal programme is hard to swallow another section of the tax trough booklet discusses the mps pension ripoff i sincerely hope canadas new liberal prime minister jean chretien will reform this goldplated offensive spending spree as it stands now all mps qualify for pension after only six years in office regardless of age wow if the private sector were as generous id be heading for the sunny south this time next year when a retired mp turns 60 his pension will jump to take into account all the accumulated infla tion during the years since retire ment in other words mps pen sions have unlimited protection against inflation sign me up i could lie real good if i had as much time as the feds to practice for example tory joe clark who enjoyed a stint as pm in the 1980s will receive 32 million at age 75 with a 78330 annual benefit im sure theres a logical expla nation for spending 58000 to find out what its like to work for the dominion grocery store chain sure there is its not their money i hope chretien puts his foot down during the liberal reign or it looks like us poor taxpayers will keep on filling the trough while the pigs er mps keep on emptying it well back to work i think the government wants to find out the effects of deseeding zucchini stouffville tribune publisher general manager editorinchief advertising director business manager operations manager patricia pappas andrew mair jo ann stevenson debra weller vivian oneil pamela nichols staff reporters tracy kibble julie caspersen roger belgrave photographers sjoerd witteveen steve somerville real estate ads joan marshman classified ads doreen deacon retail sales joan marshman doreen deacon distribution ariene maddock canadian publications mail sales product agreement 439010 published every wednesday by metroland printing publishing and distributing at 9 heritage rd markham ontario l3p 1m3 tel 2942200 the stouttvllie tribune published every wednesday at 244 main st stouttvllie is on ol the matroland printing publishing and distributing group ol suburban newspapers which includes ajaxplckorlng news advertiser aurora banner barrle advance brampton- guardian burlington post colllngwood connection etoblcoke guardian georgetown independentacton free press kingston this week lindsay this week markham economist sun midland express milton canadian champion mlsslssauga news newmarket era banner north york mirror northumberland news oakvlll beaver orlllla today oshawa- whrtby this week peterborough this week richmond hmthomhllkveughan libera scarbor ough mirror and uibrtdg tribune national sales representative metroland corporaie sales 4931300 6402100 6405477 fax no desire to relive toddler days ixhy would anyone with t teenagers long for the good old days when the offspring were cuddly and seriously believed we knew more than they did i loved my children when they were small but they constituted a major makework project for example mealtimes were bizarre with dinner at 5 pm and break fast about 12 hours later and however cute their clothes were i could never cram myself into them when they moved onto something more avant garde its a well known fact that small children like to watch the same movie 568 times which would be fine except that they like you to watch it with them indeed there was a time i could have recited the entire script of mary poppins backwards songs by such icons of relentless good cheer as sharon lois and bram and raffi were their staole musi cal diet while im not knocking these merry minstrels there was some thing faintly embarrassing about being caught in the act of singing baby beluga as i wheeled my trolley around the supermarket it was also tough to appear cool and mysterious with a screaming toddler attached to ones right leg and a driedup patch of pureed carrot on ones left shoulder shopping for clothes with underthrees in tow was an inter esting challenge but not one i have any desire to relive my youngest child would usually be in the stroller which no matter where i parked it was always located on a major highway through the store my son meanwhile would amuse himself by divebombing racks of pants and sending them flying in all directions much as id have liked to disown him i knew if i turned away for one sec ond he would have disappeared into the coats or be hotfooting it out of the store when toddlers are thwarted their screams of protest can be heard in markham teenagers conversely slam the door of their room with an almighty crash and maintain a stony silence until they want to borrow your new sweater or the car nowadays i guess ralph waldo emerson would have been taken to court for his sentiments but he definitely had a point when he said a child is a curly dimpled lunatic